Boundaries by Joan Powers

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"Boundaries", Part 2
by Joan Powers

With her head slumped over leaning against the door of the Trans Rover and her eyes closed, Devon appeared younger and more vulnerable. Her protective barriers afforded by facial expressions and vocal intonations were absent. A softness which she tried to hide from the world was evident. Her shoulder length auburn hair attractively framed her face. Since she was asleep, John took full advantage of the opportunity to study the lines of her chin and cheek bones. Her long lashes. He paused as he took in her full soft lips. He remembered how wonderful those lips had felt against his when he had kissed her.

Devon's recovery had been a slow ongoing process. While the Terrians had healed her and removed all traces of the poison, her body required time to restore itself. During the first days, she rested in the bed of the Trans Rover as they traveled. In the evenings, Bess and Julia had diligently massaged her limbs to stimulate her circulation. For a while, all of Devon's motions were stiff and painful to her. Her physical strength was being restored, but not at the rate that she would have preferred.

Since Devon had rejoined the group, John had been spending quite a lot of time with her. During the days, he took turns riding in the bed of the Trans Rover with her. Evenings, he usually pitched her tent and helped Uly relay her some food. Later, on many nights, he would drop in to check on her after her physical therapy session with Dr. Heller. Ostensibly it was because he was 'acting' group leader and he needed her feedback. He claimed that he wanted to keep her informed about the group's activities.

However, Devon was so weak that he didn't bother to mention several of their problems. Most of them, he and the others had been able to work out between themselves. John felt fiercely protective of Devon and didn't want undue worries to interfere with her recovery.

During his most recent nightly visit to her tent, he had been telling her about the scouting reports. Or was it about the condition of the vehicles? Something like that. They were both sitting on her cot and he had her hand loosely covered with his. That was becoming typical during their visits. As he spoke, he gently moved his thumb over the top of her hand.

Suddenly Devon interrupted him, changing the subject. She cleared her throat uncomfortably as she struggled for her words,

"John....I..I've been meaning to thank you for looking after the group and Uly. You've done a wonderful job." She looked downward, her face was slightly flushed as she attempted to acknowledge her gratitude. "You've done so much for me...I don't know how to pay you back."

As she spoke, she tilted her head towards his. Her eyes met his and he had grinned warmly towards her. In that moment, her defense shields were down, he could see her emotions clearly reflecting in her magical brown eyes. There was genuine gratitude, warmth and....longing? His heart had begun to beat faster as the emotions he himself had only been able to acknowledge for Devon after she had fallen ill, seemed to be mirrored in his beloved's face.

He leaned forward, running the tips of his fingers along the side of her face, from her temple to her cheek. She responded to his touch by turning in towards him to allow his palm to rest against her cheek. Slowly he edged forward and tentatively brushed his lips against hers. The two separated briefly then more confidently returned to meet again. Their lips parted slightly as they began to deepen the kiss. John wrapped his arm about her shoulders to hold her body securely against his. The two began to hungrily explore one another - tasting and touching. The warmth of her body and her growing response to his touch sent a surge of desire coursing through him which was so powerful, it caused him to pull back.

Yet, as he tried to catch his breath he sensed something was wrong. Something had changed - almost instantaneously. Devon's body had become tense - almost rigid. She too was breathing heavily but instead of desire, her eyes had become filled with fear. Her pure terror - like a trapped animal, cooled John's passion. He tried to speak, to make things better but she turned about and softly asked him to leave.

They hadn't spoken about it. And since then she seemed to be avoiding him.

Her reaction had bewildered him. Unable to lie still, he had spent most of that night pacing about the camp, replaying those events in his mind. He hadn't done anything wrong. Their kiss had felt so right. He had been longing to touch her, to kiss her for such a long time. Initially she seemed to be enjoying it just as much as he had. Why did she pull away?

He deduced that Devon was willing to accept his help because she had to - she didn't have a choice. But to let someone into her heart, especially a person of his social standing - that was a different story. He had dealt with prejudice all of his life. Why should he be surprised to encounter it here? Ms. Devon Adair had someone to manage her vehicles, guide her group and even take care of her son. She was a woman who was used to getting what she wanted when she wanted it. She had what she needed from him, she didn't *want* anything more.

