Danzinger's ghost by Katherine Tate

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Danziger's Ghost, Part 2
by Katherine Tate

Julia sat in her tent staring at the body of John Danziger. All the festive feelings of the night before were gone as the group was shocked and grieving. Was there anything, anything I could have done? Julia wondered. There must have been something . . . If only they weren't stuck on this godforsaken planet! If only she could have gotten him to a hospital. If only . . .

After all that they'd been though, after all her training, her special chromosomes and she still couldn't save one man. One very important man.

Alonzo entered and looking at her expression he figured he knew what she was thinking. He came over and rubbed her shoulders. After a moment he brought his eyes to John's body.

"Julia. That rock broke his back. He was probably dead before the ground stopped shaking."

"I know." Julia responded without emotion. "But that doesn't mean I don't feel like there should have been something I could do for him. For True. Something." He moved in to hold her and rocked her gently.

True had been hysterical and Julia had to give her a sedaderm to get her calm and sleepy. Now she slept, an unhappy frown on her young face. Devon watched her sleeping and felt nothing.

John was dead and she felt . . . nothing. This wasn't right at all. Someone else entered the tent. Without turning Devon knew that it was Yale.

"Ah, True." he sighed, "It is going to be very hard for her."

"Yes." Devon agreed. "But she's not alone. She's not unloved." Yale stroked Devon's back.

"And you?" he asked. Devon wouldn't look at him.

"I don't know what you mean."

"John was 'the most annoying person' you had ever met. He was also your friend. It is natural to feel pain."

Was that what she was feeling? No, she was too numb to feel anything at this point. It was too soon. Every time she closed her eyes she was back in the cave looking down at Danziger's bleeding head. It was a disturbing, painful image.

"Oh, Yale. What are we going to do without him?" she asked. He didn't answer.

Uly had never been this close to a dead body before. When O'Neill had died (the first time) he hadn't gotten a good look. Now Uly stood just inches away from Danziger. He looked as though he was asleep. Except for the blood on his head.
And his skin was all white. And he wasn't breathing.

Uly cautiously reached out a hand and touched Danziger's face. He remembered last night, by the fire; Danziger had put his arm around Uly while telling his story. That was the way Uly thought of Danziger; with his strong arms around you. He remembered Danziger picking him up and carrying him on that first day of travel. It was weird to think that he was no longer alive. His skin was cold; not at all like the warmth of his arms as Uly remembered them.

Uly thought he could almost hear Danziger's voice tell that story of last night. It had been a really scary one, about a man whose enemies had buried him alive. Then the dead man came back to haunt them in their dreams until they confessed to their crime. Somehow it was easier not to be afraid snuggled next to Danziger. Morgan, on the other hand, had been quite freaked out. Uly guessed that maybe Bess wasn't as comforting as Danziger could be.

Uly had heard Morgan challenge Danziger afterwards, telling him that it wasn't appropriate to tell children a story like that, especially after what happened to O'Neill. Danziger's voice rang in Uly's head.

"Morgan, if my story scared you that much then you need a good dose of reality."

"Oh, that's easy for you to say, but what about the children?"

"Your concern for the kids is overwhelming." Danziger had responded sarcastically, "But the kids took it as it was meant to be - a *story*, nothing more."

"Uly." Devon whispered. "What are you doing?" Slowly Uly turned around and walked to his mother's outstretched hand. He noticed she didn't even look at John.

"I just wanted to see him." he said as they left the tent. Devon walked him to the edge of the camp and squatted down to his eye level.

"Uly, it's normal to feel sad when we lose a friend like this . . ."

"He was my friend too." Uly said. Devon nodded and stroked his cheek. He was so serious.

"I know, I know. But there something else we have to think of and that is . . ." Here Devon hesitated. She really didn't know quite what to say.

"True." Uly said. "We have to think about True." How did he become so wise? Devon wondered. She felt like Uly was more in control than she was right now.

"That's right. She's going to be feeling very lost and lonely now and we have to make sure she's loved and cared for even without her Dad."

"I know that I'd feel real bad without you, Mom." Uly said, his eyes watering a little. "I never should have let her go back to cave. I knew where she was going and I didn't stop her. There was something bad in that cave. I felt it. I should have stopped her." Devon wiped away his tears and tried to calm him.

"Shhh. This isn't anyone's fault Uly. It was an accident."

