Face to Face by Linda FFF

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Face to Face, Part 9
by Linda

As raindrops began to fall from the sky, John Danziger made his way through the night, his path guided by a lumalight, pausing every few minutes to yell out his daughter's name. Every half hour or so, the monotony was broken by the sound of his gear beeping, but Danziger was an expert at ignoring that annoyance. Only the thought of having to fix it later kept him from trashing the damned thing. He knew his friends only wanted to convince him to take a break, and that was something he could not do, not as long as True was out there somewhere on her own.

Cynthia followed him in sympathy, feeling his pain and remembering her own.

"True-girl, where are you?" John wondered aloud. They had been searching all day, covered a lot of territory, yet there was no sign of the 10-year-old.

"We'll find her, Mr. Danziger." Cynthia Adair tried to comfort the man, but his worries were beyond her reach.

"What if it's too late?" He growled, half-swallowing the words, for he feared that she may have met up with a Grendler or some other creature that could easily kill a small thing like True. One thing he had learned on this planet was that even the apparently inocuous creatures could be dangerous as all hell, as witnessed by True's favorite Koba.

"If she's half as determined as her father, she'll be fine," Cynthia smiled. "Remember that she set out with the purpose of making it difficult for you to find her. I remember when Devon did the same thing once as a child. Her father and I had to search half the station to find her. It took us a day and a half. We were frantic. One thing our little girl was, was determined."

"Yeah, well I guess she's done it again," Danziger growled. He had momentarily forgotten about the other part of himself that had disappeared, and now the dull ache that represented Devon's absence was at full throttle once again. "Clearly, some things never change."

"Everything's changed and I don't know what to do."

Walman looked over at his pal Baines and thought about laughing at the man's predicament, but remembered the Magpro the man was carrying (since he was just off guard duty) and merely smiled instead.

"So what exactly is your problem, Baines?"

"She kissed me."

"So?"

"Why'd she do that?"

"Probably to wake you up. She's been sending out signals for a while and you've been too dense to pick up on them. Believe me, I've been jealous."

"Why?"

Walman groaned in frustration. "Look around you, Baines. There's not exactly many opportunities for a love life on G889. Bess' married. Julia's taken. Devon and John belong together and everyone knows it, except them. No competing with that, although I've thought about it. True's a kid. Laura's basically one of the few remaining women and she's made up her mind she wants you. Besides," he grinned. "I've always had a thing for blondes."

"Oh." Baines was still having trouble dealing with the situation. "I don't know what to do."

"What do you want to do? She's not Cecily, you know. Not all women drive you crazy and take you to the cleaners." At Baines' disbelieving look, Walman frowned. "Look, I know the witch hurt you but that doesn't mean you should be celibate for the rest of your life. Since it happened, you've had your head in space, oblivious to women. And I understand that. But you realize you're letting her win. She's still running your life and you haven't seen her for five years -- not to mention a bunch of light years. Heck, she's probably dead by now."

"Thanks. That's exactly what I wanted to hear -- reminders of all the mistakes I've made." Baines stormed off toward his own tent where he could try and sleep to forget this mess and everything having to do with Cecily Simon.

From the mess tent, Magus could see his angry walk across camp, and she sighed to herself.

"A cup of coffee for your thoughts?"

Magus turned around and smiled at Yale as he poured them both steaming hot mugs full of Bess' latest coffee substitute.

"I don't know." Magus sighed.

"I am a good listener." Yale gave her an encouraging smile.

She looked at him for a minute, assessing his fatherly appearance, before posing a question. "Why are men so complicated?"

"I believe we often ask the same thing about women. It is all a matter of perspective."

Magus gave a short laugh and then smiled. "I guess you're right."

"Is there anything specific on which I might be able to enlighten you?"

"I doubt it. Is this in confidence?" Yale nodded as Magus grimaced. "I kissed Baines today and he freaked out. I guess he wasn't interested."

"I would not assume anything. Perhaps he is merely trying to wrestle with his own feelings."

"Since when is 'wrestling' defined as getting so far away from the cause that you can't even see her any more? Since we got back to camp, he's been as far away from me as he could get."

"Perhaps you should give him some time. Emotions are complicated."

Magus smiled wanly at Yale. "Mine, as well as his."

"What do you think you're doing, Alonzo?"

Magus and Yale looked up, silenced, as Julia followed Alonzo into the mess tent.

"I can't sleep, anyway. I might as well go out there and see if I can help John and Cynthia. Either that, or convince them to take a break while I search."

"We all agreed. We need to rest. We're not going to do True, Devon or anyone else much good if we're suffering from exposure and exhaustion."

"All the more reason I should get out there and try and get John to come back and dry off for a while. You know he's not going to do that if no one's out there searching for True. And Devon will be spitting angry if she comes back to find he has pneumonia."

