The Road Not Chosen by Joan Powers

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The Road Not Chosen (5/11)
by Joan Powers

(Bess Martin)

I was concerned about Morgan being so tired, yet I was extremely proud of him. I knew how hard it had been for him to even consider such an undertaking as that scouting trip. Like Morgan, I was tired of listening to others laugh at my husband, or make jokes at his expense. I wanted him to enjoy being the hero, for him to have anothermoment of glory.

I was also becoming annoyed by those who had doubts about him. If fact, if Alonzo or Devon, or even Danziger had taken off in a similar fashion, I'd bet that the group would've supported their actions. It didn't seem fair. Why would Eden Advance trust the vague hunches of a select few but not those of my husband? What made those people so special?

Dr. Heller rose to stretch her legs, they'd become stiff from remaining in the same position for such a long time. She began to pace about the Med-Tent to attempt to revitalize herself. Her blue eyes were rimmed with exhaustion, and her blonde hair was pulled back abruptly from her pale face. Once again, she approached her patient and ran a diagnostic scan with her diaglove. Even before checking the read out, she was fully aware of what it would tell her. No change.

Her patient was still in a coma.

Always the logical person, she knew she should get some sleep. She'd been awake nearly twenty-four hours after working all day on the tests, then monitoring her patient most of the night. While those types of hours weren't entirely unusual for her (she never would've made it through Medical School otherwise), her emotional involvement with the case was starting to sap her strength. She chided herself for being so stubborn, it wasn't as if staring at her patient was any known type of effective medical cure. Twenty-four hours hadn't even elapsed yet, a hopeful sign. Still, she was reluctant to desert her post.

For in her heart, she was afraid that the situation was her fault.

After spending most of the night rehashing the facts in her mind, she conceded that the warning signs were all there. Being a qualified professional, she had no excuse -- they were textbook signals, she should've recognized them. Regardless of her training, even just knowing her patient as well as she did, she should've recognized them. She was aware of the potential risks. She should've insisted upon doing things her way. But, she guiltily tormented herself, she'd been too caught up in the excitement of her own projects, too focused on her own objectives.

Her forlorn gaze remained fixed upon her lover's nearly motionless body. She grasped one of his hands and squeezed it in a vain attempt to communicate with him. His skin felt cool and clammy to the touch. In a tone filled with false levity, she tenderly cajoled, "C'mom flyboy. You said you wouldn't leave. You wouldn't break your promise -- would you?" Her last words were almost a whisper, as she choked back a sob which threatened to emerge.

Early in the evening, shortly after she'd completed her tests on Devon, True's screams had drawn the attention of the entire camp. She'd brought them to a meadow where she'd gone after dinner to pick some flowers. The little girl had been terrified to discover the pilot's unconscious body. As the members of Eden Advance rushed to his side, only Julia noticed the derm-applicator which she unobtrusively slipped into her pocket.

To her shame, initially she was angry. After she'd been so firm, making him promise (not once, but several times) to wait on her before he attempted to return to the Dream Plane. After she'd emphasized the potential dangers of the situation to him; he'd deliberately gone ahead and done it anyway. He'd even stolen the sediderm, practically right from under her nose. She was almost livid.

How could he have done such a thing? After it'd taken so long for her to cautiously lower her guard to trust him and allow him into her life, his actions stunned her. He knew how important he was to her. Granted, Alonzo tended to act impulsively, moving in before fully analyzing situations, but he'd given his word -- he'd promised! Had she been naive to think that he'd changed for her? That she was different from the others?

She'd known of Alonzo's reputation back on the Stations; like many of the other cold sleep jumpers, he was a womanizer. A man who'd never made good on a promise made to any lover. That was one of the reasons she'd held back when Alonzo originally expressed an interest in her - she didn't want to become another conquest in the army of dozens.

