Devon Alone V: The Dream, The Dark and The Light by Nicole Mayer

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DEVON, ALONE Part V
The Dream, the Dark, and the Light (10/11)
by Nicole Mayer

"You knew," said Danziger as Devon stumbled backward, barely hearing his words. The Stations were real, that nightmare, it had actually happened...and that was where she was *now*, stuck in some virtual reality chamber.

No wonder she had felt a connection with the planet. She controlled it! Now she could remember it all so clearly, the agony of realising the station-Danziger didn't love her, the desire to put an end to the misery, and the innate knowledge that she didn't belong on the stations anyway.

No, as a Replica, a computer copy of a person, she belonged within a computer generated world. It was her destiny. And that's what she'd decided, only moments before pressing the release seal on the airlock. Devon had secretly made her way back to the Program she owned, and literally plugged herself in. She wanted no witnesses, no one to come after her. As far as the stations could be concerned, she was dead.

Now Devon could remember the pain. She had placed the wires into her head by herself, not really caring if they became eternally fused with the delicate membrane of her skull. There had been a terrible, painful jolt of electricity as the merge took hold, destroying the Replica circuitry implanted into her head. Then she had forgotten everything she needed to and begun to float in the darkness. Back to her world, her G889. With the only friends a Replica could ever have.

Tears momentarily clouded Devon's vision. She fought them back and forced her breathing to slow. *It doesn't matter, it doesn't matter* she coached herself over and over. *This life on G889 is the best thing you could have, it's the only life for you.*

She raised her eyes to John Danziger, still standing silently before her. There was nothing she could do to take back the revelation, but she could try her hardest to forget it. All she had to do was modify Danziger's character so that he would love her, and everything would be perfect. She would live and die in this celluloid world happily...

"Voice command." Devon spoke more confidently as memories of the modifications she'd made came back to her. She directed her instructions upwards, although the commands would take effect no matter how she said them. "Access character John Danziger. Make him more...loving. More romantic. In love with..."

"Stop," came a voice, and Devon blinked in surprise. Danziger was speaking to *her*. But he shouldn't be doing that! She ignored him and continued her commands.

"Devon, stop," he said again. "I'm not who you think I am. I'm not him."

She did stop then, and looked carefully at him. He was right, there was something about his stance, something about his hair, something about his eyes...

They were the eyes of the station John Danziger. "What the hell are you doing here?" Devon spat, outraged and humiliated at the same time. How dare he invade her private world? How dare he pretend that he cared?

"I came in here after you," he said simply. His words were direct and honest, and Devon, suddenly so confused, was compelled to believe him.

"Why?" she asked, her voice beginning to tremble. "Because I couldn't picture my life without you in it." Devon's knees grew weak, and she swayed dangerously. But John Danziger, a *real* John Danziger, was there to catch her. He held her gently by the waist.

"Listen to me, Devon. I did a lot of thinking after that night." They both knew exactly what night he was referring to, the night when Devon had thrown herself at him and it ended in tears. "And I found out some things about you, and what the Council had done to you. Why didn't you tell me?"

"Tell you what?"
"That you were a Replica?" Danziger's eyes searched Devon's for answers.

"I didn't know," she said in a small voice. Danziger would have once been angered by her words, but he was past all that now. He would make the Council pay for what they had done later.

"But you do know."
And that was true as well, for on some small subconscious level, Devon had known that she wasn't human. The feeling hadn't been definable, and she hadn't even been able to put it into words until the Terrians showed her the truth. A truth, it turned out, that had been locked away in her own mind, something she hadn't been able to reach until just recently. It was the last legacy of the real Devon Adair.

"I've been watching you in this program..." continued Danziger.

"For how long?" Devon snapped. "Just like Blalock and Reilly, are you? The watcher who wants to control my destiny? And then you came in here and invaded my world and you ruined everything! Everything!"

"No!" protested Danziger, feeling her body trembling in his grasp. "I wanted to find you, Devon. I couldn't believe that you were dead. And then I discovered that the Program was running..."

"Yes, the Program was running," Devon broke in, then gave a harsh, sarcastic laugh. "Poor crazy Devon went and threw herself into virtual reality. Well I'm staying here," she declared. "It's where I belong. I don't have a life on the stations. I couldn't even make friends!"

"No, Devon, you did," protested Danziger. "How do you think I got here? Morgan, Kassidy - they both wanted to help you as well. And so did Yale, when he found out the truth. Only..." Danziger realised he had better keep quiet about Yale's fate for the time being. The termination...

Devon suddenly remembered the voices hovering above her after she'd been struck by lightning. He could be telling the truth, for John's voice had been there, along with Morgan's, and Bess/Kassidy saying, "You cannot let her die."

