Date: Fri, 26 Mar 1999 17:49:24 +0000 From: Alexia/Sabrina Subject: REPOST: A House of Windows: Part 1a Sender: owner-tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu To: seaquest-ff@quixotic.org, sqfanfic@onelist.com, tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu Reply-to: Alexia/Sabrina X-Mailer: Microsoft Outlook Express 4.72.3110.1 Disclaimer and Notes First of all, I’m just borrowing the characters that are from the series. They are the property of Universal Television, and the sci-fi channel, as is SeaQuest. This story and all subsequent parts are copyright to E.Casale, 1997, 1998. Be warned. This story contains violence and swearing. Rated 15. NB: contains themes of physical child abuse that some may find disturbing. Well, this is my second attempt at writing and it’s a bit different from the last one. What happened was that I wrote out a long and complex plan for a story and then I decided to add a two page prologue. The prologue grew to become this story. At the time, I called it my ‘monster story’ because I had no idea what was going to happen next and when I knew, I had to write it and couldn’t delete it, which left me in some very awkward spots, plot-wise. The story is set about 4 or 5 years before the series starts. I wrote it after a discussion by the people in the dedications list, when I suddenly came up with this idea that, I think, gets everyone’s views in, even if it is in an slightly round about way. It also seems like a recurring topic, so I thought that this would interest people. Also, I’ve always wanted to know the full story about this background, not just little bits. As it turned out, this is much more my type of writing- talking and emotions, not lots of action and it’s about things that I know and believe strongly in, so I hope I did a good job of it. I didn’t have the time or the patience to really research this properly so I’m sorry, if I’m completely inaccurate! I did do some research this time at least. All comments/suggestions/ criticisms/ advice/ etc. are welcome, but please send them to me personally at i.casale@ukonline.co.uk. Suggestions on this are also very welcome. Please note that I’m dyslexic and I have particular problems with names. Next, I want to say a huge thank you to Ann and Emma for editing this for me and for their vast amounts of help and wonderful advice. Thanks for your patience with me! There’s probably something that I’ve missed but I can’t think of anything. I hope you all enjoy it. Sorry if it’s a load of trash, but at least I had a go, right? This story is for: Al, Amy, Ann, Carin, Chris, Emma, Karel, Kate, Kathryn, Kathy, Lea and Ltjg. Rufio. I hope this covers everyone’s opinion from the discussion and that I haven’t missed anyone when I was collecting names ( if I did, sorry and consider yourself included- tell me and I’ll add your name). I hope you all enjoy it or at least the effort and excuse my ineloquence. ( Is that a word? - writer’s privilege to neologism!) But most of all for KC- a wonderful, wonderful person and friend. Lex “ Children begin by loving their parents. After a time they judge them. Rarely, if ever, do they forgive them.” Oscar Wilde, A Woman of No Importance ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A House of Windows “ The body is a house of windows: there we all sit, showing ourselves and crying on the passers-by to come in and love us.” Robert Louis Stevenson Part 1 The room was very dark, the curtains pulled shut over the glaring sunlight outside. For a while she blinked in the doorway, trying to make out details in the light from the corridor, holding the door ajar while her eyes adjusted. Gradually the apartment grew slowly clearer, object outlines becoming visible, then defined, all blanketed in grey. The only colours were the water reflections from the tropical fish tank which had its own small light, serving to refract patterns off the surface of the water so that the walls rippled in the darkness with an eerie, glowing enchantment. The figure curled on one end of the sofa didn’t move but sat silently regarding the moving walls, his eyes reflecting the light so that the two glints were her first clue that there was anyone there. Then artificial light flooded the room and she cleared her face to leave only a pleasant, warm smile pasted across her delicate features. She dropped her hand from the switch and walked briskly across the room, putting down her bag and collapsing back into a padded arm chair. “ And how was your day?” she teased lightly. His eyes flickered across to rest on her, his face in profile from where she sat. Then he turned to face her, staring through her with those striking blue eyes that ran in their family. He regarded her calmly, letting her take in the bruise across his high cheek bone up to its edge. He turned away again after a moment. Neither face registered any emotion. Laura shut her eyes briefly and went into the kitchen, returning with a tea towel full of ice, which she pressed gently against his face as she sat next to him. He took it from her and held it in place, still looking away. “ I’ll telephone Sally and see if she can come to check on you tomorrow. You can take the day off, then there’s the weekend and it should have gone by Monday,” she said brightly. “ You must be more careful, it’s not a wonder you have all these accidents the way you rush around.” It sounded forced even to her. After a few moments he turned to back towards her. “ Why do you say things like that when there’s no one to lie to? We both know, so who are you trying to... or does it convince you, saying it: that I had an accident, that I fell.” He sighed: this wasn’t going to help. “ Just once ask what really happened or don’t say anything.” She looked at him, pleadingly, fear shining in her expressive eyes. “ Be more careful.” He wasn’t sure whether she was warning or excusing. “ It’s not what I do, it’s me: that I’m alive and that I live here.” Today he just didn’t seem to be able to forget about it or bury it and he was very angry. “ Have you even talked to him about it? Or don’t you care at all? You don’t do anything; you don’t say anything. You don’t even ask how I feel...” “ That’s enough!” she snapped at him furiously and got up, going into her bedroom to change out of her work things. She stared at herself in the mirror as she brushed and styled her long, slightly wavy, golden-blond hair, pushing it out of her mind and away. She walked over to the cupboard and carefully selected a long, tapered velvet dress, to replace her smart business suit, and a double string of fresh water pearls. When she had finished making herself ready to go out again, she wandered back into the main room where her son was now leaning forward from the couch typing rapidly on his laptop computer. He looked up as she came out of the room, seeing the movement in his peripheral vision and smiled. “ You look lovely,” he told her dutifully and then, his face growing serious, “ I’m sorry.” “ That’s all right, darling. That’s what being a teenager is like, I can’t begrudge you a small sulk. Now, you order what you want for dinner, as take out, tonight. Just put it on our account.” She stopped to look at herself once more in the mirror, smoothing the dress over her slim figure. “ OK.” He turned back to the screen. “ Have a nice time,” he added tonelessly. “ I will. Don’t stay up too late!” she ordered as she left. When was the last time I did that? Like there would be a point, as in someone noticing I’d rather just make sure that I’m out of the way. Tonight it struck him, even more than usual, how like a child she was sometimes. She was happy, and didn’t want to see anything unpleasant in her life. He didn’t begrudge her that, was glad for her in an aching, pained sort of way. It wasn’t so much that it hurt physically, and he had never cared for his step father, so he didn’t mind that it was him. What hurt was the fact that his mother didn’t care enough to stop it happening. He had accepted that whatever he did he wasn’t going to please McKenzie, wasn’t even going to be tolerable to him, but although he knew that, he still couldn’t help feeling that it was somehow his fault. He didn’t seem to be able to get anyone to really care: his mother, her new husband, his real father- who wasn’t interested and didn’t have time. What exactly was it about him that made them either hate him or just not want to bother? His mother didn’t want to acknowledge what was happening because for once she really did seem to be happy. Her career was going well and McKenzie did love her: he showed it, he said it and she felt it. However much it hurt he knew that she didn’t want to know, simply because it would mean that she would have to do something, but she would rather give up her son than her new husband. Was it because she loved him less or because she needed David McKenzie more? The problem was that there was no one else: no joint custody with his real father, no siblings, no close relatives and no really good friends that he could talk to, about this at any rate. He would have left, but there was no where to go, no one to go to. More than wondering all the time what he was going to be accused of doing wrong next, feeling on edge, having to be alert to get out of the way, it was feeling like there was no one that really cared about him. And much as he hated the fact, wanted to think of himself as self-dependent and mature, sometimes he just wanted to be looked after, almost like a small child, to have that feeling of complete security, safety, love, warmth, comfort... but most of all love. He looked up from the screen of his laptop as he heard the front door open. He was about to call out a greeting when he heard it slam shut quickly and as loudly as its padded frame would allow. He stared at the screen and it blinked back at him on autosave. Breathe, relax, no fear... But he was afraid, not desperately but in an expectant, knowing, fed up sort of way and he didn’t like it. And if his fear showed he would be in worse trouble than the slam boded. He knew that they ( McKenzie and his mother ) were