Forgiveness by Katherine Tate

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Forgiveness, Part 3
Katherine Tate

Devon walked a short way into the forest, following his footsteps on the fresh fallen snow. Maybe she hadn't heard the exchange between John and Bess the other morning, but she had seen it. It didn't surprise her that Bess would make a plea for mercy on behalf of Morgan; it did surprise her that Danziger would so roughly reject it.

Devon had assumed that Danziger's fists had flown that night in the heat of fear and rage. But by now he must have surely calmed down and the more rational aspects of his personality taken over.

She found him leaning up against a boulder, lost in thought. It was obvious he hadn't heard her coming as his expression was quite open. Reading his face she saw only anxiety and pain. She hesitated to intrude on his thoughts and yet for the sake of the group she stepped forward. They had to live together at close quarters for a long time. She couldn't have them at each other's throats.

"I think it's feeling a bit warmer, don't you?" she asked by way of starting a conversation. His face closed over with the mask of indifference he wore too often.

"No, actually, I was thinking it feels colder."

Devon was about to chide him for always, always disagreeing with her; but, in fact, she was feeling colder too. She sat down next to him on the boulder.

"I guess you're right. Just wishful thinking on my part. I'm so eager to be on the road again."

"Yeah."

"John, how long are you going to be able to keep up this animosity between you and Morgan?" she asked him bluntly.

"I dunno. Until that weasel chokes his last breath, I s'pose."

Devon didn't believe him. And she knew he didn't believe it either because he'd said it so casually. She took his arm by the elbow.

"C'mon John, she wasn't hurt. It was an accident."

"He could have killed her!"

"But he didn't. Are you going to hold onto anger just because it feels good? Does it feel good?"

Danziger looked away.

"No, not really."

"You know, if someone shot Uly I think I'd shoot back first and ask questions later." Devon said, surprising him. She laughed lightly. "I'm just glad Alonzo had the MagPro or you might have felt like letting a charge loose on Morgan."

"Give me *some* credit, Adair!"

"Well, you weren't thinking very clearly, were you?" Devon shrugged. "I don't blame you. As I said, I would probably do something extremely violent if anyone ever hurt Uly. At least, in the heat of the moment . . . "

"One of these days Morgan is going to do something really dumb. And someone is going to get hurt."

"Don't forget it was Morgan who got Julia the Grendler saliva that saved *your* life." Devon pointed out. "Everyone does stupid things some times. There are accidents. Let's just be thankful that she wasn't hurt and let's move on."

"It felt really good, hitting him like that." Danziger said, frankly. Devon, smiling, gave him a shove.

"Some days it would feel really good to hit you too."

"Why was he doing shooting at her anyway?" Danziger grumbled.

"He saw a Grendler." Devon stated. Danziger flinched. "What was *she* doing wandering around in the middle of the night?" Danziger didn't answer. To tell the truth, he didn't know. In the panic of the moment it hadn't seemed important to ask. He remembered her saying something about it being her fault. "Why don't you tell me what's really bugging you?" Devon asked.

"What, like having Morgan shoot at True isn't enough to upset me?"

"You've been upset for a lot longer than that, John."

He turned away.

"I just want to get moving again." he mumbled.

After a moment of silence Devon could see that he wasn't going to talk to her and she didn't feel like she could betray True's confidence just yet. She took a few steps back towards the camp.

"Well, since you're out here, you may as well take a look around for something we might be able to eat . . . "

He whirled around.

"Yeah, THAT'S WHAT I'M *REALLY* GOOD AT THAT, ISN'T IT?!" he shouted, "FINDING SOMETHING TO EAT!"

His flash of temper had caught Devon off her guard and she involuntarily took a step backwards, stumbling over a branch to land on her back in the snow. For a second Danziger towered over her, then he stepped back.

"You afraid of me Adair?" he asked, surprised. His shoulders slumped in a defeated posture; all the menace of his anger was gone. Devon scrambled to her feet.

"No, John." she reached out to him, but he stepped further back and leaned against the boulder again.

"I don't know why you wouldn't be." he said, low but loud enough for her to hear.

Devon couldn't stand it any longer. She walked over and put her arms around him. His head pressed into her chest; she could feel how unhappy he was. The emotion was pouring out of his tense muscles in his back. Keeping one hand on his head, she stroked his back, as she would Uly's after he'd had a nightmare. He could feel the coolness of her new necklace pressed against his cheek.

"John," she scolded, softly, "how could I be afraid of you after all you've done for us?"