Fueled by his anger, he had slammed his fist into the side of the Trans Rover. As he gingerly examined his injured hand, he hoped that the throbbing of his wounded knuckles would serve to dull some of his fury. How could he have been such a fool to think that she could love him?

But her eyes. He hadn't imagined the emotions that he saw in them - had he?

It was evident that she had no recollection of their unusual virtual reality encounter. Somehow the combination of Morgan Martin and the Dream Plane had allowed him to speak to Devon while she was in suspended animation. While their visit had been brief, those sentiments, which he thought he had glimpsed within her earlier that evening, had been in her voice and her expression. She had told him that he meant a lot to her and that she knew she could count on him.

When she had first collapsed, he had managed to suppress his emotions, burying them deep inside of himself. He threw himself into his new duties as group leader and surrogate father to Uly. While he didn't allow himself to think about Devon during the daytime, his efforts to completely block her out of his mind were futile. Nightmares of him discovering her dead body haunted him and grew in their intensity each night. When Devon appeared before him while he was in that bizarre VR program, the grief that he had felt over her absence nearly overwhelmed him. It had forced him to face his feelings for her.

As he finally collapsed on his cot that night, he had managed to convince himself that Devon didn't care about him. Or at least that she had no interest in developing a more intimate relationship with him. Feeling angry and hurt, he wanted to pull away from her and ignore her.

But he couldn't just turn off his feelings towards her and simply return to life as it was before. Not when he had to deal with her every day, when she was so close. Not when her headstrong nature would inevitably get her into trouble. He couldn't live with himself if anything were to happen to her. No matter how Devon felt about him, he resolved that he would get her to New Pacifica in one piece.

Beads of sweat collected on John's forehead as the Trans Rover drew nearer to the wooded area. While Devon slept beside him, he remembered the first time he saw her. He was performing some routine checks of cargo pod release mechanisms when she passed by, touring the Advance ship with O'Neil. The two of them had been completely absorbed in their discussion so they took no notice of him. Immediately he had been impressed by her beauty. She had a striking figure, with just enough curves in the right places. But the feature which captivated him had been her smile. Her expression was rapt with excitement as she periodically craned her neck to examine the features of the ship.

As attractive as she appeared, the stories he had heard about her made him wary. She was a powerful woman who was used to doing exactly as she pleased. She had resources beyond his imagination and was even the head of her own company. The authoritative manner in which she had addressed the entire Eden project while they were gathered together in space dock left an odd taste in his mouth. Yet despite her status, people on the Stations had laughed at her behind her back, considering her crazy for sacrificing her successful career and place in their society only to pursue the Eden project's venture to G889, a desolate uncolonized planet fraught with unknown perils.

Even though he was physically attracted to her, he chose not to even consider acting on those impulses. He didn't need additional complications in his life. Besides, she was the rich boss, he was only head of the Ops crew. What did they have in common, coming from such different backgrounds? He also had his pride, he wasn't the type of man to have casual affairs. Given Devon's brash personality, he instinctively felt as if any involvement with her would only be setting himself up for future trouble and heartache.

His resolve only strengthened after they had crash landed on G889. His main priorities became keeping his daughter safe and figuring out a way to get them home.

It should have been easy for him to avoid getting involved with Devon. He hadn't planned on falling in love with her. He had already been in love, with Ellie - the mother of his child. He considered himself fortunate to have known her for the short period of time that they had together. And everyday he was thankful for their child, who made his life worth living.

When had it started? When had he fallen in love with Devon?

During their first days on the planet, he had resented her. He was angry that his entire life had been so radically changed and he blamed her for their predicament. Her tendency to rush blindly into unknown situations, taking too many risks, made him uncomfortable. She was shouting orders to the group but she didn't always pick the best course of action. So being his usual undiplomatic self, naturally he had to interfere. He smirked, recalling Devon's reaction to some of his blunt comments. When he informed her that her that priorities had changed, that New Pacifica was no longer the main goal, she seemed shocked that some one would actually question her.

Initially he had continued to give his input to guide the group because he was no fool, he wanted to survive. He had a little girl to protect. G889 frightened him with all its potential dangers.