scheduled to go out again in about an hour, so if he could just stay out of the way in his room and keep quiet it would be OK; McKenzie never actually came to looking him. The door opened and McKenzie stared at him briefly. His initial, disconcerted fear quickly converted to confusion. McKenzie’s suit was badly crumpled and he had a general appearance of disarray unusual for him, and he looked worried. Then he grabbed a chair and swang it into place beside Lucas, sitting down heavily. “ Turn this off!” he ordered, firmly. “Do it!” His voice was warning enough and Lucas complied, pressing the relevant keys,as McKenzie took out and tried to smooth a crumpled sheet of paper. He propped it against the bottom of the monitor. “ I need you to access the Iota-459 file on this person’s computer.” He scowled darkly. “ Now!” Lucas started typing, snatching sideways glances at McKenzie. The man next to him seemed to be a total stranger. If he didn’t know better McKenzie’s fixed stare and tight jaw almost made him look desperate, even afraid. Lucas wasn’t sure if this was better or worse. McKenzie looked over at him impatiently as he typed, bringing up the relevant front page and then hacking quickly through the feeble security nets and into the main system to find the relevant file name. “ It’s secured and encoded.” He explained, staying as neutrally as he could. “ Then unsecure it, unencode it,” McKenzie hissed. Lucas turned back to the screen. “ It shouldn’t take too long, it’s not a very complex program... OK, there it is.” He stared blankly at the screen which seemed to contain a long data file with a few notes at the side, equations and formulae- it looked like the raw data from an experiment. Beyond that it didn’t seem to make any sense. McKenzie was devouring it, scrolling down quickly, reading avidly. Lucas was totally bewildered, not the least by the strange file and McKenzie’s manner, but the fact that he needed his help and seemed, for once, to be able to tolerate his presence. The file must be pretty damned important to him. “ Is this... what you wanted?” he asked nervously, not sure whether breaking the silence was a sensible move. McKenzie nodded, still reading. “ I need you to copy this and everything else in this directory to this disk,” he said handing one over. Lucas typed in the relevant commands. “ Done,” he reported. “ Now delete everything.” Lucas frowned confused. “ On the disk?” “ No- the original.” “ I can’t,” he said too quickly, then hastily added, “ it’s illegal. I mean it’s illegal to break in a read someone’s files without permission, but it’s worse to delete them and it’s on a different part of the system. With this access like this it’s read only...” “ So you can’t delete it?” he asked darkly. “ Well, I could but...” “ But?” “ They can trace it and then we’ll be in deep shit.” Oh, great. Piss him off and swear. “ If you’re such a genius with these things, can’t you ‘hide’ the link or whatever it is you do?” I can... “ I suppose so. But...” “ Just do it.” Lucas nodded, truly scared now. McKenzie was not the sort of person to do anything illegal, at least not unless something very, very serious had happened. It had to be very important for him to be taking such a risk. Then again, if we get caught he can just blame it on me, Lucas thought wryly. For a moment he even wondered if this was McKenzie’s plan: that he was doing this to get rid of him. “ Um... Why... What am I deleting?” “ Data from experiments on a new substance that we think might be a breakthrough in anaestetics and anaesthetics.” Lucas turned, aghast. “ We’ve got a copy. I just want to make sure our company gets the patent, not NTR.” Why are you telling me this? “ Isn’t that what you’ve been working on?” He paused, trying to delay to have time to think. “ The line I took on the research fell through. I don’t have time to start again. We think that it could have all the properties of aspirin that help in things like heart problems ( it’s an anticoagulant ) without any of the side effects and that it wouldn’t be affected by things like eating and drinking before hand. We need to get the patent first.” “ Why is it so important? So long as some one is producing it then....” “ ‘Some one’ is the whole point. If that isn’t my company my career is over. This is worth...” His voice indicated the amount. “ Something like this we can charge for and people will pay,” he explained condescendingly. “ But this...” is something that all people should be able to have, not just if they can afford it! He suddenly started to feel like there was something cold and tight growing in him and he felt hot. He stared at the screen as he continued to hack though the systems so that he would have ‘write’ and ‘delete’ capabilities on the files. The system was simple and he continued on automatic pilot. Without even thinking it through he knew that he couldn’ t delete the files. Why not? One, because this is someone else’s research and we’re stealing it. Two, because if McKenzie’s company gets it it will mean that people won’t have access to it and everyone should. Three... “ When you’ve done that I need you to go into the funding records for the project and transfer the money out. I don’t care where, just make sure that no one can trace it and it looks like the researcher took it.” Three, because embezzling funds is a serious crime and if I do it properly someone innocent else is going to go to prison for it. But what’s he going to do if I say no? “No.” McKenzie looked at him quite calmly. “ But it is possible, right?” Lucas nodded, knowing that he wouldn’t be able to lie convincingly, feeling every part of him growing tense. “ I need you to do this. ‘No’ isn’t an option. This is my career. I’ve worked too hard to lose it all and I will. This is just too important, even if it is just one mistake and one that I could do something about with a bit more time.” Lucas stared at the screen. “ And I need it done now.” Lucas blinked back his tears, hoping desperately that McKenzie couldn’t see how terrified and desperate he was feeling, how trapped. He didn’t even feel the blow that threw him out of the chair, was only aware that he was suddenly on the floor. “ Stay the hell away from me!” He shouted in panic; he hadn’t had time to think. As soon as he had said it, he knew that it was the wrong thing, that it was really stuid in fact, and could only make things worse. Then McKenzie was pulling him to his feet, pinning him against the wall, with one hand across his chest trapping his arms and the other one on his shoulder. Lucas shut his eyes, not to have to see what was coming next. “ This really isn’t a request. I can’t afford to lose this and I need you to delete the files.” He shifted his stance, the second hand closing around Lucas’ throat, the grip growing tighter. He opened his eyes and searched McKenzie’s somewhat unwilling, but still determined face and tried to swallow, finding this increasingly hard. “Get your f***ing hands off me!” Oh, God, he’s going to kill me. “ I’m sorry, but I can’t...” he whispered, his eyes pleading, bright with scared tears. McKenzie cut him off, increasing the pressure. “ You will not speak to me like that!” he shouted and then sighed, trying to keep perfectly calm. He couldn’t afford to act as he wished, not until he had the files deleted and he always did regret his temper, after the fact. “I’m sorry too, but I can’ t afford to let this happen. I don’t want to hurt you...” He paused here realising that wasn’t true and then continued. ignoring the unfinished statement. “ I really have no choice here,” McKenzie excused and tightened his grip again. Even if he had had anything to say he couldn’t have said it now, the hand around his throat making it very hard to breathe at all and getting harder. He shut his eyes again, not caring that he was crying, trying to fight the fact that he was starting to consider complying. Neither of them heard the door open or close, too intent: McKenzie on Lucas, and Lucas on breathing. “ David!” Laura was standing in the corridor, staring at them through the open door, her face pinched and white. She dropped her bag and coat and came towards them. Lucas looked at her helplessly, still not able to speak, terrified, pleading with his eyes. Get out, get help! Stay, do something! McKenzie seemed to have frozen, though his grip was as tight as ever. He simply watched her as she came slowly towards them, locking her eyes with his. “ Let him go,” she told him in a small, tight voice. “ Get out!” he snapped, emotions now beginning to flow across his face: fear, anger, desperation... She shook her head and pulled at his arm. “ You can’t do this. I can’t watch this!” she whispered and pulled harder then jumped back as McKenzie lifted his arm and slapped her across the face once, hard and sharp, quickly pinning Lucas back against the wall before he had realised he was free. Dam* you to hell. If I get out of this... She looked between the two of them, aghast and terrified in turn and then ran out of the room. McKenzie stared after her with equal shock and for a moment looked about to go after her. The door slammed a few seconds later. They both stared at the door. Lucas let himself relax now against the wall, crying silently. Just get it over with. He didn’t care what was going to happen next, whether he would do what McKenzie asked. He had always thought that she could only do nothing by convincing herself that it wasn’t happening and for a moment that had seemed true. How could she leave him there? He knew she wasn’t going to get help, that she would probably just return an hour later as if nothing had happened, at least not to him. He wasn’t sure what she would return to, though, by then. He hated himself for crying so openly, knowing that he wasn ’t going to hold out much longer, but he was too scared and too hurt to care. His chest was aching now, his lungs cold and tight, a vague feeling of nausea growing in his stomach. After about a minute or two McKenzie turned back to him and the grip started to tighten again. “ Hello? Lucas?” A bright voice called from the other