Ananda by Maggie C, Lilly321

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Ananda (3/5)
by Elizabeth Jones
and Maggie C.

Darkness. The place was black inside and out, even when he opened his eyes. Not that he was having a lot of success at that; not that he was having much success at doing anything. Even breathing was a chore. He felt like he was swimming underwater at great depths, felt the pressure squeezing in on him, choking the life out of him.

"He's awake" announced an accented voice off to his side. Danziger tried to turn his head...and again failed miserably. His head was in one position on his shoulders and for the minute that's the way it was staying. Instead he squinted in the voices general direction.

Only to be accosted by a voice coming at him from the other side. "Let's see if he is or just dozin'." Oh I don't like the sound of that came in, his first thought in a while.

And it was right. A foot connected with his chest sending a flash of pain burning through it like fire from the inside out. Those ribs were *definitely* broken. Ironically, ///Julia's gonna kill me/// was the only thought that crossed his pain filled mind. He struggled valiantly to retain his waking state, if only to know one thing.

"True " he rasped " the girl..."

"Aye the gel" answered Voice Number One "we let her go-didn't need 'er seein as we've you. Sides she'll go on back to camp and spread 'er story. Soerly the rest of your lot will come searching you out. Bringin' that pretty auburn bird with 'em."

The voice paused here and the other joined it in laughter. Danziger felt the wrath rekindling in his wandering mind, focusing it. They frightened True ...they would have done worse. ///And so help me they won't get within a foot of her or Devon. /// Ribs be damned. The laughter died out, that grating voice finished its monologue with one final promise. "And that man who accompanies her now? We'll have our final revenge on him as well...teach him to cast us out..."

The voice stopped - came around to Danziger's back. ///I knew that man was trouble/// was his last thought before the world again went black.

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Devon turned in her sleep and felt a presence in the room other than her own. Her wide blue eyes flew open...only to see the small worried face of True very close to hers.

"True" She rasped by way of greeting. Devon blinked against the harshness of the morning light. Has your father returned was on the tip of her tongue to ask, but there was no need: one look at the girl's small pinched face told Devon the worst.

"Come on True". She swung her legs over the edge of the cot, heart heavy in her chest. "Let's go get some breakfast."

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In the biodome, the entire Eden Advance was having breakfast. Even Shepherd, though he sat apart from the others. Without Devon by his side he was unsure of his welcome here. He didn't want to make the situation worse by forcing his company on anyone. Still he'd managed to find a seat that allowed him to see and hear everything that went on without being seen himself.

"I tell you," Magus was saying to Baines "He's managed to get himself in trouble *again*. Honestly, I don't know how the man does it."

"Should just shoot him and be done with it" Baines grumbled.

"Oh and *you* are a fine one to talk." she snorted, then went on back to the "kitchen" to help with breakfast detail.

"So" Uly prodded, sitting at the breakfast table with his tutor, "I guess since we're all going to find Mr. Danziger that means you'll be too busy for lessons?"

He shriveled under the look Yale gave him. "What have I told you about time and place?" The boy looked down scuffing his foot on the floor. He did look as if he were honestly ashamed but - "I had to ask"

"I'm going to kill him." Julia Heller seethed. "I'm going to absolutely *kill* him. What was he thinking to wander off *on his own* after being so *sick*?"

"Julia," Alonzo began.

"Don't Julia me, I'm too upset at the moment." She jerked her bowl so abruptly away from Bess that the woman gave her a look that if looks could kill, Julia would be a pile of ashes on the floor. Heller didn't even notice.

"Not half as much as True or Devon I'll bet." the pilot answered softly.

"Yes that's true and it makes me even more upset!" Julia sat down on the nearest bench, slamming her bowl on the table. "He should have thought..."

Julia's mini-tirade was interrupted by the arrival of Devon and True. The teasing died on the lips of the Advancers when they saw the drawn look woman and girl both shared. The sympathetic silence lasted only minutes; it built back to a crescendo as over a dozen voices shouted out their questions. Which were, although phrased differently, along the same line - what now?

Devon Adair turned, looked the crowd over. Then very slowly she raised her hand, the universal sign for attention. In response the voices once again died down. Shepherd watched her take charge with open admiration. ///We are both born to be leaders, /// he mused, ///but she does it so much better than I ever could. The things we could accomplish...///

He turned his attention back to Devon who was declaring her intent to form several scout teams. It was what he had expected and what he had been dreading most.