And while he felt at odds with Devon, his heart ached for her son who seemed so helpless in his immunosuit that he couldn't just stand by. He felt obligated to help transport Uly and rig the ATV for him so he could be mobile. He was a good kid who didn't deserve to feel useless. Likewise, he felt compelled to search for Uly when he disappeared into the Terrian tunnels.

Later when Uly had fallen ill again, he had unilaterally made the decision that the group would travel out of their way to assist the Terrians. He thought he had made that snap judgment for the boy's sake, but with hindsight he realized that the desperation in Devon's expression influenced him as well.

When had it happened? It seemed like there should have been a definite moment. While he searched his memory, he couldn't recall any such incident. The transition in his feelings towards her had been gradual. Somehow it had quietly snuck up on him.

Only when the Elder accused him of being in love with Devon did he realize that it was too late, that he was in trouble. At that point he strove to deny his feelings for her, coming up with the idea of a long range scout to try to put some distance between the two of them. But that hadn't been successful.

He didn't want to love her. But he did.

*This is stupid. She doesn't care about me. I don't mean anything to her.*

For the first time in three days, he began to feel calmer and able to think more rationally. As memories of the past few months on the planet continued to flash through his mind, he tried to convince himself that he was more than a mechanic to her. Devon had confided in him about her concerns for Yale when his mind wash was beginning to fail - that had been difficult for her. She seemed to have trouble opening up to people.

While he had been stuck in that claustrophobic tunnel, his heart nearly leapt into his throat as he heard the catch in her voice when she expressed her fear that something might have happened to him in the spider caves. Later that evening when they spoke on the beach, he sensed that there was an unspoken admission of feelings between the two of them. That there was an attraction between them, but neither were ready to act on it yet. That subtle acknowledgment had provided a sense of peace for him.

But had he read more into that moment than was truly there?

He began to smile as he remembered how frightened Devon had seemed as she forced him to take his medication after he had inhaled that awful flower pollen. He had woken up in the middle of the night to see her asleep in his tent with her head lying on top of a table.

*She just didn't want to lose her main mechanic* a cynical part of him argued.

*That's not true* his heart countered back. She had asked him to watch over the group and her son. Devon took her responsibilities to heart and would never casually hand them over to just anyone. She trusted him with what was most important to her.

As he looked once again towards her sleeping form, another explanation for her behavior that night dawned upon him. She did care about him, maybe she wasn't ready for a closer relationship. After all, if her illness hadn't forced him to face his feelings for her, he probably would still be experiencing reservations about getting involved with her.

What were her reasons? What held her back? Had Uly's father abandoned her once he learned that they had a Syndrome child? To his chagrin, thoughts about Uly's father had entered his mind more than he cared to admit. Had she loved him? Did he break her heart? Was she afraid of setting herself up to be wounded again?

Or perhaps her overall reserve was a product of her social status and upbringing? His discussions with Yale led him to realize that many people had tried to take advantage of her since she was wealthy, ingratiating themselves in her presence only so she could fund their ventures or so they could use her influence to fulfill their goals.

Devon had described her parents as strict. Had they taught her how to construct her walls to protect herself from those types of people? Or had they been part of the reason that her barriers were constructed in the first place?

While he didn't have the answers to those questions, he realized that he had inadvertently taken advantage of Devon. He had kissed her while she was still recovering from her illness and thus was in a vulnerable position. He had crossed a line when she wasn't prepared for it. In order for them to carry their relationship further, he would have to wait until she decided that she was ready, and allow her to make the next move. It might take a while, but he could be a patient man and he wasn't about to give up easily.

THUD *Huh? What was that?* Devon stirred drowsily as she struggled to open her eyelids. Her body felt so heavy, almost as if she were weighted down. *So tired. Where am I?*

She found herself stretched out across the bench seat of the Trans Rover with Danziger's blue jacket wadded up beneath her head, serving as a pillow. She sighed wearily *Not again.* She had thought that she was getting better but this was part of the same old routine.