Yet her feelings of anger and betrayal were rapidly transformed into fear. Based on the empty ampoule in the applicator, she estimated that the dosage of the sediderm should've knocked him out for several hours. He should have revived around midnight, yet it was almost six o'clock in the morning. The amount of sedative in his blood stream wouldn't have induced the coma. Her stomach tightened with fear as she realized that something must've happened to him on the Dream Plane.

Whatever the Terrains had been trying to share with Alonzo for the past few days, it had already affected him -- even prior to yesterday's experience. During her seemingly unending evening of retrospection, she realized where she'd previously seen the look in Alonzo's eyes, and heard the tone of his voice as he became more obsessed about returning to the Dream Plane and more insistent about using a sediderm to do so.

It'd gotten worse over time, that morning he'd practically behaved like another person. Regardless of their circumstances, Alonzo was typically pleasant in the morning. And while they'd had their disagreements in the past, she'd never seen him so surly and so singularly focused upon getting what he wanted as he'd been then.

The look in his eyes haunted her. It reminded her of the alcoholics and drug users she'd treated while on rotation in Med. School. Addicts. People who'd do anything for the substance they so desperately craved.

Alonzo hadn't intentionally broken his promise to her. Whatever force he'd encountered when he'd visited the Dream Plane in this area, or contacted that mysterious 'bubble', was more than he could handle. It had clouded his judgment such that he was no longer in control. She should've realized it sooner. She should've recognized the imminent danger and refused to leave him alone.

She sighed. Her self-recriminations weren't helping Alonzo. But what else could she do? She was reluctant to share his Dream Plane experiences with the others, since she'd promised him that she wouldn't. Trust was a valuable commodity, something that wasn't easily earned. She didn't want to jeopardize Alonzo's trust, especially with her own checkered past. Yet his life could be in danger. Would the circumstances justify violating her word?

Her mind continued to race, trying to make sense of the situation. What had actually happened to him? Unlike his previous experience, she hadn't been there to pull him out when his physical body became stressed. Was the coma simply his body's reaction to the overload of stimuli from touching the 'bubbles'? Then presumably he'd wake up once his body had a chance to recover. Or had the sediderm he'd taken complicated matters, making it impossible for him to pull out of whatever he was experiencing? Causing God only knows what kinds of damage to him?

Regardless of whatever had happened to him, his brain waves indicated that presently he wasn't on the Dream Plane. Otherwise she would've been more than willing to try to crash it herself to rescue her beloved pilot. Yet, that wouldn't have worked. While Devon had been able to visit the Dream Plane to search for her son, her solo effort wasn't successful, she'd required Alonzo's assistance.

Who could help her? Yale, her usual fountain of information, had limited resources regarding the unusual nature of the natives of planet G889. Alonzo was their only resident Terrian expert and liaison.

Still, there was one other. But she couldn't dare to think about it. How could she attempt to involve a nine-year-boy in a potentially dangerous situation? Especially when his mother was incapacitated from the tests she'd recently endured and was unable to offer much counsel.

What was she going to do?

"Mom, are you getting sick again?" Uly hung near the edge of her cot, his voice wavering with fear. His mother was lying flat on her back, just as she had after they'd brought her out of the cold sleep crypt, only three months before. Her eyes lacked their sparkle and her complexion was ghostly pale.

Hovering close by, Yale tried to reassure his young charge in soothing tones. "Uly, this is only temporary. You'll see, your mother's going to be just fine."

With effort, Devon weakly reached for her son's forearm. She croaked, "That's right." She cleared her throat, "Julia did some tests to help me. I don't feel well now, but I'll be okay in a few days."

"Did Julia did tests on Alonzo too?" he asked with concern.

"What ?" Devon turned to try to meet Yale's gaze but he hastily grabbed Uly's shoulder to usher him out of the tent.

"Come Uly, your mother needs to rest." He escorted the boy to the tent flap then added, "I'll be with you in a few minutes. Now go."

"I'll be back later Mom."

Devon tried to boost herself up to a sitting position but a sickening lurch in her stomach interfered with her efforts. "Okay Yale, what happened?" When he didn't respond immediately, she added, "C'mon, I know something's going on."