"True," Devon questioned the girl, "do you think you could lead us to the place where it happened?"

True gave a small nod her eyes wide and staring into Devon's as if she were afraid to look anywhere else. "It was near that big pine tree grove, down by the river to the east."

That big pine grove...down on the east bank of the Tyne. Shepherd's head snapped up, he observed Devon's reaction carefully. When she gave no outward sign of alarm he knew she had no clue as to what danger lay there. ///How could she? /// a little voice taunted him ///You were not exactly dying to tell her. /// Shepherd winced at his choice of words. Never mind, he would tell her now himself.

Ignoring the rude looks and muttered words from the others he pushed his way through the crowd until he was standing at Devon's side. He noticed with some irritation that True still shrank back from his approach. ///Now is not the time for fear little one. At this moment you and I are on the same side. ///

Best to be as least threatening as possible. He stepped in closer to Devon, then addressed True. "Did you see these men?"

The girl looked over at Devon, and only after the older woman nodded in encouragement did she answer in a strong clear voice. "Yes I did."

"And what do they look like?" ///Please do not let it be who I fear it may be. /// His worst fears were confirmed as True gave out the details.

"The first man," she described, "was tall, taller than Dad and he had long black hair and a beard. The second one was short with curly red hair and he had an accent."

Shepherd gave the girl a small smile, then turned to Adair. "Joshua Hapsburg and Michael Berman," he told her softly, not caring that the rest of the Advance was making much out of their whispering, "I had to put them above ground two maybe three springs ago. They killed a man, then assaulted his woman. The Community was almost put out for that one."

Devon let his words sink in for a moment, then she was all business again. ///I can see she's still troubled. That is not going to make what I have to say any easier. ///

"So." she whispered back, "with your knowledge of the men in question, would you consider being on a team?" She had completely surprised him. Yes she does seem good at that. Devon had voiced his desires before he could even form the words. ///Amazing. ///

"I would." he nodded, trying not to show how pleased he really was. "However I would suggest at least three to a team."

Devon shook her head in the affirmative. She gave him one last smile, then turned back to the group.

"All right everyone, listen up." she addressed the group. "We have a pretty good idea where to locate Danziger." She paused for a moment, letting her words cause a little mini-sensation, then waiting a bit more for it to fizzle out. When it was quiet again she went on. "However, we have reason to believe his captors are dangerous men." Another mini-sensation but this one Devon hurried to squash; too many of the Advance were darting suspicious glances in Shepherd's direction. She cried out over the din. "Teams are..." That got everyone's attention. When everything was under tenuous control-again- she went on. " Julia, Alonzo, and Denner are team one, Bess, Morgan, and Cameron are team two, Baines, Magus, and Matazl are team three, and Shepherd, Walman, and myself are the final team." She looked over the crowd until she caught the eyes of her aged tutor. "I would prefer if you stayed with the children."

Yale nodded, though the children immediately began to raise howls of protest. Devon turned her attention back to the larger group. "Any questions?" When there were no questions forthcoming, she gave the group a huge smile of relief. "All right let's get going."

She turned and walked off, and the crowd behind her began to disperse, everyone hurrying to their assigned groups. Everyone except Shepherd. He stood where he was, rooted in place. The argument with Devon that he'd feared was at hand. ///She is not going to like what I have to say but I will be heard. /// He vowed to himself. Still for the moment all he could do was watch her weaving in and out among her people, and hope he had the right words to say.

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John Danziger was in a world of hurt, even when he was asleep. His dreams, instead of being welcome escapes, were just another form of torture. So many dreams, so many variations on a theme. True or Devon, hurt terribly while he lay there helpless to stop it.

Then suddenly, the nightmare lifted. Left in its wake was a near blinding white light, heat, and blowing sands. Though he had never before experienced it, Danziger knew beyond a doubt where he was. The dreamplane.

Now the question was - how had he gotten there?

"Why?" he called aloud, not expecting an answer. So he was surprised, to say the least, to receive an answer.

"Seems I should be the one asking the questions."

Danziger knew that voice, and it belonged to someone he could call friend. The Elder smiled, like a father who is once again dealing with a favorite though unruly child. "Things not going well?"

