First Spat by Bernice Low

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First Spat (2/3)
By Bernice Low

Morgan ambled back to the tent after his lunch, grinning to himself as he imagined what Alonzo was up to. Probably trying to put into effect a desperate strategy. Morgan had a vision of Alonzo dashing around, trying to earn brownie points from Julia and the rest of the female colonists in the hope of reversing his fortunes. He thanked the stars that he would never be put in a position like Alonzo - no, he knew better than that. He would never dare do what Alonzo had done. He shuddered to imagine what Bess might do to him if she ever caught him in a moment of mental infidelity - a mini guillotine floated before his eyes but he quickly banished it aside.

Not that he would ever consider doing so he thought, quickly neutralising any residual thoughts of infidelity from his brain.

No, he was happy with his lot. Anyways, he didn't particularly find any of the other females his type. Devon - while an attractive woman, was a little too bossy for him. Julia - too serious and ugh, Council material. Morgan much preferred to spend his time fantasising about apple pie a la mode and gigantic Mississippi mud pie with a side order of hot fudge sundae than some bit of female fluff.

He felt himself drooling - perhaps a quick VR session before his usual afternoon nap. He ducked into his tent and pulled out his VR set. Lovingly his hands ran over the sleek eyepiece, the seductive curves of the headset - he couldn't imagine life on this planet without it. He pulled the headset over his head and adjusted the eyepiece. "Initiate programme..." Morgan ordered. And immediately a vision of splendour appeared before his eyes.

"Ah yes...." Morgan was breathless with anticipation. He slowly approached the table. Gently he reached out to touch the cris-cross lattice of the apple pie nearest to him - his fingers running over the just right texture of the pastry.

"Oh my..." he exhaled as he saw the perfect cheesecake, topped with plump blueberries and a generous portion of whipped cream. But next to it was a far more sumptuous specimen.

"Aren't you a sly one.." cooed Morgan as he stooped to get a closer look at the banoffee pie that was coyly hiding behind the large tub of slightly softened vanilla ice cream and a mountain of juicy strawberries. He picked up the knife and gently cut through the layers of cream, banana and caramel - slicing a perfect one eight portion. He lingered over it's wonderful aroma. He decided to do a turn of the table before he pounced. He dipped his finger into the still warm pot of creme brulee - the caramelised sugar done to perfection - and sighed with ecstasy.

The chocolate mousse next to it looked delectable and seductively beckoned. But how could he when he had yet to explore the virgin territory of the darkly mysterious chocolate cake that sat on the end of the table which he had no doubt held untold pleasures.

Decisions, decisions, decisions - which lovely dessert would he ravish first?

After much dithering, he decided on the banoffee pie. Picking up his sterling silver fork, he gently picked up a portion - he watched, fascinated as it began it's journey to his mouth...

Suddenly, there was a screech as Morgan found himself very rudely being dumped from VR back to the reality.

"Morgan Martin! What are you doing?" he heard his wife's voice. "Nothing dear - just a little bit of VR.." he stammered out, worried by the accusatory tone in her voice. "Then why are you drooling?" demanded his wife.

Before Morgan could say another word, she had pulled on the headset and was checking out his programme. Morgan quaked as he saw the tiny little veins on the side of her head look like they were going to explode - oh hell, this was a big one.

"Is there something wrong with my cooking Morgan?" asked his wife in a tone that indicated not only was she angry, but she was on the verge of going ballistic, as she whipped the VR set off.

"Absolutely not dear - you know you're the best cook.....ummm.... on this planet." Morgan said, choosing his words carefully so as to not lie either for Bess never liked it when he lied in praise.

"Then why do you need all this? " his wife said, shaking the VR headset at him in fury. Morgan felt terribly confused - Bess never complained about his VR before and she knew that he indulged in it all the time.

"But sweet pea - you've never objected before.." he said, timidly when he felt that it was safe to speak.

"That was before I started cooking in the kitchen and making dinner. Do you realise just how long I spend slaving over that hot pot, using primitive - yes primitive even by Earth standards - methods to produce food so that we can keep going? Do you know how much time I devote to making the measly stuff that I get given taste palatable? Have you any idea how hard it is to think up of something decent to do with food that I have no knowledge of? And now, I find you, with...." she spat out the words "...this..this fantasy of yours...indulging behind my back..."

"But dearie..." Morgan started to protest.

"Don't you dearie me - all you men are the same. If it's not women, it's some other fantasy. But my husband fantasises about food - on VR! This is what I get for marriage, love and devotion - a husband who prefers to look at black forest gateau than spend time with his wife."