room. Thank God! McKenzie glanced towards the door fearfully. “ Who’s that?” he hissed, releasing his grasp slightly for Lucas to answer. “ Sally... Mum wanted me to... take the day... off... she asked Sally to come and check on me,” he explained painfully. “ Lucas?! Stop fiddling with that computer and help me put away the shopping!” McKenzie turned back to him and then released him abruptly, realising that he would have to go and talk to her. He pulled the key out on the inside of the door and locked it as he left. Lucas heard him move into the other room and greet Sally. Lucas leant back against the wall gasping for a few moments. Think! Do something! He pushed himself up off the floor, gently fingering his neck and closed the laptop, roughly cramming it into a bag, which he slug across his shoulder. Then he went to the window, pulling himself up onto the sill. He wasn’t afraid of the drop. He had done this before to get out of the house when he was trying to avoid McKenzie. He reached over and quickly pulled himself along the wall and dropped down onto the next balcony and ran down the fire escape, as fast as he could, but only a few levels and then inside again; McKenzie would come after him when he saw the open window. From there he went down the internal stairway and into the basement car park. Sally’s car was over at the far corner and he crouched down between it and a pillar in the darkness, trying to keep his sobbing breaths quiet, still crying, not fully sure how he had got there. He seemed to have waited an age before he heard her walking across the concrete. He peered through the windows to make sure that it was her, watching the short, but well proportioned figure approaching, and then slid around to her side of the car. She started as she saw the figure getting up from behind her car, her eyes opening wide in panic. “ It’s me, Lucas!” He whispered as loudly as he dared. She laughed pressing a hand against her chest and continuing her walk. What are you doing! You scared me to death... Lucas are you all right? Oh my God. What happened.” She hurried the last few steps towards him as she saw his bruised, tear streaked face in the lights of a passing car, gently putting her hand on his arm. He looked around fearfully. “ Will you take me somewhere?” he asked. Sally nodded and unlocked the doors, opening and closing it for him, then going around the other side to get in. She looked across at him worriedly as she started the car, but he was staring fixedly ahead. The car pulled away smoothly and then they were out in the open sunshine. They drove away from the new, expensive flats and then into the park drive, pulling over under a group of dark, shady trees. She turned to him, reaching a hand across to him and then holding him tightly as he cried silently against her. His throat hurt too much to allow him to sob ashe wanted, so he just held her tightly, too tightly, and cried. After what seemed like a long time he sat back in his seat, drying his face on a sleeve. “ Sorry,” he said shakily. “ I...” She took his hand gently and waited. He looked out of the window at the field and the copses of copper beeches, dark and sultry against the summer-blue sky, shining in the cool sea breeze. He never even considered going back. He thought about who he could go to for help, to protect them, and there really wasn’t anyone. He swallowed, wincing at the pain. “ Can you take me to the Police Station?” he asked blankly. She looked at him carefully for a moment and then nodded. The car pulled away and he shut his eyes leaning back and trying to think about the warmth of the sun on his face not the implications, the right and wrongs of what he was doing. Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999 Date: Sat, 27 Mar 1999 22:37:53 +0000 From: Alexia/Sabrina Subject: Repost: A House of Windows: Part 1b Sender: owner-tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu To: seaquest-ff@quixotic.org, sqfanfic@onelist.com, tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu Reply-to: Alexia/Sabrina X-Mailer: Microsoft Outlook Express 4.72.3110.1 Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998 ,1999 “ Can you take me to the Police Station?” he asked blankly. She looked at him carefully for a moment and then nodded. The car pulled away and he shut his eyes leaning back and trying to think about the warmth of the sun on his face not the implications, the right and wrongs of what he was doing. “ OK, we’re here,” she told him gently. He looked over at her. “ Thank you.” She nodded. “ Ready?” He took a slow breath and opened the door after a last wipe at his face. It shouldn’t be too obvious that he’d been crying now, at least he hoped not. Sally walked beside him silently, knowing that this wasn’t the time to ask questions, but not sure if she was doing what was best, as she had no idea what was going on. But she trusted him. He wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t something serious, and she had never known him to be so openly upset. He hugged the computer tightly to him, the other hand protectively at his throat. The building was new and clean. No one seemed curious as they passed up the steps and in through one set of double doors. In the hall Lucas stopped, completely confused. He didn’t even know who he should see, what he would say. He took another careful breath and continued across to what seemed like an information/reception desk in the middle of the hall. He hovered uncertainly in front of it, looking at the people busy on the phones. “ Yes? Can I help you?” Lucas looked up and nodded slowly at the uniformed man. He walked over to stand in front of him, when the man smiled encouragingly and beckoned. “ How can I help?” he repeated. Lucas looked at him helplessly. “ I... um...” What was it you were meant to say here? What did he want to say? Oh my god, What am I doing! He rubbed at his throat, meeting the other man’s stare blankly, blinking as tears started to form again. Sally stood closer then, holding his arm gently. “ Why are we here?” she prompted gently, smiling nervously at the waiting officer. He nodded at her to show that he didn’t mind waiting. “ Do you want to talk to a police man or is it something else? Do you have a crime to report?” Lucas looked up at him and nodded slowly. He felt so stupid, but he didn’t know what to say and he was terrified that if he tried talking he would just start crying again. He sighed and then pushed the computer across the reception desk. “ Stolen?” The man asked sympathetically. Lucas shook his head and the other man frowned, confused, then pressed an intercom button, turning away slightly and speaking very quietly so that neither Sally or Lucas could hear. After a moment he turned back to them. “ OK. Detective Ramas is going to come and talk to you. I think he’ll be able to help. OK?” Lucas smiled wanly, very grateful. A short man in his early forties came up, looking astutely them and then leaning over to the man at the front desk, who whispered something to him. He nodded and stood up again. He held out his hand to Lucas. “ Detective Ramas.” Lucas shook his hand limply. “ OK. Let’s go up to my office and see how we can help.” He looked at Lucas for a reply and he nodded, picking up the computer again and following the other man across the hall. They went up a small flight of stairs, down a corridor and finally into a small, though not cramped, office. Ramas gestured for them to sit down on a couch on one side of the room, then he pulled up a chair opposite them. “ I’m Sally and this is Lucas,” she told him taking the initiative. “ How can I help?” he asked. Sally looked across at Lucas. He looked at her in turn and she nodded emphatically. “ You have to tell us before we can help.” He moved his gaze to Ramas, for a moment, to weigh him up. “ As this is a police station I guess you’re here to report a crime and we’re assuming, until you tell us otherwise, that it’s something to do with this computer.” Lucas sighed and, taking it out, opened it and turned it towards Ramas. “ He asked me to hack into this file and copy it. Then he wanted me to delete it and... um... take the rest of the grant out of the researcher’s account, but so that it would look like he had taken it,” he said at a rush. Blinking in surprise when he had said it. He pushed back the blond fall of hair from his eyes, to watch the other man carefully. Ramas looked at the file. “ What is this file?” “ Um... it’s an experiment on a new pain killer.” Don’t think about what you ’re doing. Just answer the questions as clearly as you can. “ And why were you asked to delete this?” “ His research went wrong and this other person’s company was going to get the patent. He said that it was very important, that he would lose his job if his company didn’t get it, as it was his responsibility.. and it was worth a lot of money.” “ Why take the funds?” Ramas looked puzzled Lucas shook his head. “ I don’t know. Maybe so that people wouldn’t believe him ( the other researcher) when he said it was deleted and stolen?” He was astonished at how clearly he was thinking, though he wasn’t aware that any actual thoughts had passed through his mind. “ He said that the patent was worth a lot of money. They could charge people what they wanted for it... but it’s something that shouldn’t be used like that. Too may people need it and not everyone would be able to afford it.” He looked at Ramas, needing him to tell him that he was doing the right thing. Ramas raised a hand and titled Lucas face away. Lucas pulled away. “ Sorry.” Ramas paused looking at the file. “I gather you didn’t want to do it, right?” Lucas nodded. “ I hacked into the file and I copied it but... but then he explained what it was.” Ramas glanced quickly over at Sally and the back to Lucas. “ I guess the next question is: Who is ‘he’?” His voice was soft and gentle. Lucas stared at the floor, then the computer screen. “ Dr. David McKenzie,” he said very quietly. Sally, gently put her hand on his arm and squeezed it comfortingly. She looked over to Ramas and then to the door. He nodded. “ Thank