Danziger scoffed, amazed at the Elder's talent for understatement. "You could say that." Seeing that he wanted an explanation, he went into details. "I went for a walk to get away from^Å" and at the knowing look, amended, "to think about things. I ran into Uly who was looking for True. They were playing hide and seek and Uly couldn't find her, so he went back to camp. True came out of her hiding place and we were just about to go back to camp when I heard voices. I didn't even stop to think - I put her up in a tree. It was too late for me though."

"And that's how you came to be lying in some cave, beaten within an inch of your life," the Elder concluded. When Danziger just shrugged, he shook his head. "Can't you manage to stay out of trouble for more than three days?"

"No, trouble finds me," he answered seriously, making the Elder laugh. "Besides I don't think it's me they want to beat damn near to death. In fact I know it's not me. They mentioned Shepherd." Beneath his breath, almost to himself, Danziger added. "They'll have to stand in line to wait to lay that one out."

The Elder, pretending not to have heard Danziger's last comment, asked him. "These men did you get their names?"

"As a matter of fact I did." His eyes met the Elder's. "Hapsburg and Berman." A sudden swell of hope hit him hard when he saw the recognition in the Elder's eyes. "Do you know them?"

"I do." The Elder's answer was flat and noncommittal.

Now it was Danziger's turn to dig for information. "And?"

All the Elder would say was "And I'm ...what's the phrase...sending in the calvary."

Then before Danziger added anything more, the Elder disappeared, the light flared out, and the nightmares descended.

The Elder took his hand off the Terrian, stepped back, and opened his eyes. He waved over one of his most trusted men. "The Governor, his lady, and a... friend...may be in trouble," was all he said. "Gather ten of your most trusted men, and find Hapsburg and Berman before they do." The man nodded, then moved off.

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Unfortunately for him and his cause, Shepherd finally found Devon half an hour before the teams were scheduled to depart. ///Time is of the essence, I have no time to be subtle. /// She's smiling - now's the time. So he came right out and said it.

"Devon," his heart pounding, "I don't want you to go on that scout." Oh yes he saw right away that this was a bad move. Devon's blue eyes darkened, going mid-night blue with her repressed fury. And when she spoke again she was no longer Devon; she was Ms Adair, ready to defeat her enemies at the negotiating table. The mask was in place.

"And why?" she asked, tone steely. "What reasons do I have to remove myself from this search?"

Shepherd noted with some irritation that she had moved even further away from him. ///What will she make me scream her secrets to the entire camp? /// He refused to be denied; she was *not* going to win this one. Coming closer to her he closed the space between them. " Devon, I'm not comfortable with _any_ woman being on that scout." Moment of truth. He looked deep into her eyes, hoping she'd see his good intentions reflected there. "Especially you given matters."

Devon knew exactly what he meant. For just a moment she shrank back from him. Just for a minute the mask fell away, revealing the confusion beneath the cool exterior. Then before he could act on the change, the mask snapped firmly back into place. Only this time the mask was backed by cold fury. "How dare you," she bristled," how dare you use my past as a means to control what I do."

"That was not what I intended" he began, reaching out to touch her again.

Devon however was kinetic, bouncing off things like a pinball, then going in an opposite direction. She just could not hold still. Then again if she held still for very long she'd probably strangle Shepherd.

"Don't start with me," she stormed, "just don't start with me. I never should have..." Her voice trailed off as she realized just what she was about to say.

Shepherd felt his anger rising to meet hers; he too knew how that sentence ended. "Go on Devon, finish what you have to say." He adopted a similar stance to hers, then finished." You never should have asked me to come back with you."

Devon met his gaze, defiant. "Perhaps." she answered coolly.

Shepherd decided to switch tactics of persuasion. Adding a reflective tone to his voice, he went on. "You're a very closed person Devon Adair, at least in your waking hours."

Adair broke his gaze; suddenly the floor was unbelievably interesting. Her would be protector just chuckled grimly, continuing. "Is that what bothers you the most about having me here? Knowing that someone you have daily contact knows who you truly are? And not just the public, perfect image you project to the world?"

"Not so." Devon countered, feeling increasingly antagonistic toward the man. "These people are my friends, I have nothing to hide from them." Her head came up, a look of conviction across her features. "In fact they are more real to me than anyone else I've ever known, and vice versa." The words -like you- hung unspoken in the air.