"I don't what's happened to me." Danziger said sadly. "I don't seem to have any self-control anymore. I hit Morgan . . . I *still* want to hit Morgan. I killed a creature without, without any thought to its life or, or, or what that would mean to others like it. I hit Alonzo just for talking 'bout *you*.

"C'mon, Danziger!" Devon tried to interrupt him but he plowed on as though she hadn't spoken.

"And let's not forget that I shot and killed Katrina. Geez, if Gaal were ever to resurface I would murder him too, without hesitation. I guess I came to the right place - good ol' penal colony G889!"

"Stop this right now!" Devon commanded in a maternal tone. "I've had just about enough of *this* attitude, John Danziger!" She shook him by the shoulders; he stared at his boots. "You have done what you had to do in order to survive, in order for *us* to survive. Sure, hitting Alonzo and Morgan was out of anger - but I'd say you were provoked." Devon put her arms around him once again. She added, "At least in the case of Morgan you were." Devon still wasn't too sure why Danziger had hit Alonzo in the spider's cave and she didn't want to get into that. "The important thing is to move past it. Forgive him for his mistake and apologize for your own. Isn't that what you'd tell True? As a parent?"

Danziger broke away from their embrace clumsily. He rubbed his eyes in a tired and resigned way.

"Yeah, probably."

Devon stood awkwardly, not knowing what to do with her hands now that they were no longer needed for comfort. Danziger looked over to her; his mask gone, his eyes sad. But was it her imagination or did he seem a bit more relaxed than when she'd first come out here?

"Good. We're in this together Danziger, don't forget that. Don't ever forget that!" He nodded, with a weak attempt at a smile. "Now don't take this in any way other than the one it is intended - since you're out here, you may as well look for something to eat!"

Now he did smile at her, one of those cocky, superior smiles he put on when he felt he knew more than she did.

"Right, boss!" He tried to give her a salute but she grabbed his hand before it could make it up to his head. They laughed a little awkwardly. She turned to go.

"Hey Adair!" he called after her. Still walking towards the camp she turned around. "Thanks."

"Right, boss!" She did salute him and continued back to their camp. It was starting to snow again.

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Julia was pondering the possible causes of Alonzo's illness. His vital signs were stable now, but it had been a close call. Too close for Julia's liking. Especially since she wasn't entirely certain what the source of his allergic reaction was. If she didn't identify it, what was to prevent it from happening again?

Uly entered her medtent, disturbing her thoughts. Distracted she glanced at the boy.

"What's up, champ?" she asked.

Uly frowned. He was looking at Alonzo with concern.

"Is he OK?" the boy asked.

"For now." Julia said. Then, realizing that this didn't sound very comforting to an eight year old, she added. "He's going to be right as rain in a day or so, just wait."

Still concerned Uly looked at Julia.

"I think Mom is sick too."

Julia immediately stood up, her hands instinctively reaching for her equipment.

"What do you mean?"

"She's coughing a lot. She said she was tired and had to lie down. Yale told me to come and get you."

That was all Julia needed to hear. Pushing Uly ahead of her, she exited the tent and ran for the dome. She found Devon lying on her cot, wheezing and gasping for breath. Yale was holding her hand. Yale stepped away to give Julia some room, but he did not let go of Devon's hand.

With an outward calmness that gave no hint of how she was really feeling, Julia began to scan Devon.

"Can someone please go to the medtent and stay with Alonzo?" she asked. She nodded her thanks to Baines, when he volunteered.

It was definitely the same reaction that Alonzo had. Julia administered her drug knowing that it would help in the short term, but what was causing this? As she made the injection, Julia examined Devon's neck carefully. There was a red mark, almost like a rash that led down to Devon's chest. Slowly, Julia pulled back the top of Devon's shirt. She gasped. There was a large blistering sore on Devon's chest, just where . . . where her necklace dangled.

Alonzo's hands were blistered.

"It's the stones." Julia said quickly. "They're reacting to the stones somehow." She pulled the necklace off Devon and dropped it quickly onto the floor.

"But Uly worked with the stones and he is not sick." Yale pointed out. Julia looked over at the boy. His hands had not blistered from making the necklace for his mother. Julia's mind turned over rapidly trying to piece together this puzzle.

"I don't know. Uly may be protected somehow by his Terrian DNA." Julia stood up. "Yale, help me get her to the medtent. I want them both together where I can keep my eye on them."

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Bess and Morgan had not had any success in their search. This was mostly due to the fact that Morgan had spent the entire time dealing aloud with his guilt over the shooting incident. Bess had been patient, as usual, but was showing signs of wear when they finally made their way back into the camp.