you, Lucas. I have to go and talk to Sally and some other people, OK? We’ll be back in a moment. Are you OK by yourself for a few minutes?” Lucas nodded at the screen. “ You did good, kid.” Lucas looked up at him, intensely. “ Real good.” Ramas smiled at him. “ We’ll be right back, OK?” Lucas nodded again, this time sitting back against the comfortable back of the couch. “ Who’s McKenzie?” Ramas asked, turning to Sally as soon as he closed the door behind them. “ His step father.” Ramas nodded sadly. “ Yeah.” He sighed and then looked confused. “ I thought... you’re not his mother?” “ No, I’m the housekeeper. I thought you realised.” “ Damn!” Ramas hit the wall angrily. “ Sorry,” Sally offered nervously, running her hands through back her short dark curls, as she did whenever she was unsure of something. He turned back to her. “ It’s not your fault. I should have made sure. But it means that I just questioned a child without a parent present and I didn’ t offer counsel or.... anything. I just thought...” “ That he wanted to talk? He did. He came to you. He needed to talk now, not in several hours.” Ramas sighed and accepted the fact. “ Did he tell you anything else?” he asked getting back to business. “ He didn’t tell me anything. Yesterday his mother called and said that he would be at home today and would I check in on him. I got there and McKenzie was home. He said that Laura had taken Lucas to the doctor. Then he helped me unpack the shopping. He just wanted me out, that much was clear. So I left and Lucas was waiting for me in the parking lot. He just asked if I could take him somewhere. Then he told me to drive here.” She blinked back a few tears. “ Is everything going to be OK? I mean...” “ We’ll make sure that Lucas is safe if that’s what you mean. He hasn’t done anything wrong- well, not in the circumstances, but McKenzie is going to be facing some charges if this is all true. We’ll get someone to go through the data on Lucas’ computer and the hack, then we’ll see. I’ll need to go and talk to my boss in a minute about that. Can we get in contact with his mother or the father?” “ You could try her office or the flat. His father- well, I’ll give you the numbers. Maybe you can get through,” she said bitterly. Ramas handed her a note pad to write the numbers down on. “ Thanks. I go and explain things to the lieutenant. We’ll be back in a moment. If there’s anything that you or Lucas want, just ask anyone.” He smiled and started to turn. “ Thank you,” Sally stopped him, smiling back finally. “ He deserves more than this. Much more.” “ Everyone does.” The police woman opened the door for her and she looked around. “ Thanks,” she said. “ No problem. Anything else you want, you just ask, OK?” Sally smiled at her as she closed the door. She sat down carefully next to Lucas and handed him a cup of coffee. “ It’s terrible, but it’ll do you good,” she coaxed. He sipped slowly, enjoying the warmth and, happily, oblivious to the taste. “ Are they going to arrest me?” he asked without emotion. “ Of course not. It’s going to be fine,” she lied weakly. Lucas looked at her. “ I’m fed up of people lying when everyone knows that it’s a lie.” “ OK. I’m sorry,” she told him. He looked across at her for a while. “ Thank you for everything.” They had been sitting in silence, Lucas staring up at the ceiling glad that he was now too tired to be able to think and that all there was left was a sort of grey lack of thought. The door opened and Ramas came back in with another, older man, overweight, with greying hair, still thick, and knowing eyes. “ Lucas, Sally, this is Lieutenant Rodley, he’s in charge of the computer fraud division. We need to get a few more details and then talk about where we have to go from here,” Ramas explained pleasantly as they sat opposite the two on the couch. “ I see you tried the coffee- and survived. Congratulations.” Sally smiled tiredly, without much enthusiasm. “ We need to wait until your mother gets here before we ask any more questions,” Rodley looked pointedly at Ramas, who blushed and avoided his eyes. “ I don’t want to wait,” Lucas objected. “ Well, that’s the law- your rights.” “ Well, I waive them.” Rodley smiled. “ Sally’s here; she’ll look after my best interests much better than my mother. My mother will just lie about everything. Look I’ll sign something if that’s what you need, but I want to talk about this now and without my mother. Can’t I talk to you if I want to especially when my mother can’t be impartial?” Rodley smiled. “ I guess so long as you have a lawyer, and someone who is willing to be responsible for you, it will be OK.” “ I don’t have a lawyer, but you can get me one, right?” Lucas asked. “ Yes. I think Marie’s in the office. If you accept her as your counsel then we can proceed.” “ Fine. I don’t care. I just wait to get this over with,” he said bleakly. Rodley turned to Ramas. “ Can you ask Marie to come in?” He turned back to Lucas. “ I’ll let you talk to her and she’ll go over the legal stuff with the two of you. When you’re ready you can call us in again. We’ll get to work analysing your computer, the records of transactions, in the mean time.” A middle aged woman in a smart suit came in a few moments later and they introduced themselves. Marie explained the legalities of the situation and Sally agreed to stand in loco parentis. “ You just have to sign here,” she pointed with a bitten finger nail to the correct line on the document and Sally signed. “ Is that it?” Lucas asked tiredly. “ That’s it. Are you sure you don’t want to wait to talk to the Lieutenant? They won’t mind.” Lucas shook his head firmly. “ OK then. Any last questions? I’ll go and call them in.” She got up and went to the door. Lucas looked across at Sally. “ Thank you,” his voice was earnest and deeply grateful. She squeezed his hand. “ Hang in there.” The door opened again and Marie returned with Ramas and Rodley. “ If we’re all set... Why did your step father come to you to help him?” “ I’m good at computers,” Lucas answered simply, used to people not crediting someone of his age with his abilities. Rodley raised his eyebrows. “ Very good.” “ Bank security is a bit harder than some small researcher’s systems,” he pointed out. “ I know.” “ But you could break their codes?” “ And hide from their detection systems.” He was too tired to be patient with this attitude. “ Want me to demonstrate?” he asked sarcastically. “ I’ll take your word for it.” Luckily Rodley seemed more amused than irritated by his attitude. “ It’s just we don’t get too many hackers that are quite so young.” “ So what happens now?” Sally questioned Rodley impatiently. “ Well, we need to analyse your actions from your computer and the files and we’ll need a full statement. Ramas will help you with that when we’re finished. After that, if all this checks out, we will arrest McKenzie. Then we press charges. You’ll probably be asked to give evidence.” Rodley looked at Lucas, trying to gauge his reaction, but he remained impassive. “ We’ve contacted your mother at work and she’ll be here in a while.” Lucas looked up at this, relieved that she was safe and hadn’t gone home, but it did remind him of something else. “ Before I get on with the questions do you have anything else that you want to ask?” Lucas looked at Marie who simply smiled at him warmly. He shook his head. “ Let’s get this statement done then.” Lucas led them slowly through what had happened, talking in a slow monotone, thinking carefully, but making sure that he didn’t let himself feel at the same time, keeping his eyes on the table that Ramas had drawn up so that the computer could take down the conversation and type up the statement for them. “ It think that’s everything then.” Ramas nodded and turned the screen to Lucas and Marie. They each read and then nodded in turn. “ You just have to sign it then.” Ramas passed him the mouse/ pen and pushed the screen closer. Lucas leant over it, writing carefully, forgetting that to do so he had taken his hand away from his throat, revealing the deep purple bruises already coming up. Ramas, Marie and Sally looked shocked, but quickly regained their composure before Lucas realised and looked up. “ Lucas, can I see?” Marie asked gently. He looked at her, about to refuse and then submitted to her examination. “ Can we arrange for a doctor to check him out?” Marie asked Rodley, who nodded. “ We’ll need her to document this,” he told Lucas as he started to protest. He nodded miserably, embarrassed. Then he took a deep breath. Nearly there. “ I want a restraining order against McKenzie for me and my mother,” Lucas looked up at Rodley, determined and angry. He glanced across at Marie and she nodded in strong agreement. “ We can arrange that for you, but your mother has to ask for herself,” the lieutenant explained. “ She won’t. She’ll just lie and say that nothing happened. She always pretends that nothing’s happened and half of the time she actually believes it,” Lucas told him angrily. “ Has your step father actually threatened or hurt her?” “ He hit her when she told him to let me go.” “ Has that happened before?” Rodley persisted. “ No. But...” He trailed off, tired and fighting hard to do this. “ I’ll talk to her and see what I can do,” Rodley compromised “ Talk to her! She won’t listen, she’ll go back and then... You have to do something! You can’t just let her go back. What if something happens? What is he...” He stopped fighting his emotions. “If you want me to help you you have to promise me that she will be safe,” he said as calmly as he could, trying to make it sound like a threat that he could carry through with. “ I’ll make sure that she does’t go back to the appartment. There is nothing more I can do, or I would. I’m sorry, but that’s the law.” “ OK.” Lucas accepted this, knowing that he couldn’t do anything more.