Alonzo felt himself being pulled into the dream. He didn't really feel like communicating with the terrians; he was hoping the blankness of sleep would block out the shock of losing his friend. However, he also didn't have the energy to refuse entry to the dream plane and so he found himself facing three terrians who seemed more agitated than he had ever seen them. They were standing high on a cliff above the cave where Danziger had been found. Danziger lay, as though sleeping, at the feet of the terrians. Alonzo looked away. Why had they brought him here?

As usual they didn't come right out and tell him what they wanted to say. In fact, they seemed even less focused than normal.

"What do you want?" Alonzo asked, perplexed and unhappy.

"Sadness. Sorrow." One of them indicated to him. Alonzo looked down at his feet.

"Yes." he finally responded. This created even more agitation between them. Alonzo had never seen the terrians behave this way.

"Wrong. Mistake." Was all he could distinguish from their garbled communication. Then he was simply asleep. He did not dream for the rest of the night.

They group gathered in the morning at a spot near the camp to bury John Danziger. It was an emotional time. Even Morgan, who never saw eye-to-eye with John, was utterly miserable. Bess wept openly. Baines and Walman were somberly considering what the loss of their friend would mean to their responsibilities to the group. Alonzo was concerned for Julia; and also thinking of the void John's death had created. His dream from the night before had disturbed him, but he couldn't make heads or tails of it. Julia couldn't help but feel guilty. As the doctor it was her position to make sure no one died.
The fact that it had been out of her control didn't comfort her at all. All she kept hearing were the voices of Devon and True, especially True, begging her to help him. Devon wrapped her arms around Uly, trying to draw some strength from the contact with him. She was also worried about True. John's daughter stood apart from everyone, at the foot of the grave. She didn't move, or speak, or cry.

Yale prayed for John, and for the group, and threw the first handful of dirt into the grave. True flinched at the sound. The group slowly moved away and Zero came forward, silently for once, to finish filling in the dirt. True watched for a moment and then ran off.

Devon watched True's departure anxiously. She bit her lip.

"Do you think we should leave her alone?" she asked Julia.

"Give her a bit of space." Julia suggested. "If she's not back in a little while, I'll go after her."

"Thanks Julia." Devon gave her arm a bit of a squeeze. Julia found she could not respond.

Devon had decided that the group should move on instead of remaining here for the promised R&R. The further away from the tragedy the better. Unfortunately, in servicing the solar panels, Danziger had dismantled them from the vehicles. Walman and Baines estimated it would take them several hours to reattach them. If Devon had any thoughts on how quickly Danziger may have been able to do the job she wisely kept them to herself. They agreed to leave at dawn the following day.

True was dreaming. In her dream her Dad was still alive but he was trapped somewhere. She had this feeling of great urgency. She had to help him. She had to get him out. She had to hurry. Where was he?

"True!" he called to her from far away.

Abruptly, True's eyes flew open. The nightmare had left her pulse racing and she tried to steady her breathing. She glanced over at her Dad . . . and saw Uly and Devon instead. What were they doing in here?

True sat up on her cot and took in the rest of the tent. This wasn't her tent; this was the Adairs' tent. Why was she here?

Then, out of the fuzziness of sleep, sharp reality took hold. She was here because Dad was dead; they'd buried him yesterday morning. And now they were going to move on and leave him behind. True felt sick to her stomach.

She suddenly remembered her dream. Dad trapped somewhere. Dreams on this planet were very important. They almost always meant something. What if her dream was telling her that Dad was trapped?

True quickly stood up, her blood feeling cold. Dad had told a story the other night about someone who had been buried alive. The group had buried Commander O'Neill and he hadn't really been dead. What if they had done the same thing to Dad? True quietly left the tent.

Devon wasn't sure what caused her to wake up. She had been sleeping restlessly and suddenly she became aware that there was something wrong. Pulling her arm out from under Uly, she sat up to check on True. True was gone.

Alarmed, Devon leapt out of bed and went outside. It was still many hours before dawn and quite dark. Devon could hear True, before she saw her. She was up at Danziger's grave. Digging.

True was so intent on her task she didn't hear Devon's approach.

"True?" Devon asked softly, "What are you doing up here?"

True didn't stop; instead she began to dig at a more frantic pace. Devon knelt down and placed a hand on True's back but the girl pulled out of reach.

"True?"

"Have to get him out. Have to help him." True finally choked out, between sobs. Her face was streaked with tears and mud.

"Sweetie, we can't help him anymore. He's gone." Devon said as gently as she could.

"Nooo." True moaned. "No. I dreamt about him. He's still here somewhere. I have to find him. I have to help him."

Devon reached out now for True's hands. She had to stop this. True cried out but didn't pull away as Devon wrapped her arms around the sobbing girl. She rocked her softly, not knowing how else to comfort. This wound was going to take a long time to heal.