To her surprise, Yale looked at her with sympathy. Then he began to chuckle and reply, "You always were a stubborn little girl. You look awful. No wonder poor Uly is frightened. Are you pleased that you pushed Julia so hard to do these tests?"

Uncomfortable and embarrassed, Devon retorted, "They had to be done." To slam the door on any attempts to continue that topic, she stated as firmly as she could manage, "I don't want to discuss it."

With a sly grin, he dryly responded, "I see. Now I suppose you have a better understanding of Dr. Heller's reservations."

Even though she felt miserable, she recognized a diversion when she saw it. Fear and adrenaline pumping through her enabled her to respond more sharply. "I can deal with this. What happened to Alonzo? "

His smile turned into a somber expression as he pulled up a camp stool and sat down beside her cot. "You always were difficult to keep things from. Last night, True found Alonzo, unconscious in a meadow."

Momentarily she closed her eyes and sank back against her pillow, "Oh my God." Taking a breath, she asked, "Is he okay now? Maybe we're not alone here? Are there penal colonists or ZED's out there?" Once again she tried to sit up, but Yale reached over to prevent her from doing so.

"Calm down Devon, our perimeter scans haven't revealed any intruders. Unfortunately, Alonzo's in a coma."

"Oh no," she sighed.

The teacher explained, "Julia says she doesn't know what caused it, or how to bring him out of it."

Becoming more agitated, Devon wondered, "Maybe the Terrians are upset about Morgan and Walman traveling in the valley. Perhaps they've violated an area that's sacred to them and they're taking out their anger on Alonzo."

Yale considered her idea. "I don't think so. That's not consistent with the ways that we've seen the Terrians behave. Unless threatened, they tend to be non-aggressive. And even then, they have been direct about their intentions. If they were upset with Morgan and Walman, I think they would deal with them rather than Alonzo."

With mounting anxiety, Devon emphasized, "Regardless, we've gotta get those men back in Yale."

"Bess has assured us that they are returning."

"We also have to alert Baines and Magus to the possibility that we might not be alone here."

"Devon, we're already on it. Everyone's doing their part. Everyone except you." She stared at him. "Your job is to recover your strength and not create more problems for us to handle." He poured some water into a metal cup then took some tablets out of his pocket. "Julia gave these to me for you."

She eyed them suspiciously, "What are they for?"

"To help you with the nausea and cramping, and to help you rest."

Devon protested, but not as energetically, "I can't go to sleep Yale, the group may need me."

Yale helped her to sit up then placed the pills in her palm. He insisted, "Devon, we're doing all that we can. Take your medication and get some rest."

She examined the small brown pills before reluctantly placing them into her mouth. She took the cup from Yale to drink some water to swallow them.

"He's right Devon. I couldn't have said it better myself." Danziger's deep voice joined in as Yale helped her back to her resting position.

Yale rose, "I'll be back later with more news. Get some sleep." After nodding a greeting towards Danziger, he lifted the tent flap to exit.

Danziger assumed the other man's seat. Gently laying a hand against her cheek he asked, "How're you doing?"

The discussion with Yale had nearly worn her out. She responded with considerably less enthusiasm, "I'll survive. Tell me more about Alonzo."

"At this point, there's not much to say. The doc's doing all she can. I've doubled our camp guards and sent out armed search parties in groups of two, just in case. The kids aren't to leave camp."

Devon stubbornly tried to move, but it was a losing battle.

Danziger tried to reassure her, "We're handling the situation the best that we can. Hopefully 'Lonz will come out of it soon, and Walman and Morgan will return so things can get back to normal around here." Changing the subject, he added, "You look terrible."

"Thanks a lot. You really know how to compliment a person," she half yawned.

More tenderly, he responded, "Get some sleep Adair, okay? It gives me the creeps to see you like this so soon after that last experience. You gotta get well --soon."

She smiled weakly, "I'm tryin'. I guess I can trust you to take care of things in my absence."

