Scar Tissue by Allison McDonnell

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Very few of the members of Eden Advance cared whether John Danziger's amazing feat had been achieved by skill or because of just plain dumb luck. All that mattered was that, only a few minutes after sunset, the mechanic had returned to their winter prison with a knapsack nearly filled to the brim with several varieties of fruit.

The welcome news of Danziger's find had spread through camp like a wildfire. The entire crew had excitedly filed into the meal-tent and waited with baited breath for Julia's tests to affirm that the food was indeed non-hazardous and safe to eat. Just about everyone next watched with rapt attention as Bess and Cameron set out sixteen plates and then lovingly sliced the bounty into equal shares. And best of all, if they were mindful of their portions, it was estimated that there was enough fruit left over for every single one of them to enjoy six more meals. It was almost too good to believe.

For the first time in days, there was a sense of optimism among the group and the air was filled with conversation and laughter as they devoured their tasty supper. However, Devon noted that Danziger was shying away from the general discussion as well as the praise bestowed upon him for his discovery. Instead, he seemed content to sit back and watch his daughter enjoy her first full meal in days. Additionally, Devon found it more than a little odd that John's appetite didn't appear to be as hearty as the others.

"Hey Danziger, you said that there's more where this came from?" Walman yelled to him from a neighboring table, his mouth still half full of food.

Danziger nodded. "Yeah, I tried to grab the ripe ones," he confirmed. "There's some more that should be ready to pick in a few days."

The entire room erupted in jubilation at his announcement that their collective stomachs would remain full for a while longer. Maybe the worst was indeed over, the majority of the crew inwardly surmised. Maybe things were looking up after all.

Throughout the brief exchange and for several seconds afterward, Devon's eyes had remained centered on Danziger. After whispering a few words to Uly, Devon was unable to resist the urge to pick up her plate and relocate to Danziger's table. As she seated herself directly across from him, she confirmed her suspicion that the majority of the mechanic's eating habits appeared to be moving his food around the plate with his fork, yet rarely taking an actual bite. He also didn't seem to be very pleased to see her move in closer proximity to him and he emitted an exhausted sigh when he noticed her presence.

"You're not hungry?" she queried.

There was a several second delay before he shrugged, "I already ate a whole piece of one of those mango-lookin' things on the way back here."

Devon was less than pleased to hear about what she considered to be Danziger's latest act of recklessness by eating an untested food. She was about to take issue with his carelessness, but stopped herself when she studied him a bit more closely. As she'd gotten to know John over the past months, she'd slowly learned many of his mannerisms, some subtle, some definitely not so. And when she observed his tightened shoulders and jaw, paired with the ever-so-slight narrowing of his eyes which all but dared her to contradict him, she could read him as clear as day. He was lying to her.

The leader quickly regrouped her thoughts, as well as her overall approach as to how to best get the truth out of him.

"So you found all of this food in a cave?" she asked, trying a bit too hard to sound casual and, therefore, failing miserably.

Before answering her, Danziger took a healthy bite of fruit, and Devon wondered if he'd possibly done so in order to buy himself some time.

"Yeah."

Several more moments passed and when it was clear that Danziger had no plans to elaborate, Devon pressed, "And... what? They were growing on trees... or on vines?"

John let out another annoyed sigh. To make matters worse, the other conversations in the tent had dwindled into silence in order for the crew to focus in on the pair's discussion.

Jesus shankin' Christ, why can't this woman just let me eat my damn dinner in peace, the mechanic groused to himself.

"Vines," came the eventual stoic reply.

Determined to get him to speak in more than mono-syllables, Devon pushed forward. "Were they deep in a cavern and you just happened to stumble on them? Or were they near the entrance but somehow protected from the cold air? How do these vines grow? I mean, was there light and water there? Did-"

Danziger cut her off mid-sentence. "In a cavern. Far enough in that it's safe from the cold. Growin' along a wall. There was a pool of water next to it and the light came from sunstones," he growled. "Good enough?"