///I doubt very much that is so,/// Shepherd assured himself. None the less this tactic is not working. Perhaps an attempt at appeasement would be for the best. Assure her - yes that was it. "All my suggestion was, was for your protection. Regardless of what you say, you I know both know your past. I was just trying to keep you safe."

"Safe," she repeated, spitting the word out. She made a patented Adair gesture of disgust. "Sounds patronizing to me, no matter how nicely you word it." She stepped away from him, and headed towards the door. Just before she went outside, she paused in the doorway, then turned around to face him. "I'm going on that scout but if it makes you feel any better I'm taking a very big gun. Maybe if I'm lucky I'll get a good shot in and send one of those bastards to hell where they belong." If her atypical swearing and violence didn't readily show her inner disquietude, then slamming the door behind her certainly did.

Shepherd sighed, sat back down even though he knew his "team" was waiting for him. He sat and wondered, not for the first time, if he and Devon ever had a chance of working out.

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Outside, the other member of team four was waiting arrival of the other two with growing impatience. He wanted to get this show on the road; the sooner they got moving, the sooner they found Danziger.

Watching Devon come storming out of the common area - without Shepherd - made him stop to think that departure might be a bit delayed for Team Four. Devon didn't seem to care if she ever saw Shepherd again, scout or no scout, he observed.

Normally he wasn't one to pry into another's affairs. He'd leave that task to Bess. However, this time he had to know. This was after all Devon Adair, a woman he felt a strange need to protect.

He cleared his throat to let her know he was there. Devon looked over at him, embarrassed that someone had observed the tail end of her temper tantrum.

"Walman." she said coolly as way of greeting.

He answered, "Devon..." Then he took a deep breath and jumped right in. "Is anything wrong?"

Devon glared at him, knowing perfectly well what he was talking about but deftly trying to avoid the issue. "Danziger's been captured by some bloodthirsty penal colonists and you ask me what's wrong?!?!" she yelled, using her own anger and fear at John's current state to distract herself from the bad memories her argument with Shepherd had brought back.

Walman hurried to explain, not wanting to be the target of Devon Adair's legendary anger. "No, that's not it, Devon, I meant," he took a moment to choose his next words very carefully, "is Shepherd still coming on the scout with us or did something go wrong?" It didn't work, Devon was still glaring at him. Walman was saved from another outburst by Shepherd's approach.

Shepherd walked up to Devon. He decided he had to try one last time to convince Devon to stay. If anything happened to her . . . "Devon, please reconsider staying here with the children. Yale can join us in searching for Danziger." Try as he might, Shepherd could not keep the slight hint of aversion from creeping into his voice as he said Danziger's name. And unfortunately, Devon had caught it. She opened her mouth to say something, but Shepherd cut her off. "Devon," he continued, glancing at Walman, who was watching the whole exchange with interest, "I just don't want to see you hurt, these men are *extremely* dangerous and unpredictable."

"How dangerous?" Walman cut in, his curiosity piqued.

Shepherd answered him honestly. "I've heard about your run-in with Gaal. These men are a hundred times worse than that. I suspect that the only reason Danziger is still alive is because they want to lure us to them."

Walman caught the unspoken words - if Danziger's still alive at all. His impatience to go out and find Danziger just tripled, at least. He shot a worried glance at Devon, who had gone pale at Shepherd's words but was still managing to glare full force at the man. Walman suddenly considered that Shepherd might be right, it might be better if Devon stayed here, where she was safe. If something happened to her, Walman knew that Danziger would have his head ///If he survives/// Walman thought darkly. Not to mention that Yale and Uly would blame him as well, and of course, Walman would blame himself most of all.

Devon broke out of her momentary silence and addressed Shepherd. "Look, Shepherd, we covered this already," she said, her voice as cold as ice. "I am going on the scout."

"Devon, maybe he has a point," Walman broke in. Devon looked at him, shocked that he would turn on her too. "It would be a lot safer for you at camp."

"That is enough," Devon practically growled, glaring at the two men with absolute fury in her eyes. "Now look, you two. Absolutely nothing you say would convince me to stay at camp. In case you have forgotten, Danziger is out there somewhere, and I intend to find him. You two can either stay here and continue this macho posturing or come and help me." With that she grabbed her pistol and headed out of camp. Walman and Shepherd had little choice but to grab their own supplies and head out after her.

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End Part 3

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