"You bet."

Looking into John's blue eyes reminded her of how much she'd grown to depend upon him, and trust him implicitly. In her absence, he'd managed to keep Eden Advance together and focused on their goal of reaching New Pacifica. He'd even treated her son as his own and had begun to form a special relationship with him. As hard as it was for her to trust others, John had definitely made inroads into her life.

As Devon's eyelids started to droop, he rose.

"John?"

"Yeah?"

She fought her drowsiness, for a question that'd been bothering her flashed into her mind, "How did you know that I didn't have a bio-stat implant?"

His body noticeably stiffened. He averted his gaze and didn't respond immediately. "Uh...it's kinda... a long story. Another time?"

She was intrigued, there was even more to this than she'd thought. Otherwise, why was John so uncomfortable? Yet, thanks to those dratted pills (and her outburst with Yale), she was about to fall asleep, so she decided to let him off the hook. For now. "Okay."

"Julia! He's moving!" True excitedly called over to the doctor.

Julia grabbed her diaglove and rushed over as the pilot began to stir. After scanning him, she broke out into a grin as she examined the readout. "He's out of the coma! And there doesn't appear to be any major damage." Tears of relief welled up in both their eyes.

Alonzo groaned.

Leaning closer to him, Julia smoothly relayed, "It's okay. You're all right now. You probably feel pretty weak, but you're gonna be okay."

He opened his eyes.

"Alonzo?"

He stared ahead as if he didn't see her, or hear her voice.

"Can you hear me?" She leaned closer to meet his gaze.

"Julia?" True stood close by, ready to assist. Dr. Heller ignored her, concentrating on her patient.

As Alonzo began to focus on his surroundings, he gasped, "They threw me out! I can't believe they did that!" His voice became deeper and more strident, "I have to get back there. Don't you see? The answer is there -- all the answers are there." Despite his weakened state, he grabbed Julia's wrist tightly and demanded, "Give me another sediderm so I can go back."

True froze in place, horrified by the pilot's behavior. He didn't even sound like himself.

Julia was frightened as well and her wrist was beginning to ache, but she tried to reason with him. Keeping her voice level, she explained, "You're not ready to go back. You need to rest and recover your strength. If the Terrians did throw you out, they may've been trying to protect you."

He disagreed, "No, they're keeping it from me. They've changed their minds. They want to keep it all to themselves." With his other hand he attempted to grab Julia's upper arm so he could use her body to lever himself up to a sitting position. The doctor drew back as far as she could, her wrist still held hostage.

"True, get help!" Seeing that the young girl was motionless, she emphasized, "Now!"

Should she or shouldn't she?

The question tormented her sleep deprived brain. Julia thought she'd hit rock bottom last night as she kept watch over Alonzo, but tonight she felt even worse. He wasn't the same person. He was out of the coma but he was exhibiting obsessive personality traits. He didn't appear to recognize anyone, not even her. All he spoke about was his anger at the Terrians and his frantic obsession to return to the Dream Plane.

Presently he was physically too weak to move from his cot without assistance, but in his current frame of mind she didn't trust him. Especially after he'd bruised her wrist so badly. Danziger and Cameron had secured him to his cot with restraints, and established a guard; measures that sickened her but were deemed necessary by the others at camp.

Upon reaching a decision, she left her tent to look for Uly. It didn't take long for her to find him. Conveniently enough, he was by himself. She half-heartedly tried to convince herself that this was a sign from the cosmos, validating her plan. She steeled herself, and took a deep breath as she approached him. He was poking at the edge of the communal evening camp fire with a stick. She sat down on a dead log beside him, "Uly, can we talk?"

The child turned pale, frightened by her serious tone, "Mom?"

"No! Your mom's gonna be okay. We have to let her rest for a few days but she's gonna be all right. It'll just take time." Julia reassured him.

"What do you want then?" The child was confused and preoccupied with his mother's condition.