He'd clearly had his fill of what he deemed to be Devon's latest interrogation.

"Jeez," he snorted in disgust, loudly flinging his empty fork onto the table and rocketing to the standing position, his legs forcing the chair backward several feet.

The room had remained quiet throughout their exchange and the air was molasses-thick with tension. Danziger roughly threw on his coat as he began to ready himself to abandon the crew for quieter pastures, or at least somewhere in camp that Devon Adair wasn't. When it came to enduring sub-zero temperatures versus being subjected to the third degree, he'd always choose the former.

Just as he reached the exit, a worried True called out to him. "Dad, you didn't finish your dinner."

Danziger made sure to toss a pointed look in Devon's direction before he replied. "You eat it, True-girl. I lost my appetite."

Without another word, the mechanic burst through the double doors, allowing them to slam to a close behind him as he stalked away into the frigid night. His outburst had all but killed the jovial mood for the Edenites and their meal and subsequent conversation remained subdued for the remainder of the evening. But at least their agonizing hunger pains had now subsided and, as far as most of them were considered, they considered the trade-off to be more than fair.

__________________________________________________

Thanks to the steady diet of fruit, over the next ten days, the crew of Eden Project thankfully grew stronger and returned to good health. However, in sharp contrast, Danziger's overall physical and emotional demeanor conspicuously regressed. Moreover, Danziger's standoffish nature appeared to go into overdrive. He became all but impossible to be around, which mattered little in the long run because he seemed to cut himself off from everyone but his daughter. Without obtaining Devon's approval, he'd commandeered the guard duty roster, altering it drastically by inserting his name for nearly every graveyard shift. Often he'd pull double or even triple sentry duty in addition to his already draining schedule.

If John slept at all, it would be accomplished during the day. However, this new routine in which many of his daylight hours were spent in his personal quarters away from public view or scrutiny, provided him the perfect opportunity to occasionally slip out of camp without notice or permission. True was the only one who was privy to his excursions, but she had been sworn to secrecy.

She wasn't sure where he'd go off to, but he'd return within an hour or so and he'd always come back empty handed. And though the little girl was conflicted about her part in maintaining her father's subterfuge, any inward battle that she'd fought was always won by her loyalty and unwavering trust in him. Plus in turn for her continued silence, she'd extracted John's promise that upon each return, he would sleep for at least six hours. And her father had yet to let her down which relieved her greatly. Because for some reason unknown to her, her Dad was looking tired all of the time now.

When it was time for Danziger to venture off on another public scout to obtain more food, he always insisted on traveling alone and adamantly refused any and all assistance. Devon and the others also found it extremely disconcerting that the mechanic continued his overall evasiveness regarding the physical coordinates of the food source, nor would he take anyone to that specific location. The mechanic used whatever avoidance tactic he had handy to elude the discussion, including sneaking out to forage at unusual hours when no one was around. Often they weren't aware that he'd left until he performed his two hour gear check-in with whomever was scheduled for sentry duty. And he never once failed to bring back a satchel packed solid with two or three day's worth of ripened fruit.

But no matter how grateful Devon was to John for being solely responsible for staving off the life-threatening effects of malnutrition, she could no longer permit Danziger's charade to continue until she received concrete answers which could be personally verified.

It was becoming readily apparent that something was very wrong with him. Despite the replenished provisions, his large appetite had never returned, nor did the weight that he'd previously lost. His skin was alarmingly pale and he appeared haggard and gaunt. Even his normally expressive blue eyes seemed to have less life in them. And his condition was growing worse each day.

Devon's initial anger over John's secretive and what she'd considered to be his childish behavior, was now overshadowed by her concern for his well-being. Though she had her nagging suspicions, she wasn't yet certain as to what was causing his general physical and emotional decline. However, there was one thing that she was absolutely sure of:

Something had to be done.

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