In the early morning the Eden crew pulled up stakes and moved away from what had started out as an idyllic rest spot, and ended with a nightmare. The group was silent. Each person had his own reasons for mourning the loss of Danziger and that loss was proving to be very great indeed. In their grief no one noticed the terrians standing on the cliff over the lake, watching their departure. If they had, they would have seen that the terrians were not alone.

When John awoke he felt like he'd been asleep for a long time. Certainly a lot longer than the few hours he'd intended on being away from camp. He groaned and stretched his arms over his head. Struggling to his feet he made his way down the path towards the camp. Geez, it was quiet!

Rounding the corner he stopped short in shock. His eyes must be deceiving him! Where were they? The tents, the vehicles, the *people* - all were gone! Was he still asleep? Was this some kind of dream?

"Hey!" he shouted, "Hey! True! Devon!" The only response was the echo of his own voice across the lake. John jogged around the old campsite, looking for any clue of where they were, and why they had gone off without him. He couldn't really believe what he was seeing. Maybe he'd pissed Devon off - but come on! No more than usual. And True wouldn't have left him behind without a fight, of this he was certain. No, Devon wouldn't leave him behind; she'd already had opportunity for that and had proven that it was important that the group remain intact. The only time someone had been abandoned had been under extremely difficult circumstances.

He stood in the deserted campsite turning in circles.

"TRUE!" he screamed, "WHERE ARE YOU?!!!!"

He was more confused than frightened and feeling still a little foggy from his sleep. Then something caught his eye. Up on a rise a short distance from where he stood he saw a grave marker. Heart pounding he swiftly moved up the small hill. This grave was new, relatively; and scratched out on the marker he could read quite clearly:

JOHN DANZIGER

Now fear crept in where before confusion reigned. They had left him behind because they had buried him in a grave. My God, how long had he slept anyway? How long ago had they broke camp? And *who* had they put into the ground?

No answers to his questions. Only stillness.

Julia
//We are now 4 days away from Danziger's death and everyone is still paralyzed by it. Simple decisions are hard to make and tempers are short. I'm most worried about Devon and True. Devon, because she has not acknowledged her grief. True, because she's aloof and unresponsive. We are coming to realize what a very big man John Danziger was for all of us.//

"This seems as good a place as any." Devon said wearily, looking around for some confirmation from the others. Some shrugged, others nodded. "Fine. Let's stop here then."

The unloading process took longer than normal. Julia found that her medical tent didn't go up quite as fast. Everyone tried hard but there was nothing to laugh at and no smiles. Morale had sunk to depressive depths as lethargy overwhelmed everyone. Even Alonzo was more pensive than she had ever seen him.

After the evening meal, Julia joined Alonzo by the campfire. There weren't any stories or jokes; just a gathering of people. She slipped an arm around him.

"You OK?" he asked.

"I was about to ask you the same thing." was her response. They both stared at the flames for a bit.

"I think the terrians share our grief." he said suddenly. This surprised Julia.

"Why?"

"I had this dream the night that John died. And I've been having a similar one since. In it they come to me with feelings of sorrow. But it's so undefined, so unfocused. I don't understand what they mean really." he confessed.

"John had no contact with them. Not like you, or Uly." Julia mused, "I wonder why they would feel sorrow at his death."

"Maybe they're just reacting to us. All I know is that it's really depressing me. I wish they'd just cut it out."

"It's gonna take some time." Julia said softly, "He was . . . like family." Even closer, she thought.

"I don't think True's been having the best of dreams either." Alonzo said. Julia was silent. Devon had told her about True's attempt to dig John out of his grave. Psychology wasn't a strong part of Julia's training, but she guessed it was a denial factor that had motivated True that night. Devon had been quite shook up by the experience.

Danziger had filled his canteen in the lake before following the vehicle tracks heading west but he was beginning to suspect the water would be long gone before he caught up to the group. If he caught up with them. Those tracks weren't exactly new; it was his guess that at least 3 or 4 days had gone by already. Under normal conditions he would have thought it easy for a single person to move faster than their ragtag caravan, but he had no food and very little water.

After the first day of travelling he was ranting to himself in the hot sun and he began to wonder if maybe he was really dead after all. Maybe he was just a spirit, a ghost like one of his campfire stories, doomed to wander in the footsteps of his friends but always a day or so behind. But as the heat dried up his throat, and the hunger gnawed his stomach he decided that if this was death, then he was in purgatory - or maybe even Hell.