“ Is there anything else?” he asked, exhausted. “ No. That’s it. I’ll get the doctor to come in and see you now and then you ’ll probably want to get some rest. We can arrange for somewhere for you to stay or for you to go home.” “ I don’t want to go home. Can I stay here?” Everything was strange enough without having to leave and go somewhere new, again; this room was just starting to feel safe. He especially didn’t want to be among a lot of people at the moment, definitely not complete strangers. “ I’m afraid you can’t stay in this building, but we’ve got plenty of other places. They’re really not too bad and you’ll be perfectly safe there,” Ramas told him gently. “ Would you prefer to stay with me?” Sally offered consolingly and Lucas smiling eagerly. “ I mean if that’s OK?” she asked Marie and Rodley. They looked at each other for a moment, silently coming to an agreement. That should be fine,” Rodley replied slowly. “ We’ve got your address, but we would want you to stay there or at least consult us before going anywhere.” “ Of course,” she agreed. “ Well, once the doctor has seen you, you can go. I think we should talk again tomorrow. We’ll have the computer analysed by then and we should have spoken to Mrs. McKenzie. DO you want her to know where you are?” Lucas thought for a moment. “ No. I’ll talk to her tomorrow, here.” “ How’s eleven for everyone?” Rodley asked and they all nodded Then Rodley, Ramas and Marie left, the last two smiling at Lucas first. “ Are you sure that’s OK with you?” Lucas asked Sally. “ I mean you’ve helped so much already...” “ Sometimes it’s OK to ask for help and get it; and I’m glad to give it. It’ s a compliment to be asked, you know,” she reminded him, grinning. Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998 ,1999 Date: Sun, 28 Mar 1999 20:57:53 +0100 From: Alexia/Sabrina Subject: Repost: A House of Windows: Part 2a Sender: owner-tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu To: seaquest-ff@quixotic.org, sqfanfic@onelist.com, tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu Reply-to: Alexia/Sabrina X-Mailer: Microsoft Outlook Express 4.72.3110.1 Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999 Part 2 Sally unlocked the door and flicked on the lights as she went in. “ I’ll just put some water on and then I’ll show you around. It’s not very elegant, but it’s mostly tidy at the moment. Greg is away visiting his family, otherwise it wouldn’t be. I’m afraid the other room isn’t very big, but it’s pretty comfortable.” Lucas shut the door carefully and looked around the colourful, lived-in apartment. There were lots of plants, herbs and exotic flowers in pots hanging in corners and from the ceiling. He sat down nervously on the edge of a large padded footrest and listened to Sally’s gentle voice, the words unclear because of the running water, as she filled a saucepan and put it on the cooker to heat. Then she came back into the room with a glass of water. “ You have to take another one of these now,” she told him handing him a small pill. “ It’ll help with the swelling. I don’t want to have to take you to hospital in the middle of the night,” she said, as he looked at it dubiously. He made a wry face and swallowed, painfully. “ I thought I’d make pasta. It’s easy to swallow.” She stood and gestured for him to follow her. “ OK, your room is this way. That’s the bathroom... Here are some towels. Anything else you need just yell. I’m sure I can find some toothpaste and a tooth brush somewhere around here and my brother left some night clothes in the cupboard for when he stays. They’ll be way too big, but it’ll do for tonight. Tomorrow I’ll see if I can go and pick up some things from your place to make you more comfortable.” She looked around the room satisfied and then wagged her finger at him as he opened his mouth to speak. “ Just one more thing. Stop saying thank you.” He gave her a slight and followed her back into the other room to set the table. He didn’t remember much of dinner: what they talked about over it, if they even did talk, or falling into bed, but strangely he slept soundly and peacefully for eleven hours. When he woke up sunlight had turned the curtains into glowing sheets of gold. He got up slowly and wandered into the kitchen. “ Sleep well?” Sally asked cheerfully. “ Yes.” It came out as a quiet croak. “ Can I have some tea or something?” he whispered. “ Sure. How are you feeling?” she asked, concerned. “ I think I just need a drink.” She passed him a cup and another pill and after a while he found he could speak again. “ What time is it?” “ Ten. I was just about to wake you up.” When they arrived back at the police station, they went back up to Ramas office and sat at the end of the hall, until they were shown into the correct room where they waited. Ramas and Marie smiled as they came into the room a few minutes later and sat down. “ How’re you doing?” Ramas asked Lucas. “ OK,” he said, not sounding too sure. Rodley came in and, looking around briskly, got down to business, throwing himself into a groaning chair. “Well, our analyst agrees with everything you ’ve told us and we think that the information on your computer is enough evidence to go to trial with. How are you feeling about that? Still willing to give evidence, because we will need you to.” Lucas nodded. “ Good. McKenzie was arrested this morning and charges are being filed against him now. We expect him to make bail later today. We hurried the restraining order through and the judge agreed earlier this morning.” Rodley paused. “ I talked to your mother, but I’m afraid that she didn’t want to take my advice to do the same.” He looked at the floor uncomfortably. “ She also denied that any of this took place yesterday, that she was even home until gone nine o’clock.” He looked across at Lucas, who looked sad but not surprised. “ But we checked with the concierge and the parking lot attendant and with the people at her office. They all said that she left work around three and returned less than an hour later with a hand mark on her cheek.” “ Is she all right?” “ Apart from the fact that she lied in her statement, yes. Don’t worry, we’ re not going to charge her with perjury or anything like that,” he reassured him as Lucas leant forward worried at his tone. “ There’s nothing else we need from you right now, but we thought that you might like someone to pick up some things from your place. If you give Ramas a list he’ll arrange it. We have people over there searching the apartment anyway, so we can get it today. Apart from that, unless there’s anything you need to ask...” “ When can I talk to my mother?” Lucas asked resignedly. Rodley and Ramas exchanged looks, briefly. “ I’m afraid that she has already left and asked that she not be contacted.” Lucas nodded. “ But she’s not at the flat, with him?” “ No. We made sure that she was safe.” “ Thanks,” Lucas said with difficulty. “ I appreciate your... understanding about her.” “ I can’t say that I understand, but that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t serve and protect,” Rodley replied sympathetically. “ I’ve talked to the judge and the trial will be as private as possible. Your name will not be part of public record. It should only take a day or so and we’ll contact you when we know when we’ll need you. The prosecutor will want to go over your testimony first and also Ms. Kellerman’s. I’m afraid that there will also have to be a hearing about you and your safety. The judge isn’t too sure about your mother keeping custody, but we’re still having problems contacting your father.” Lucas sighed, not surprised. “ Can I stay will Sally for the moment though, I mean if that’s all right with you?” He turned to her, embarrassed to take this for granted. Sally nodded. “ We think that would probably be the best thing for the moment,” Marie agreed. “I’ll come and talk to you later today about the trial and everything else. I just want to get some more details first. I think I’d better read through the divorce case to see what our options are. Do you have any other close family, on either parent’s side? Grandparents, aunts?” “ No. At least none that I know about or that we’ve talked to in years.” “ That’s OK. I’ll be over after lunch, then.” The trial proceeded two days later. Lucas requested that McKenzie not be in the room while he was giving evidence. The judge was firm but encouraging, the only problem coming when Lucas was asked to demonstrate his hacking abilities by the defense. The lawyer knew that they only way they could get out of the diffiulties over the assult allegations was to prove the boy a liar over the computer parts, without that the jury was sure to convict. “ Do you seriously expect us to believe that an 11- year- old can hack into one of the country’s largest banks, take out thousands of dollars, hide the fact that they were even in the system and then make it seem like the account holder took out the funds? I don’t know of anyone who can do this, let alone some child. Dr. McKenzie is a world renowned scientist. Leaving aside the fact that he has conducted some of the most successful and important research in the last decade can we honestly believe that he would risk his whole career on something like this? Can we believe that he would go to his 11- year- old stepson and ask him to do something which no one could seriously believe him capable of? I put it to you that this is no more than an child’s attempt at revenge on any sort of father figure near to him...” The judge held up a hand. “ Can you ‘hack’ a system and do these things?” he asked Lucas seriously. “ Yes,” he replied bluntly. The ‘child’ comment and the lawyer’s whole attitude stung and he wasn’t about to let it pass rom some pompous and arrogant idiot who was wrong anyway... and he could prove it. “ Do you understand the term perjury?” the defense asked. “ Isn’t that badgering the witness?” Lucas turned to the judge, smiling mischievously. The judge’s eyes smiled but he answered gravely. “ There’s a simple solution to this problem. Would you demonstrate these abilities for us?” The few people in the courtroom whispered, quickly falling silent as the judge glared at them. “ So long as you agree not to press charges,” Lucas returned. The judge looked between the prosecutor and the defense. “ Do you both agree to this trial?” “ Yes, your honour,” they answered in