"Now sweetheart - that's not true..." Morgan started to deny. He would never chose black forest gateau over his wife - he didn't even like black forest gateau.

"Other men look at females in various stages of the undress! Not my husband. He goes for chocolate layered cake instead! How the hell am I supposed to compete with banoffee pie!! For god's sakes if it was a woman - at least I could compete - but banoffee pie?" shrieked Bess. Morgan simply cowered in a corner and waited for the bombs to stop falling.

"Well - what do you have to say for yourself?" demanded his wife. Morgan knew that he would be a fool to try and plead not guilty when all the evidence was before the judge, jury and possibly, executioner. He'd be better off admitting guilt and pleading for mitigation - though whatever Bess had on her mind, it had to be bad, mitigation or no mitigation.

"Sweetie - I'm so sorry - it was senseless - utterly stupid - moronic even. I promise you I won't ever do it again - not unless you let me that is. In future, I shall only look at nubile women during VR." he grovelled.

"Are you saying that I'm old and over the hill now? Is that it?!" Bess asked, in a dangerously low voice.

"No! No! Of course not sweetie - you're still as beautiful as the day I married you - you don't look a day over....err...." Morgan felt himself struggling as his wife's stare narrowed on him - it was sink or swim. "....over...over.. 29.." he finished.

Bess was silent momentarily - Morgan said a silent prayer, in the hope that this was the end. What the hell was happening? His wife was normally a sweet tempered docile woman - she hardly ever got mad at him. Now, it was like being in Pompeii when Velsuvius erupted.

"Sweetie?" he ventured, timidly but Bess ignored him. She contemptuously dropped the VR set on the ground, turned her heel and wordlessly walked out with her husband staring after her.

***

"Danziger?" Devon called as she reached the vehicle pool - or what she liked to think of as the vehicle pool.

"I'm under here.." a voice drifted up from under the TransRover.

Devon walked over to the TransRover and saw a pair of tatty jeans clad legs sticking out from the underside of the vehicle. "Danziger..." she began but was interrupted.

"Hand me that Number 7 hexagonal wrench will you..." a gruff voice said as a hand shot out from under the vehicle in expectation. Devon knelt down and poked about in the toolbox that was beside the vehicle. Picking up a heavy metal wrench that had the number seven engraved on it, she handed it to Danziger.

"Is that the right one?" she asked and got a grunt of approval. "Danziger..." she began.
"Yeah? Damn!" she heard him curse as something dropped with a clang from under the vehicle Devon debated how she would approach the issue.
"John..."
"If this is about when we're moving again Adair - I've decided to leave the decision to you. I'm sure you'll know when's the right time for us to get started again." Danziger said, as he concentrated on tightening the bolt without spilling any more oil on himself.

"Really?" Devon asked, incredulous. She had expected a long tirade from Danziger about time wasting and getting a move on. But Devon felt that the last hike had been a particularly long one and that perhaps a slightly longer rest stop was necessary. The site they were camped at was ideal - shaded, close to water and Bess was having some success with producing edible foods out of the local vegetation.

"Yeah...yeah - I think every body needs a break - the kids are really tired out. Vehicles can always do with a longer stop anyway. Gives me a chance to do some proper maintenance rather than the one day miracles I have to perform." he said dryly as he slide out from underneath the vehicle smoothly and got to his feet.

"Great." Devon said, unsure of what else to say. She couldn't believe this - Danziger and her were actually agreeing on something for a change.
"OK." Danziger said, as he wiped his hands on a rag.

"You've missed a bit." Devon said, noticing a small splotch of oil that had landed on his tanned face.

"Yeah? Where?" Danziger turned to look into the rear view mirror of the TransRover.

"Here - let me do it." Devon offered. She picked up a rag and Danziger bent slightly as she dabbed at the spot.

"Got it?" he murmured.

"I think it's stuck..." Devon muttered, as she exerted a little more force on his cheek. Involuntarily, her fingers brushed against his jaw, tingling where they rubbed with his rough stubble - Devon Adair felt a moment of weakness but it disappeared just as rapidly as it came on her.She concentrated on getting the stubborn oil spot out. Danziger laughed softly as she rubbed the spot.

"Got it." she announced as the spot finally came off. "Thanks.." he said gruffly as he straightened up. There was a curious moment of silence between them - Devon felt strangely awkward, then realised that she was still clutching the rag in her hands. She had come prepared for a fight - and instead, here they were, actually being nice to each other. It was, well, odd.