As she pushed against the seat with shaky limbs and peered out the windshield of the vehicle, she noticed that another part of the routine hadn't changed either. Danziger and Uly had just finishing putting up her tent. She frowned as her stomach muscles began to tighten. Briefly she considered accosting Danziger and firmly telling him to mind his own affairs. But that conversation might lead to issues that she didn't feel comfortable addressing at present.

Then she noticed Dr. Heller stepping out of the Med tent. Aware that the situation with Danziger was ongoing and would not be resolvable in one confrontation, there were other aspects of her life that she could regain control of. She stumbled out of the vehicle and approached the doctor.

"Julia - I need to speak with you."

The woman looked up from a crate she was opening, "Are you feeling all right? Let's check your vitals." As she reached for her diaglove, Devon pulled back impatiently,

"I'm *fine*. I have other business that I need to discuss with you. Privately."

The young doctor rose and followed the older woman into the Med Tent. Devon began stamping her feet, trying to get rid of a sudden stabbing pins-and-needles sensation in her feet and legs. When she caught Julia's concerned expression, she ceased. In a no nonsense tone she held the doctor's gaze and stated,

"Julia, I want to know more about my illness."

Without blinking an eye, the blonde woman responded, "What about it Devon? You were poisoned, the Terrians helped us remove the compound. While they healed you, there weren't any changes at the DNA level like those in your son. I can't explain how they cured you Devon, we've spoken about this before. I just don't know."

Devon impatiently tapped her foot and replied, "Julia, I know all this. Now tell me what I don't know - where did this poison come from? Is it indigenous to the planet? Why haven't we taken any precautions to ensure that this won't happen to other crew members?" Resentment crept into her voice as she added, "Or has something already been done and once again no one has bothered to inform me?"

The young doctor turned her head to the side and was silent for a moment, considering her options. Would this information adversely affect her patient's recovery? How much detail should she go into? Pursing her lips she made her decision,

"Okay, I'll tell you what you want to know. I haven't mentioned this before because I didn't want to upset you." Dodging Devon's irate glance, she continued, "The rest of the group doesn't know about this either, only Yale."

The older woman's eyebrow arched and she prompted, "Well.."

Julia situated herself comfortably on the edge of her cot as she began to explain, "Devon, the poison in your body was synthesized, it's not native to this planet. We believe that the Council implanted it in your body to be released after you had sufficient time to establish the colony."

"What?" she gasped, unsteadily grabbing the nearest available crate for a seat. "But why?"

"The best we could figure out is that after you led the advance team to establish the colony at New Pacifica if something were to happen to you, the colonists would be vulnerable and open to new leadership. Specifically, Council leadership."

Devon closed her eyes as her sense of nausea grew worse. She swallowed hard, "Why are you being so secretive about this?"

Julia took a breath and attempted to illustrate her point, "What purpose would sharing this information with the group serve? We can't change what happened." She rose and began to pace, "Devon, group morale hit absolute bottom after you collapsed. Ebon's death, Elizabeth's warnings about the planet, your illness...it was too much. Now that we've been able to learn more about Elizabeth and Franklin's experiences and you've been cured, people are beginning to feel like they can tackle the challenges of this planet again. Do you really want to take that away from them?"

Devon covered her face with her hands, overwhelmed by the doctor's information. She tried to take slow and deliberate breaths to dissipate the sensation of absolute panic that threatened to over take her. She had to regain control.

With alarm Julia noted, "You don't look well." She crossed the tent and activated her diaglove which she held up to Devon's chest. After examining the readout she admonished, "You need to rest. You shouldn't have been walking so long in the heat today."

"Julia - stop treating me like a child! I am not helpless. I have to start doing *something* for myself or I'll never get better."

"But at a reasonable pace. If you push yourself too hard too fast, you could lose some of the ground that you've gained." Dr. Heller reassured the woman as she sat down beside her, "Devon, I know it's hard for you to let other people take care of you. But this is the way it has to be - for now at least. It won't always be this way." With a slight grin she softly added, "And I don't think certain people mind helping you out."

Devon's face became deeply flushed as she caught the woman's not so subtle hint. She rushed to stand and lost her balance in the process, nearly falling over. As Julia moved forward to help her, she regained her equilibrium and hurried out of the tent.

(End of Part 2)

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