perfect unison and glared at each other. The judge turned back to Lucas. “ I’ll need my computer, or one with the same speed and power,” Lucas told him, confident and self assured, secure in his belief in his abilities. The judge nodded. “ Bailiff please bring in exhibit F and place it in front of the witness. Do you need a... power supply?” he asked carefully, searching for the term. Lucas shook his head. “ It’s solar powered and there’s plenty of light in here.” “ So what proof do you need that Mr Wolenczak is capable of what he claims?” the judge queried the defense. “ Well, I could hack into your bank account,” Lucas offered. “ Or maybe the defence would prefer that we use his as an example?” He felt strangely elated, was almost having fun. None of it seemed real, more like some bizarre game. He didn’t feel that he was giving evidence in a trial to send McKenzie to prison, rather he was proving his prowess to an annoying adult that was constantly patronising him. All he felt was the thrill of a competition he knew he could win. The bailiff returned and placed the computer in front of him. “ What do you want me to hack?” “ I think your suggestion of the defense’s bank account should convince him.” Lucas nodded. “ I need his full name, date of birth and the name of the bank... I can do it without,” he added as the lawyer got up to object, “But it’ll take me a few minutes longer while I search for it. And I did have the researcher’s facts,” he pointed out. “ Counsellor?” “ Ian Richard Evens, 11/4/70, National.” The judge turned back to Lucas. “ It might take a while. I can’t tell how long. It depends on what the system is like.” The judge nodded. “ If it takes too long or we need a break we can recess. You can start when you’re ready.” Lucas opened the laptop waiting while it booted up. He looked at Evens and his grin of contempt and started typing. It only took five minutes to get into the first level of the bank’s system. Another half an hour and he was at Evens’ account and running passwords/ passcodes. Another fifteen minutes and he was half way through. “ Your honour, are we going to sit here all day? I think that this has gone on long enough.” “ I need another 15 minutes max,” Lucas replied without looking up and the judge nodded. Another ten and Lucas sighed. The Defence started to do his Cheshire cat gloat. “ Where do you want me to put the money for the moment?” Lucas asked. “ Feel like making a donation to charity? You might not get it back in that case, but...” “ Counsellor?” The judge asked, raising his eye brows. “ I don’t believe this.” The lawyer hurried over to the bench and Lucas pushed the monitor around for him to look at. “ Your honour, this is some sort of hoax. We don’t know what files he had already on the machine...” “ Do you want me to tell you your password and pass code? Your current balance? How much your lunch cost on your Visa card?” The lawyer opened and shut his mouth. The judge pointed to his seat and he sat deflated. “ It think that that resolves that issue. Let the court understand that the witness has successfully hacked into the defence lawyer’ s bank account with ability to transfer funds. Are there any other questions for this witness?” The defence shook his head and then bestirred himself to stand. “ No, your honour,” he said blankly. “ Witness is excused. I think you’d better close down that file before you leave the stand and I would encourage the defence to change his codes when he gets out of court. No slight meant to the witness’ integrity,” he added smiling. “ OK. I’m out,” Lucas moved the monitor around to demonstrate. “ Witness is dismissed. Thank you for your co-operation in helping us clear up our little disagreement.” Lucas grinned. “ It was fun. I don’t often get a judge’s permission to hack a bank.” “ You do understand that today’s request for you to demonstrate your ‘abilities’ should in no way be regarded as encouragement to repeat this.” “ Yes, Sir.” “ Court will recess for one hour.” “ You didn’t need to be quite so gleeful about it,” Marie reprimanded as they sat waiting in a side room, the next day, for the verdict. She had been surpirsed by his attitude of defience, his attitude towards the defense and seeming lightheartness throughout the whole proceedings. She could understand how someone of his intellignce could be made very angry by such patronising and distainful treatment. But she also realised that his attitude towards the defense was his only way at getting back at McKenzie and that a large part was simply to protect his vulnerabliity and to isolate him from the reality of the situation and what he was doing by testifying. The jury had come back in after only two hours debate. The doors opened and the prosecutor came in. “ Eight year sentence, possibility of parole after four,” she told them happily. Marie turned to Lucas. “ How do you feel about it. Are you OK?” she asked gently. “ I don’t know,” he replied honestly. “ It doesn’t feel like anything just happened.” He looked at her puzzled and questioning. “ It’s OK. You’ve just been having a hard time. You’ll get it in a few days. Just remember that you did the right thing: for you, your mum and all the people who are going to benefit from this drug.” She squeezed his hand reassuringly. “ I’m very grateful for all your help. We needed your testimony and it was the right thing to do,” the prosecutor put in. There was a knock at the door. “ That’ll be our next meeting,” Marie told the other lawyer. “ Well, thanks again. I’m off for an early weekend.” She smiled as she left, holding the door for the other woman to enter. Laura looked pale and tired, as if she hadn’t slept enough and had been living mainly on coffee for the last few days. He hadn’t seen or talked to her since that day in the appartment as she hadn’t been at the trial. She looked nervously between them, glances that quickly fell back to contemplation of the table. She sat on the edge of her chair, fidgeting. “ Are you all right?” Lucas asked carefully. Laura ignored him and turned to Marie. “ I’m here to discuss custody. I want to relinquish my rights.” “ Mrs. McKenzie, wouldn’t you rather wait until your lawyer arrives before we discuss this?” “ No. I told him not to come. I know what I want- what I think is best. I don’t want custody anymore and I don’t think that it would be the right thing for you either. Can I talk to my son alone, please?” Marie looked at Lucas. “ Stay,” he whispered and she nodded. “ I’m sorry that won’t be possible, but I want you to feel free to say anything that you wish. It will not leave this room.” “ I can’t understand why you had to lie like that, why...” Lucas looked at her aghast. He couldn’t believe that she was going to pretend it had never happened. Marie had told him that the defence refused to put her on the stand because he knew that she would lie blatantly. He arranged for her to be excused for medical reasons, and the prosecutor had been satisfied not to have a hysterical and unreliable witness to deal with. She looked up at him and her eyes flooded. She took a deep breath and seemed to clear something away from her thoughts. “I know why you did this and I can understand that you needed to protect yourself, but I can’t continue to look after you. I haven’t been able to do it in the past, otherwise we wouldn’t be in this situation and I think I would do worse in the future and however much I can understand what you did I... I can’t... I need to do this. I’m sorry.” She got up and left then, not looking back. Marie let Lucas sit in silence, too shocked for the tears filling his eyes to fall. He swallowed hard. At least she had told him the truth, though it had clearly been an effort and she had ever actually said what had happened. It was just so unfair that he had done it- not all, but a lot of it- to protect her. At least she couldn’t go back to McKenzie and get hurt now. He didn’t doubt that she would have and if anything had happened she would have just ignored it and carried on, so he supposed that even though she couldn’t forgive him it was better for her, if he really loved her. He just wished that she had lied this time, just stuck to the line that she had let him down and that she didn’t want to risk doing it again, but he knew that her real reason for doing this was because she didn’t want to be around him and she didn’t care about what he wanted. Basically she just wasn’t able to care enough about him. What is so wrong about me? I tried to do the right thing! “ I know it doesn’t make things any easier, but you did do the right thing. And this is about her shortcomings not yours. You did nothing wrong and have nothing to be ashamed of,” Marie told him forcefully. “ Then why don’t any of the people who are meant to care about me want me around?” he asked furiously. “ What is so wrong with me?” “ Nothing. Nothing at all. You’re great. It’s them. I know that it’s hard to accept that, but it’s them.” “ Everyone? It doesn’t add up. I’ve done the math; it doesn’t make sense. Three parents and one of me and none of them want me around. Now doesn’t it seem like it’s me rather than them?” “ It’s horrible, terrible luck and they’re completely stupid not to want you around...” “ Go away.” Marie looked at him for a moment, trying to judge whether he really meant it. “ Please?” She waited and less than a minute later he let her hold him as he cried. After a long time he stopped, exhausted, but the pain wasn’t less and the aching loneliness hadn’t eased. There was just nothing left. After that she lead him to a quiet room with a couch and let him sleep. She woke him a few hours later. “ We have to go to the hearing now.” He frowned at her for a moment, still waking up and then nodded miserably. He stretched and let her lead him to the hearing room. The same judge was already waiting, finishing his lunch. “ Only place where I can get some peace and quiet,” he smiled warmly at them as they sat. Lucas stared out of the window. What happens now? Where do I go now that Laura doesn’t want me around? It felt easier to think of her by her name rather than as his mother. The