"You know Adair - it's not always going to be a fight to persuade me." he said intuitively, as he bent to replace his tools in the toolbox.

"Force of habit perhaps.." she mumbled as she watched him methodically pack the toolbox.

"I guess I better get cleaned up." he mused to himself as he looked at his oil splattered shirt.

"I could do with a bath too actually..." reflected Devon as she felt the sweat trickle down her collar from standing in the afternoon heat.

"Is that an offer?" Danziger said.

Her eyebrows shot up as she turned to look at him. "What?" she choked. To her horror, she had a vision of Danziger bathing in the stream.

"You know Devon - an offer to show me where this stream you ladies go to. The one with the waterfall." he said, looking at her.

"Oh - that." Devon felt mildly relieved. But the vision didn't go away.

"I don't think Julia and Alonzo will be there somehow.." Danziger said, seemingly misinterpreting her concern.

"Uh - there seems to be something going on there." she said neutrally. Drat the man, she cursed inwardly, she really couldn't get rid of the sight of him in the stream- much less the waterfall.

"Yeah...." Danziger said quietly as they started to walk back to the camp. "So - are you going to show me this place?" Danziger pressed as they neared his tent.

"Meet me here in twenty minutes.." Devon heard herself saying.

"Great.." Danziger exclaimed and ducked back into his tent, leaving Devon standing in the hot afternoon sunshine to appreciate the full force of what she had just offered.

***

Devon wandered to the communal area of the campsite, debating what could possibly be the cause of her curious behaviour. As she passed by, she noticed that Bess, Julia and Magus were sitting together on the log for the lunch while Alonzo, Morgan and the rest of the men were sat in another corner. Drifting past Bess and Julia, she heard Bess ranting on about Morgan's foray to VR.

"How the hell does he expect me to compete with some cream pie?" Bess muttered viciously.

"Men - can't be trusted.." snorted Magus.

"I was there listening to him seducing her..." Julia murmured, sounding depressed. "Don't worry Julia - we girls stick together." Bess assured her. "A couple of nights out in the doghouse is what they need to teach them a good lesson." she said seriously. "Believe me - I've been there. Once I caught Morgan getting an eyeful of this girl in a restaurant - why, he was practically drooling before me at this ridiculously endowed girl... I soon got it through to him that I wasn't going to tolerate this behaviour. You have to put your foot down Julia." Bess lectured sternly.

Devon decided that she would give this discussion a miss when Bess spotted her. "Devon - have you heard what Alonzo did?" Bess demanded.

"I heard..." Devon said slowly. "I think we need to take a unified stand on this." Bess stated. Julia and Magus looked at her expectantly.

Devon felt herself squirm under their glance. They'd probably lynch her if they heard what she was about to do - hell, under any other circumstances, she'd probably lynch herself. She didn't mind making the point to Alonzo and Morgan - but she really didn't see the point in extending it to the other `non-offenders' including Danziger. What am I talking about? she shook her head. As it was, her luck would persist on a lousy streak.Danziger sailed into the area, clearly looking for her.

"Devon - are we going?" he said in his loud booming voice. Devon wished she could just crawl into the nearest hole as all the women turned to look at her, their eyebrows raised in surprise.

"Uh....yeah - Danziger and I are going to check out the water supply." Devon lied.

"And the water temperature..looks like a great day for a dip.." Danziger added, to Devon's horror.

To add to her precarious position, he draped his arm casually across her shoulder. Devon could feel herself toasting under the unrelenting stares of her fellow females.

"I guess we better go.." she murmured weakly, unable to look Bess in the eye suddenly. Before anything else happened, she dragged Danziger off.

"Something damned weird is going on here.." muttered Julia testily as she stomped off to find something, anything to occupy herself.

***

Her head reeling from the turn of events, Devon was amazed she managed to guide Danziger to the nearby waterhole that Bess had found on her one of her `jungle jaunts'. It was an ideal bathing spot - the nearby waterfall fed fresh cool water into a pool beneath the rocks. The clear water showed the smooth pebbles that lined the bottom of the waist high pool. Large rocks surrounded the pool, forming a natural rim which allowed the lazy bather to lean against them and enjoy their dip.

"You ladies really do know how to keep a secret.." mused Danziger as he dropped his towel and sunglasses in a heap on a large rock. He sat down and started to take his boots off. Devon had intended to simply show him the place and leave, but she was so pre-occupied with her thoughts that she simply stood at the edge of the pool, staring out into space, until a loud splash startled her from her reverie.