She hated to burden him but after she'd run through all the possible scenarios in her mind, she felt as if this was the best option. She was going to be completely honest with him. "Um...Uly, I need your help. I know it's a lot to ask of you. You're only nine years old. But I think even you know that you're not an ordinary boy, not after all you've been through on this planet. You have a special connection to the Terrians. What I'm going to ask you has to stay between you and me, for now anyway - okay?"

"Why?" He asked, eyes narrowing with suspicion.

"Uly, have you ever made someone a promise?" He nodded. "Well, I promised Alonzo I wouldn't tell anyone about his recent experiences on the Dream Plane. I don't want to break my promise, but he's in trouble. I think the Terrians in this area have been trying to show him something that's pretty important, and it's affecting him. I don't think they mean any harm by it, but it could cause some serious damage to him."

"I can talk with them. I'm sure they wouldn't want to hurt Alonzo," Uly volunteered.

Julia objected, "No! Uly, it could be very dangerous. What I'd like you to do is simply ask your Terrain friends about this area. Ask them if there's something special about it or about the Terrians here. Perhaps you could tell them that Alonzo's been acting strangely, and you could ask if they have any ideas about what might be causing this. Maybe even ask them about the bubbles."

"Bubbles?" He frowned.

"Yeah, bubbles."

"Okay. Julia, is Alonzo gonna be okay?"

Oh no. This was the absolute hardest part. Though she wasn't sure if it was because it was difficult to admit it to a young child or to herself.

"I don't know."

Uly stood, "I'll get started."

"Wait!" He complied. "Listen to me. Whatever you do Uly, do not go to see those bubbles or to that special place on the Dream Plane by yourself or with the Terrians. No matter what the Terrians say. Not under any circumstances. Do you understand me? It's too dangerous. This is no game Uly, I'm telling you the truth. I'm not trying to scare you, but I want you to know what you're dealing with. Promise me - no - swear to me that you won't let them show you anything. Your goal is to get some information which we may need to share with the rest of the group in order to help Alonzo. Do you swear that you'll only talk with your Terrian friends and not let them show you anything? "

"Okay, I swear. Guess it's like a secret mission -- huh? And I'm a spy - but the good kind." He grinned.

"Yeah Uly, you could say that."

" Morgan, I'm scared. Strange things are happening at camp. I need you here - with me," Bess spoke into her gear.

"We'll be back as soon as we can." Morgan's image replied in a strangely hollow tone which lacked conviction.

Slightly irritated, Bess responded, "And when will that be? You've shown us that the passage is safe. You two don't have to scout all the way to New Pacifica. Stop this macho garbage -- you've done enough. You don't have to prove yourself to me, Morgan Martin, I already believe in you. And so does everyone else. We need you back at camp. Yale claims Julia did some tests on Devon but I'm afraid that she's had some sort of a relapse. And something horrible has happened to Alonzo. He was in a coma for almost twenty four hours, and now he's acting as if he's possessed by something. He almost broke Julia's wrist!"

"We're on our way," he mumbled.

Bess cocked her head. The words were what she'd been wanting to hear, but she wasn't relieved; the tone was wrong. Her woman's intuition prickled, immediately alerting all her senses. Noticing the dark circles beneath her husband's eyes, she asked, "Honey...are you feeling all right?"

Uncharacteristically Morgan tried to downplay his feelings, "I think I'm catching a cold. I'm kinda tired but I'll be okay."

She gushed with sympathy, "My poor baby! Is Walman catching this too?"

"I think so. But it's no big deal," he claimed. "We can deal with it."

"Has he been behaving any better?" Morgan didn't seem to remember what she was referring to, so she prompted, "Is he still making all those bad jokes about the Council, trying to scare you half to death?"

"Uh, no. He's been better today."

Bess took charge. "Tell him that you're heading back to camp --now. You need to come back so I can nurse you back to health. Or better yet, let me talk to him."

Morgan protested, "Honey, I'll take care of this."

"Then I'll expect to see you back at camp in a day or two."

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