At night, he dozed rather than slept. He was having bad dreams; dreams about True, dreams about the group. True was very unhappy but he couldn't seem to find her to comfort her. In one dream, she stood before him crying but when he reached out to hold her she disappeared. Danziger's eyes came open. Yes, this was definitely Hell.

True tossed in her sleep, gripped by another nightmare. Her father was walking. Walking just like they all did on their journey except he was alone. She saw him stumble and fall to his knees.

"True!" he called to her, "Where are you? Where did you go?"

She tried to run to him but she couldn't for some reason.

"Dad!" she cried out, "Wait I'm coming! Wait!" But he was disappearing. "Wait! Daddy!"

Devon shook True gently until her eyes opened. She stared up at Devon, unfocused, unseeing.

"True, you were having a bad dream." Devon said gently.

"No." True shut her eyes. Maybe if she fell asleep right away she would find him again. Devon didn't argue with her, but let her roll over. She been alarmed when True had started calling out for Danziger. These dreams were a nightly business.

True wasn't the only one dreaming of Danziger.

In her dream Devon stood in the centre of their campsite by the lake. It was deserted; the tents packed away, the vehicles already disappearing. Clearly, she saw the grave they were leaving behind. It was all that was left. She turned away. This was not a place she wanted to be.

"Devon!" Danziger called. "Don't go!"

Devon turned back to see Danziger standing on the high cliff above the cave. The wind was blowing his hair around and his loose clothing flapped angrily.

"Please, don't leave me behind." he said softly, but she heard him as though he was standing next to her.

Devon hesitated briefly and then turned and started walking towards the group in the distance. When she glanced over her shoulder at the cliff, Danziger was gone.

Uly's dream put him in the circle by the fire listening to Danziger's story. The older man had his arm around him; Uly knew, without looking, that True was on the other side. All of the others sat in rapt attention to Danziger's mesmorizing voice. But Uly did not want to hear the ghost story again. He was more interested in watching the rest of the group. Morgan looked distinctly uneasy. Alonzo was disturbed. Mom seemed lost in thought.

The rest were either focussed entirely on the harrowing words of Danziger's haunting tale, or they had managed to close their expressions.

Suddenly, over the left shoulder of Morgan, Uly thought he could see someone else standing in the shadows. He quickly looked around the group again. Everyone was here already. So who was watching them? Uly watched cautiously, wondering if he should say something. He didn't want to interrupt the story.

Walman leaned forward, slowly, to add another log to the fire. As the flames flared with the additional fuel the circle of light expanded revealing the figure in the shadows. Uly gasped. It was Danziger.

"What do you mean it won't start?" Devon asked, running her hands through her hair in frustration. They were standing next to the TransRover "Why not?"

Walman was a little irritated. Who did she think he was, Mr. Miracle-MakerMan Danziger?

"I don't know." he said, for the fourth time. "It's not starting and I don't know why not."

Baines popped up with a few suggestions that Devon listened to without really hearing, or understanding, and then told them shortly to get to work on it.

"Who does she think she is?" Walman asked, annoyed, as Devon walked away.

"Hey, cut her some slack. She's hurting." Cameron said.

"Yeah, and we aren't?" Walman challenged. "John was just as much my friend and yours and he was hers - more so even. She doesn't have the monopoly on missing him. Besides, " he wiped his forehead with dirty sleeve and sighed, "John would know what to do now, wouldn't he?"

Danziger had decided that he was probably going crazy. His own mind was conspiring against him. He still couldn't imagine what might have happened so that his friends would believe him dead and leave him behind. The last thing he remembered was sleeping in the afternoon sun high on that cliff. Pretty harmless, he thought.

The dreams he was having filled him with visions and feelings of his friends; but left him with no concrete means of communicating with them. These very images that tortured him, frustrated him, also pushed him forward to find the group. He had to find True to tell her he was OK. She believed he was dead and Danziger could clearly imagine how she was coping. Her pain was transmitted to him nightly.

With sick amusement he wondered how the rest of the group was dealing with his demise. His dreams of them hadn't been so clear. Mostly he kept returning to the campfire and the night he'd told the ghost story. He guessed that was because it was the last time the group had all been together.

He wondered, too, how Devon was making out. At least she won't have to worry about someone always arguing with her, he thought. At least Devon will look after True. He could see her in the dream, walking away from him towards the group; leaving him behind. She doesn't know, he told himself over and over, she doesn't know.

He walked constantly, stopping only after the sun set to sleep fitfully. That he hadn't already caught up to the Eden project worried him. A lot. He should be able to move a lot quicker than them.

End Part 2

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