She watched Danziger wade to the far side of the pool and settle there. Suddenly, her vision returned to her, except this time, it wasn't just in her head - before her very eyes was John Danziger, skinny dipping.

He looked exactly like what she imagined him to look, his longish blonde hair plastered to his head.... Stop, she told herself mentally. This is really ridiculous. I spend ninety percent of my time arguing with this man, I can't get on with him - what the hell am I doing fantasising about him with nothing on?

"Hey Devon.." she heard Danziger call. Gritting her teeth, she turned around to face him, keeping her eyes consciously averted on a scrap of moss on the rock above Danziger's head.

"Yes?" " Why don't you come in? The water's great..." he yelled over the roar of the waterfall.

"No..I really don't think John...no..." she began but he interrupted her.

"You look all hot and bothered standin' up there in the sun....come on in...you look like you could do with cooling off.."

When she didn't give him an answer, to her horror, he swam over to her side of the pool. Resting his hands on his chin, his blue eyes regarded her with a cheeky expression.

"Come on Devon - I'm not going to bite you.." he said, his blue eyes smiling at her. That is the least I'm worried about, Devon thought as she found herself unable to not look down at him. While the ripples from his movement distorted the water surface,she could still see enough of him that didn't leave much to the imagination.

"I didn't bring a change of clothes.." she babbled only to find him splashing cold water all over her jeans.

"Devon - I may be a mechanic, but I'm going to be gentlemanly about this OK? I'm going to swim over to the far side and turn my back. If I don't hear a splash in about 30 seconds, I'm going to personally pull you in the water myself..." he said simply.

"Ready?"

Without waiting for a reply, he ducked back down into the pool and began to swim to the far side. Devon watched [among other things] as he easily traversed the length of the pool and popped up on the other side. True to his word, he kept his back to her all the time.

"You got thirty seconds Adair - 30,29,28,27...." he started.

Devon panicked. It briefly occurred to her that she could make a run for it now. Undoubtedly she'd be able to make her way back to the camp faster since she didn't have to put her clothes and boots back on, like Danziger. Assuming that he would stop to do that in the first place - but being chased through the woods by a nude John Danziger?

To her surprise, Devon found herself imagining it with little difficulty.

"I'm down to 25 Adair... 24,23, 22...."

What would the others say if they found out she had gone skinny dipping with Danziger? They'd crucify her - hell knows why Julia, Bess and all the other women were behaving like rabid Suffragettes overnight. The only thing raging in her were her hormones and she felt like a teenager again - except Danziger was so obviously a man rather than some high school boy.

"..I don't hear a splash yet Devon....17,16...time's running out..15,14..." he growled.

This is madness she thought. I'm just going to turn around and walk out of here. He's not going to come chasing after me, he's not going to throw me into that pool with all my clothes on, he...he...he wouldn't dare!

"..10,9,8...I'm coming to get you...7,6,5...three seconds to go..."

The birds chirping on the nearby trees stopped briefly as a loud splash echoed around the forest.

Then they started singing again.

***

Devon was folding up blankets and tidying things in her tent when her son walked in quietly. " Hey Champ.." she said, when she noticed him. He wore a slightly glum expression.

"Mom - what's going on?" he asked, puzzled. Devon stopped her tidying, sat down on the bed and beckoned her son over.

"I don't know son. It's weird isn't it?" she murmured as she hugged him tightly in her arms and kissed the top of his head.

"True doesn't want to play with me anymore. She says she can't - because I'm a boy." he confided in his mother - his tone confused.

"Oh sweetheart - it's not because she doesn't like you for who you are - it's just that things, well, things are a little bit funny at the moment - and nobody really knows why. It's going to get better and then you and True will be the best of friends again." Devon said, hoping she sounded optimistic and cheery.

"Really?" his eyes brightened up and Devon saw traces of a smile at the corner of his lips.

"Really Champ." she assured him as she hugged him again. "Now, why don't we get some dinner?" she asked as she smoothed the curls on his head.

"OK - but I won't eat any of that yukky mash squishy stuff that Bess made yesterday." Uly stated firmly.

"We'll see about that young man.." Devon said, pretending to be stern before the two of them headed off to find their dinner.

Dinner that night was a constrained affair with the camp well divided into the men, and the women. It was an even more trying affair for Devon and Danziger, who soon discovered that they were the ONLY two people of the opposite sex who were still speaking to each other.