Julia nodded unhappily, feeling trapped somehow by her own arguments.

"I will go with you, Alonzo."

"Thanks, Yale. See, I won't be alone, Julia. Yale'll take good care of me."

Together the two men gathered some supplies and set off into the rain. As they left the mess tent, Heller and Magus exchanged a look.

"Men." Julia sighed in frustration.

"I completely agree." Laura laughed.

In the cave in the woods, Devon held True to her as they both slept. Earlier Devon had gone out and brought back wood to keep the fire going, but she had to keep it small because the wood was wet, and therefore didn't burn very well. She couldn't tell if the cold compresses were working, and every time True cried out in fear from her nightmares of loneliness, an ache went through Devon's heart. Tired from her worries and unwilling to let go of the frightened young girl, they slept together -- the warmth of Devon's body acting as an extra blanket for True.

Suddenly, Devon found herself alone in the woods. She could hear True calling out to her, but she could not find her. She searched behind trees, in caves, taking different paths but she couldn't find her. "Devon. Devon." She could hear the young girl's cry. "True." She called back, but there was no sign of the voice's source. "I love you, True. It's going to be OK," Devon promised, although she was frightened and scared herself at the surreal nature of the experience and her inability to find John's daughter. Once in a while she would hear True's call, but as she searched she could never find its source.

All at once, the scenery changed and Devon was on a beautiful beach. She took two steps forward and saw the small group on the beach. She saw herself in John Danziger's arms and she was stunned speechless. She stood stock still on the beach, taking in the very unexpected sight until she heard his unkind words to his daughter, telling her to get lost, that he and that duplicate of herself were happy as a couple and didn't need her. Those words got her past stunned and into furious.

"True, that's not right. It's not real," Devon called out. But the girl did not hear her. Devon tried to advance closer, although each of her feet felt like it was dragging a 50-pound weight. "True, I love you and your dad loves you. This isn't real."

"You're just a foolish little girl and we don't want to take care of you anymore." Devon was shocked at the words coming out of her double's mouth and she wanted to cry, for she shared True's pain and anger. "Go away and find your own way in life. We don't want you. We don't love you."

"True, listen to me." Unable to bear any more, Devon called out once again and suddenly the threesome on the beach turned toward her.

"What's going on?" John asked, although Devon was unwilling to think of this stranger as John. "Who are you and why do you look like my beloved Devon?"

"Who are you?" Devon replied defiantly. She kneeled down and looked True in the eye. "Sweetheart, I don't know what's going on here, but this is not me and this is not your Dad. We both love you and Uly more than anything else, and we would never leave you behind."

"But we saw you." True looked from one Devon to the other with an expression of confusion.

"Saw me what?" Devon's focus was the little girl.

"Look, this is ridiculous," the other Devon spoke up. "Who gives a flying fig? We're here in New Pacifica and we don't need any of you. We've got each other."

"Shut up!" Devon spoke sharply to her other self. "True, honey, what'd you see?"

"You kissed him in the comm tent." The girl spat out the words and took off at a run up the beach.

"I'm getting too old for this," Devon mumbled to herself before she went chasing the 10-year-old, leaving behind the mysterious doubles who went back to frolicking in the sea's froth, unable to care about anyone other than themselves. It took her only a few minutes to catch up with True, although neither was used to running on the shifting surface of the warm sand.

"True, yes, we kissed. Yes, we care about one another." Devon once again looked the youngster in the eye. "But that doesn't mean that we will ever stop caring about you. You are your Dad's number one priority. You're pretty high up there on my list, too. And that will never change."

"But what if you get married and want to get rid of us?" True eyed her suspiciously.

"That won't happen. We would never want to get rid of you. If your Dad and I were ever to decide to do something like that, and I'm not saying we are, than you and Uly would be a big part of that. We would be a family. We would all love one another."

"But what about them?" True looked back at the other Devon and her Dad, who were still kissing without a care in the world.

"They aren't real. C'mon," Devon grinned. "Can you really picture your Dad calling my something like 'his beloved Devon?' I don't think so, True. He would have said something like 'You look like that crazy Adair woman.' "

In spite of herself, True laughed.

"True, there's something important that you have to know. The heart's a big thing. And there's room in it to love lots of people. I can love you and Uly and Yale and a lot more people besides. And it doesn't make my love for any one of you less than it was. There's always room for more."

"Like my Dad." True said, suddenly matter-of-fact in her attitude.

"Yeah, I guess so." Devon tried to be noncommittal, although she knew the girl spoke the truth.

As the two women slept, a Terrian rose from the ground to survey their physical figures and then sunk back into the Earth, and reported the results of the efforts the tribe had sanctioned for the two lost souls.

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