courtroom door opened and a young man hurried in and started setting out papers on the next table. The judge looked at the clock. The hearing was due to start in three minutes. The door opened again and two middle aged men in smart, expensive suits walked in briskly. Lucas stared at the second man blankly, then with astonishment, before literally jumping up and throwing himself on him. “ Dad!” he cried delightedly. Dr. Wolenczak held his son tightly for a moment and then held him apart, looking at the judge. He smiled briefly at Lucas. “ I think the judge wants to start and we’d better not keep him waiting.” Lucas nodded and sat down again beside Marie, this time with a new sort of happy, hopeful glow. Marie smiled, watching this. Then they all focused on the bench as the judge screwed up his sandwich bag and threw it at the bin, missing by at least ten metres. A security guard discreetly retrieved it and placed it in it’s intended destination. The judge frowned and looked down at each of them in turn. He gaze rested on the young man at the furthest table. The young lawyer obediently got up. “ Frederick Jones, your honour. I’m here to represent Mrs. McKenzie at these proceedings.” “ And where is Mrs.McKenzie?” “ She was unable to attend due to personal difficulties, but I have a statement of her wishes...” The judge made an impatient movement for him to continue. “ Mrs McKenzie would like to relinquish all custodial rights to her son, so that he might be placed in more suitable care.” “ Anything else? Visitation rights?” “ Nothing, your honour. She simply asked that the court appoint whatever guardian it deemed appropriate to continue to care for him.” The judge frowned darkly. “ Court acknowledges Mrs. McKenzie’s decision but would like to note that it would have been more appropriate for her to be present, even under the circumstances. If you have nothing more to add you are excused. If Mrs McKenzie has any further requests for information she should put them to her son’s lawyer or that of his appointed guardian.” “ Yes, Sir.” The young lawyer quickly reassembled his papers and left. Dr. Wolenczak had turned to his lawyer and they were speaking quickly in whispers. They seemed to come to an agreement and then turned back to the bench. “ And you are Dr. Wolenczak?” The judge asked. The second lawyer rose and gave assent. “ After discussing this matter with your son’s lawyer and taking due consideration of all the facts it seems that you are the most suitable person to have custody of your son. Do you think that you can and are willing to accept this responsibility?” “ Yes, your honour,” the second lawyer replied. The judge looked down at Lucas who was smiling dazedly and then quickly at Marie, who nodded happily to him. “ Then I grant you full custody of your son. Make sure you fill your responsibility properly,” he added warningly. “ Yes, your honour. Thank you,” Dr. Wolenczak answered for himself. “ Dismissed.” Wolenczak shook hands with his lawyer as Lucas turned smiling to Marie. Thank you so much, for everything.” “ You’re very welcome. Good luck. You have my number if there’s anything more you need. Make sure you use it.” “ I will.” He looked at her shyly for a moment and then hugged her quickly. “ Take care,” she called as she left, feeling that there had been a happy ending. The second lawyer held the door for her and then Lucas was alone with his father in the courtroom. “ I didn’t think you’d come!” Lucas said still in shock and then went red. I didn’t mean...” “ That’s all right. I haven’t exactly been around much.” “ It’s just that I can never get through to you,” Lucas tried to explain. “ I know and I’m sorry.” “ I’m just so glad you’re here,” Lucas smiled at him earnestly. “ So am I.” “ I’ve arranged for someone to go to the flat and pick up your things. I’m afraid that we have to get straight on a plane now.” Lucas didn’t want to leave quite yet. He hadn’t said good bye to Sally or to... but there wasn’t anyone else that he really cared about that much. He did have friends at school, but they were always so in awe of him or so terminally pissed off about his intelligence that relationships were always strained, to say the least. And he didn’t want to have to go back to the flat. He sighed and looked out of the window of the expensive company car as it took them towards the airport. He didn’t want to leave yet because everything seemed new and he wanted the security of things he knew: routines, places, anything that was normal. But at least his father would be there and that was something he had wanted more than anything for a long time. “ I’ve got to go to a meeting when we land, but there will be someone to pick you up and take you home, show you around. If there’s anything you need or want, just ask and Jerry’ll sort it out. When I get back we’ll need to talk about somethings like school and work. I’m sorry about this, but I’m in the middle of a really big project and I wasn’t exactly expecting any of this.” “ That’s OK. I think I’ll just want to sleep when we arrive.” The plane ride was very quick and comfortable. While his father worked on his laptop Lucas stared out of the window at the coast line as they flew past. It was a clear sunny day and the contours rose up in sharp definition and the water was clear and sapphire, from the air. He was always surprised at how beautiful nature was and how he never failed to be happy looking at it even when everything else was horrible. But, now at least, it wasn’t. In fact he was looking forward to being happier than in a long time. He hadn’t realised that he had drifted off into sleep, but the next thing he knew was his father gently shaking his shoulder and telling him that they had landed. He stretched happily, though somewhat groggily and watched the airport buildings pass as they taxied in to their gate. The security checks were very quick, as it was a local flight and they had only carry- on luggage, so they were out into the lobby within minutes. His father waved at two young men in suits waiting by the doors. “ Lucas, this is Jerry. He’ll be taking you home and helping you sort out anything you need. Are you OK?” “ Yeah.” “ Good. I’ll see you later then.” And he was off with the second man. Lucas turned back to Jerry. He was in his early thirties with light brown hair, sunglasses to hide his eyes and clearly eager to be of help. “ The car’s over here,” he indicated and they walked over slowly. “ Like your father said, if there’s anything you need, just ask.” “ Thanks. Right now I’m just tired.” Jerry smiled and opened the door for him. The car was comfortable and spacious with black leather faux seats and tinted windows. Jerry got in and they pulled away as he chatted inanely about the city and the buildings that they passed. Shortly, they pulled up in front of a very smart, very new apartment building. “ You’re in the penthouse.” Jerry grinned, leading him through the entrance and to the main desk. The receptionist looked up smiling brightly. “ This is Lucas Wolenczak. He’ll be joining his father in Apartment 5011.” “ That’s right. Would you like a key?” “ That would be great,” Jerry answered for him. “ If you would just stand in front of the security camera for a second we can put your picture on our systems.” Lucas nodded and complied staring at the small box high on the wall. “ Thank you. OK, that’s it.” She smiled again, fixedly. “ Thanks.” Jerry took the key and lead him to the elevators and then down the corridor and into the apartment. His first impression was of light and space. The first room was a corner one and two walls were windows looking out across the city. “ It’s an incredible view, isn’t it?” Lucas nodded gazing across the buildings and the parks in between and finally over to the ocean, a shining ribbon before the sky. “ Your father said that you should have this room,” Jerry told him and he pulled himself away from the view to follow him. The room was somewhat bare from not being lived in, but was roomy and comfortable looking. “ There’s a bathroom off on the left and the kitchen is in the next room to the main one. Apart from that you’ll probably want to explore by yourself later.” Lucas flopped down on the bed and closed his eyes. “ Well I’ll be around so if you need anything just call or come and find me in the main room.” Lucas sat up and smiled. “ Thanks. I’m just really tired. If I’m still asleep when my father comes back could you wake me up?” “ Sure. Sleep well.” He did, fully dressed and on top of the covers, but it was all so soft and comfortable that he didn’t notice and it felt safe here in this light apartment high above the rest of the city. As soon as he had some of his own things here it would be perfect. He looked at the clock on the wall, surprised to see that he’d slept for five hours. He wandered into the main room and Jerry looked up grinning. “ I was beginning to wonder if you were dead or something.” Lucas sat down opposite him. “ I think the meeting’s still going on. They’ve been very busy lately. You want some food or something? There’s a great Italian place across the street and we an leave a message at the front desk for if you’re father comes back.” “ Actually I’m starving. That would be fine.” He looked around once more, contented. “ Great.” “ So, you thought about where you want to go to school here?” Jerry asked over a mouthful of Linguini. “ No, I don’t really know what the options are.” “ But you didn’t mind leaving the other place much?” Lucas grinned. “ I didn’t really fit in. I mean, most of the time people really hated me for being smart and then rest of the time they were kind of... they just didn’t get it, or me. I don’t know. Maybe I could skip a few more grades. Trying to stay with my age group hasn’t worked, so I guess it’s worth trying it. Probably just another way to not fit in,” he added wryly and sighed. “ I heard you were pretty good with computers,” Jerry said, neatly changing the subject. “ I heard about that thing with the defence lawyer. That would have been great to see.” Lucas smiled softly thinking about Evens’ face. You know