But no, they wouldn't come after her. She didn't deserve it, and they shouldn't be worrying about a Replica like her. Devon summoned all of her resolve to push Danziger away a final time.

"I want you out of here," she said in a steely voice. "I'm not leaving without you," he replied just as evenly. "Damn it, John, go away! This is *my* life here!" she repeated. "I was happy before you showed up! I was happy..." Her anguished voice wistfully trailed off.

"How can you live like this?" Danziger countered. "How can you live knowing that every moment of your life is a lie? You're a real person, Devon Adair! I heard these virtual characters telling you that, and you *believed* them! Or is that the only fantasy you can handle?"

"You don't understand," protested Devon despondently. "No, you're the one who doesn't understand. You can't stay here forever. Sooner or later, the program is going to break down. Reality will fall apart, or maybe the computers keeping your body alive will begin to malfunction. Do you really want that?"

"It's better than being alone!"
"Devon, you're not going to be alone!" Danziger shouted, hoping desperately to get through to her. "I promise, I won't let you be alone!"

"But you won't love me."
"And is it better to be in love with a computer image?" Danziger sighed in frustration and ran one hand through his hair and Devon used the opportunity to step further away. "Devon, come back with me. Leave this world," he pleaded.

"Why don't you just pull me out?" she said bitterly, knowing that her dream-like life on G889 was over. All of her hopes and dreams had crashed around her, and she had nothing left. Everything was gone.

"Listen to me, Devon. If you don't come with me soon, you will die. We already tried to pull you out - remember the lightning strike?"

She nodded.
"You felt real pain then, because there's a feedback loop in the circuitry. We can't bring you out - you know, you managed to mess up those wires in your head pretty good," Danziger added darkly. "The only way out is if you willingly leave."

Devon stared straight at him, trying to make sense of her feelings. She knew now that she could not stay here on G889. She couldn't pretend any longer. But could she face a life on the outside?

"Devon," pleaded Danziger, "Come with me. You *do* have a life on the stations. We have a war against the Council to win! It began as your fight, your personal vendetta against the Council, but now it gives hope to thousands of people. I promise, Devon, we will *not* leave you alone."

Devon began to slowly nod. "And what about you?" she asked, her voice small and hesitant. "What will you...how do you...where..." She was unable to get her thoughts into coherent sentences.

"Where do *we* stand?" asked Danziger, understanding her perfectly. Devon nodded. "Right now, I don't know," he admitted. "But what I do know is that I want you in my life. We can start over. I want to get to know you better, the *real* Devon Adair, the one who is in control of all her memories. The real Devon Adair who isn't being manipulated by the Council."

Devon stifled a small sob. "The real Devon Adair is dead." "No she's not," Danziger declared. "She lives in you. She *is* you."

Devon looked up into his blue eyes. They showed no hostility, no fear, only the promise of understanding.

"Come with me, Devon," he said again. He reached out his hands. And finally she took them.

"Okay," she said in a small voice. "Okay." Danziger was right, it was time for her to start living again. Devon drew in a deep breath, and took one last look at the world around her. G889, the planet that had meant so much for the last year of her life. Her friends, the incredible Eden Advance. Julia and Uly - it was time to say farewell to them forever. She stared up at the strange, alien sky with the two luminescent moons and whispered, "Goodbye." Then she closed her eyes.

"End program."

Reality shimmered and *shifted* out of existence. The Program closed down forever, and with it went every person Devon had loved. A single tear trailed down her cheek. She opened her eyes.

There was nothing but darkness, the familiar darkness of the metal and wires that surrounded her. She was intensely afraid until she heard a familiar voice. "Hold tight, Devon. We're going to cut you out of this."

A buzzing sounded near her ear. It was the sound of a sophisticated laser drill that began to cut through the connections and forever destroyed the intricate circuitry of the Program. She wanted to cringe as the wires were pulled from her head, but then realised that she was still strapped into the body suit. There was no pain - of course Danziger had considered that - and she felt as if...as if...she were *finally* being cut free.

The visual projectors were lifted from her face, and she could see again. It was her second awakening in this room of horror, but this time, it was more like birth into a new life. She watched with an inner calm as Morgan and Kassidy removed the suit and then, her body shaking, Devon stood up.

She looked around, nervous for a moment, but then she saw John Danziger and knew that, somehow, it would be alright. She had a lot to get through, and a lot to deal with, but she knew she could make it now. Especially with new friends beside her.

Devon walked to John, and ignoring the weakness in her arm, she held out her hand in a gesture of greeting. Lifting her eyes to his face, she said her first words as a new person.

"Hello. My name is Devon Adair."

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