Relaxed from his swim, Danziger ambled up Bess, his plate in his hand and was shocked at the force in which she deposited his dinner on his plate. She practically threw it onto his plate, seemingly uncaring where it landed. It took quick reflexes from the mechanic to tighten his grip on the wobbling plate and stop his food from landing in the mud - not that it would have made much difference, Danziger reflected. The mash had the consistency and texture of G889 topsoil. Danziger was about to open his mouth to ask why she was being so nasty, but decided not to say anything when he caught the glare which Bess had fixed on him. Something very strange was going on, he thought as he moved away. Bess was looking at him as if he was lower than pond scum.

He picked up a fork and carried his plate over to where Morgan, Alonzo and the other men were huddled. Sitting himself down on a dead log, he picked up a forkful of mash and regarded it with scepticism. "What the hell is this goop anyway?" he said out loud, directing his question at no one in particular.

"Sssssshhhhhhhhhh...." spat a unison of voices at him and Walman nudged him with his elbow.

"What?" Danziger inquired, looking puzzled. "Have you got a death wish Danziger?" Morgan whispered furiously at him. "For god's sakes, just eat it OK? You don't want to attract any more attention from *her*" he hissed.
"Morgan - what the hell are you talking about?" Danziger asked. "Bess and the rest of the women have gone completely nuts - I don't know why but they've just turned completely hostile. You don't want to upset them anymore than is necessary." Morgan explained. "Whaddaya mean they've gone nuts?" Danziger was puzzled "You moron - it's some female... I don't know... hormonal thing...maybe it's this planet...maybe it's the moons - I don't know. Whatever it is, I don't want to know what they're capable of doing if we get them mad enough...and they are mad.." Morgan declared, before shovelling mash into his mouth at top speed.

Danziger put his plate and fork down. "Look - I'll just go over and talk to Devon and I'm sure whatever it is, we can get it worked out. It's probably just something that's blown way out of proportion... hey, you and Julia will be back together no time..." Danziger announced, slapping Alonzo on the back. He started to stand up but Walman and Baines pulled him back down.

"Guys - this is really getting ridiculous." Danziger said dryly. "Yeah - well we're just trying to save your skin buddy.." Baines told him pointedly. "If you go over there - there's no telling what might happen to you."

"It's not like I'm going to be attacked by them. Morgan - I don't know what you've done to offend Bess - I don't know what Alonzo's done - but I haven't done anything..." Danziger stated.

"This isn't about what you've done or we've done Danziger..this is way bigger than that - this is men are the enemy - men are scum..." Alonzo said, looking up from the ground.

Danziger - get this in your head - we're not worthy. We're expendable - we're only good for breeding purposes. Keep repeating it to yourself and maybe you'll come out of this physically intact.." Morgan snapped.

Danziger started to laugh. "That's the biggest pile of hogwash I've ever heard coming out from a Government Liaison's mouth in a long time..." he said between guffaws. "Aren't you guys taking this a little too seriously?"

"Oh yeah smartguy?" he looked Danziger in the eye." Then tell me why Uly is coming to sit over here while his mother sits with Bess and her band of merry women? which incidentally includes your daughter?"

Danziger abruptly stopped laughing as he noticed Uly walked over with his plate and sat down in between Alonzo and himself. "Hey Champ..." Danziger said, trying to keep his tone light.

"Mister Danziger.." Uly greeted him slowly and started to eat his food. Danziger couldn't help but notice the glum expression on his face.

"Why didn't you go over and sit with your mom..?" he asked softly. Uly played with the mash on his plate idly.

"She said I'd better come and sit over here with you. Mr Danziger - is True angry with me?" he asked, his eyes serious as he looked at Danziger.

"Well, errrr.. I don't know Uly." he answered honestly. "Oh." Uly sounded disappointed. "Is she mad at you?" he asked next. Danziger hesitated. "I hope not." he said carefully.

"Is my mom mad at you?" he asked, not bothering to look up this time - almost anticipating a negative response.

Finally a question he could answer positively, thought Danziger. "I don't think so Champ. We had a real good time this afternoon.." Danziger grinned at the little boy. He failed to notice the strange looks he was getting from the other men. "Yeah - I guessed that." Uly said nonchalantly. "She seemed like she had a good time too.." he remarked as he poked at the mash.

"Well, I guess somebody will survive this ..." Morgan remarked gloomily before sighing at the prospect of a night in a tent shared with Alonzo and Walman. Between Alonzo's dreaming and Walman's teeth grinding, things were going to be just swell.

End of Part 2.

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