"How's Alonzo?" Bess asked Cameron, who stood outside the dome.

"Julia says he'll be alright. But now Devon's sick too."

"What?! Oh no." Morgan moaned. "As if we haven't been through enough already, now we're all going to die from some plague."

Bess had had enough.

"Morgan! Be quiet! No one's going to die." She took his hand. "Let's go see Julia." she added more gently. Everyone was so uptight these days.

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In the medtent Julia had pretty much confirmed her theory that the stones had caused the blisters, which had then caused the respiratory failure. Both of her patients were conscious again, but feeling weak. Bess entered, followed by Morgan. Julia looked past him, hoping Danziger would follow. She should have known that Danziger wouldn't be around if Morgan was there.

"Everyone OK?" Bess asked softly.

"It was the stones." Julia told her. "Those stupid stones!"

Bess looked at Julia's necklace, lying under her microscope on the table. It was hard to believe such a beautiful thing could be the source of such pain.

"I guess it's a good thing you didn't put yours on." Bess told her. Suddenly, Alonzo tried to sit up. Julia rushed over.

"Take it easy, flyboy. You need to stay put."

"True." Alonzo whispered. "True has a necklace too."

"Where is True?" Julia asked the Martins. Bess looked blank; Morgan looked guilty. But then, Morgan always looked guilty when True's name was mentioned these days.

"I, uh, I saw her leaving camp earlier." Morgan stammered. Bess looked surprised. "It was when you were with Julia." he told her.

"Morgan, this is very important. Was she wearing the necklace?" Julia asked him urgently.

"Um, I don't know. I don't remember. Ah, no I don't think she was . . . Wait! Yes! Yes, she definitely had it on. Yes, she did. For sure. I'm sure of it."

"Oh no." Julia said, putting a worried hand on her head. "Where's Danziger?"

Devon, who had been listening from her horizontal position, struggled up. She felt lousy and it still hurt to take a breath.

"He's . . . foraging." she told the group.

Julia grabbed her headset and tried to raise either Danziger. No luck.

"Was True foraging too?" Bess asked Morgan. He shook his head; he didn't really know what she was doing. Devon was shaking her head.

"She's gone . . . she's gone to look for . . . for . . . a Grendler." Devon said with an effort. "She's been . . . feeding it."

This created a stir amongst the small group. Julia began to pack up some of her supplies.

"What are you going to do?" Bess asked her.

"I have to go after her. If she's wearing those stones it's only a matter of time before she reacts too. And without some medical attention, she'll die."

"You should stay here with the others." Morgan told her. "Danziger should be the one going out there." Morgan could just imagine what John's reaction would be to this situation.

"Well, Danziger isn't here to go, is he!" Julia snapped. Morgan reached out and took hold of Julia's bag.

"Then I'm going with you."

"Morgan?" It was hard to say who was more surprised, Bess or Julia.

"I was the last one to see her. I know the direction she was heading. I can carry her back if she's sick. I owe her. I owe her and Danziger that much."

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True was breathing heavily as she struggled to walk through the powdery snow. The wind had picked up which made the light snow blow in circles. She hoped it wouldn't snow any harder; she didn't want to turn back until she'd found the Grendler. She hadn't been able to find him last night and she was worried about him. True didn't know much about Grendlers and their health but it seemed to her that he hadn't been looking all that well the last time she'd seen him. Of course, there was always the possibility that Morgan's shots had scared him away for good.

"Hey, Grendler? Hello?!" True called, stopping for a moment to take a good look around. She hadn't seen any tracks or other evidence of the Grendler's presence. But she was already much further away from the camp than she'd intended to go. She didn't want Dad to miss her and worry. "Grendler? Where are you?"

True had thrown on Alonzo's necklace with the idea of giving it to the Grendler so he would have something to trade with the others. Maybe then he'd be allowed back into their group and they would feed him. There could be no question of the Grendler joining the Eden Advance Group. Devon had already expressed displeasure at True smuggling their precious and ever-dwindling food supplies to him. This would be the last trip True would make. So she wanted to give him a gift.

But she wouldn't be able to give him anything unless she could find him. If only the snow weren't so deep! She couldn't seem to catch her breath.

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"True!" Julia called, as she followed Morgan. Morgan wasn't shouting; he was too busy concentrating on finding True's footprints in the snow. It wasn't too hard to follow True's tracks, except in places where the wind and new falling snow had covered them over.

"Here! Over here!" Morgan called to Julia, having spotted the girl's trail again.

"Well, at least she's still mobile." Julia muttered, under her breath.

End part 3

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