I can never figure out how to work the....” And the next few hours passed quickly, in talking about everything and anything to do with computers. After a while the frowns from the waiter got through to them and Jerry paid the bill and they left, crossing the street to the apartment building. “ Is Dr Wolenczak in yet?” Lucas stopped to ask the receptionist. “ Not yet,” she replied still smiling and Lucas continued towards the elevators. Lucas played around with the television controls not finding anything of interest on any of the channels. After a while Jerry tried to get him interested in helping him with a program on his lap top, but Lucas resolved it so quickly that he was at a loss as to what to suggest next. “ Is he always this busy?” Lucas asked finally, knowing the answer, but angry anyway. He sighed and got up before Jerry could find an answer. Sorry. I’m just kinda of... getting used to things.” He tried forcing a smile. “ Guess I’ll go and sleep again.” Although he had slept a lot already, sleep came easily and, after a short rush of disconnected images, peacefully. He hadn’t closed the curtains, so when he woke the room was flooded with warm sunlight and he smiled as he showered, dressed and then made his way down the corridor. The wall that separated the kitchen from the main room had somehow shortened so that the two rooms merged. His father looked up smiling as he poured out coffee. “ Want some?” he asked smiling. “ Yes, please.” Lucas sat down on a stool on the opposite side of the counter, spread with a basket of breads and muffins and one of fruit. “ Help yourself to what you want. If you prefer cereal or...” “ This is fine. Thanks,” Lucas replied biting into a dark peach. “ How did the meeting go?” “ Well, we got everything sorted out, eventually. I’m sorry it took so long but the investors weren’t pleased to have to reschedule it. We’re just in the final stages of signing a huge geothermal energy project. Jerry sorted everything out for you?” Lucas nodded, his mouth full. “ He’ll be back again later on. First of all I wanted to discuss things with you. We need to find you a school. I’ve talked to a friend of mine who is on the board at a very good one in the city. He says that you have a place there if you like it. One thing your mother did send me were school reports. It’s up to you, but I think you’d do better off moving into a higher grade. But when you go to the school, you can talk to Bill about that. He’ll have a better idea of what would be the best thing. I’m afraid that I really don’t know much about the education system anymore. I arranged for us to go and see him in...” he looked at his watch, “ an hour. Does that sound OK to you?” “Fine.” “ Good. That’s the first thing.” He paused taking a long drink of the strong, aromatic coffee. “ We need to talk about our... arrangements here. I want you to know that I’m very happy to have you here but it was unexpected and I have some work commitments that I can’t drop at this stage.” He looked at Lucas earnestly, reassured when he smiled back. “ I understand and that’s fine. I just don’t want to be a pain or anything.” “ You’re not, believe me,” Wolenczak said forcefully. “It’s going to take some getting used to: new city, new school, new everything and I might not be able to be here as much as I would like for a while, but Jerry will be here or someone else and if there’s anything you need you only have to ask.” He sighed. “ I’m not sure that I’m going to make a very good parent. Honestly, I don’t know how and... I will do my best, but I don’t want to promise anything that I won’t be able to deliver. Just don’t think that it’s not because I don’t care.... we’ll manage right?” He waited for Lucas’ reaction nervously. “ Right.” Lucas smiled at him trustingly. “ It’ll work out fine.” Part 3 The school was beautiful, with open grass lawns, trees, flowers, bushes in between the various buildings and a very well equipped computer room. Lucas was clearly delighted and gradually his father relaxed as he watching his son smiling as they looked around. After that he introduced Lucas to his friend and they started to discuss the options. Dr. Platt was clearly impressed and soon suggested that Lucas talk to some of the teachers so that they would be able to get a better idea of how to place him. After all that, it was agreed that Lucas would go into the last year of the school on a trial basis. Bill pulled Lawrence aside at the end. “ He doesn’t really need to do this year, but it’ll probably be better for him. Give him some time to adjust. After that I’m pretty sure that any college would accept him.” “ You mean for next year?” Lawrence asked surprised. Bill nodded seriously. “ I just hope we can keep him busy for one year here. It will be hard for him, being so much younger, but it would be just as hard with his peers. Besides it would be such a waste not letting him explore and expand his mind for the next several years and he seems very mature. I’m sure that together we can handle it.” “ I really appreciate this, Bill. It’s all rather... unexpected. I think he’ s coping better with everything than I am. I’m just afraid that I won’t be able to provide much emotional support. I just want to run a mile especially after all that’s happened, and I know he needs me more because of it. I’m just not sure that it’s something I know how to do.” “ Well, I think right now the most important thing is that he has somewhere to be and someone there.” “ I’m just afraid that I won’t be.” Jerry pulled the car over at the school gates. “ Ready?” “ I guess,” Lucas answered nervously, fiddling with the strap of his bag. I guess I’d better go,” he said unwillingly. “ Uhuh. Have a nice day.” Jerry laughed at his attitude and Lucas glared at him before getting out. “ I’ll be back here at four, OK?” “ Yeah,” came the glum answer and the car moved away. Lucas sighed and walked up to the gate, checking his ID through and then he walked across the lawn to his first class. Luckily he had already met the teacher, who had thought to show him where to go. He took a deep breath and then looked in through the open door of the classroom. This was a bad move! The students already waiting looked around at him and then away, then back again when they realised that he hadn’t gone. Maybe I’m better off with my age group even if it is deathly boring. At least I’m not too short for my age, just three of four inches shorter than most of these people who are all more than five years older. Sh**! What am I doing here? “ You lost?” A tall, blond haired girl asked, smiling sympathetically. He shook his head. Say something. “ Er... I’m here for a class.” Several of the guys sniggered in the background. “ Are you sure you have the right room?” she asked in a friendly voice, glaring admonishingly at her friends. “ Yeah. Dr. Peter’s showed me around a bit yesterday.” That stopped them grinning. “Um...I’m Lucas Wolenczak, I’m starting today.” Her face went blank then she smiled again, in a forced way, confused. “ Hi. I’m Rachel and that’s Susan, Greg and Andy,” she introduced, pointing. “ I don’t mean to sound... are you sure this is the right grade?” Lucas nodded uneasily. “They thought that I should skip a few grades...” “ Lucas, you found your way here.” Dr. Peter’s came in smiling at him. “ I guess you’ve met everyone, then. Well, mostly. We’re a small class. Dany and Richard will be along in a minute for their compulsory five minutes late.” The other slid off the desks and into seats. Rachel patted a chair next to her and Lucas sat uneasily. “ OK, we were working on designing an AI program for searching the internex. Did you bring your laptop?” Lucas nodded, getting it out and letting it boot up. Several of the others looked over at its features with surprise and envy. Dr. Peters turned on his computer in turn and the wall monitor behind him showed the current progress. He handed Lucas a connection cord. “ I’ll explain a bit about where we are, while you upload.” Lucas nodded and typed in the necessary command and then handed back the lead when the upload was complete, listening with interest. The solution became clear within minutes and he quickly entered it into his program. He looked around the room, uncertain whether he should just keep quiet. But in the end interest won out. After all, he couldn’t just keep quiet all year. Besides, he was feeling insulted and their laughter was provocation enough. By the end of the lesson it was clear that several people were not pleased that he had decided to contribute, though about half of the class seemed interested, intrigued and even impressed. Well, it could be a lot worse ad at least I’m not going to be bored to death for another year. It was hard trying to fit in. He got along with most people, but the age gap was a big problem socially and it took a term for the first ‘acceptance’ step to be complete. At least he had friends that he could talk to. They didn’t really invite him to go out much, but he was always included in study meetings and discussions. He didn’t care if they only accepted him because he could help them and teach them. It wasn’t great, but it was a big improvement. Dating with such an age gap was impossible, but it was good just to have friends where they actually talked about things that mattered. There were still people who were terminally pissed off with his intelligence, but mostly they avoided him and he them, so the year at school passed pleasantly and enjoyably. Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999 Date: Mon, 29 Mar 1999 21:06:20 +0100 From: Alexia/Sabrina Subject: Repost: A House of Windows: Part 2b Sender: owner-tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu To: seaquest-ff@quixotic.org, sqfanfic@onelist.com, tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu Reply-to: Alexia/Sabrina X-Mailer: Microsoft Outlook Express 4.72.3110.1 NB: the parts don't correspond to the part labelling within the story because I messed it up. I think this is where the last part left off... Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999 As his father had warned Lucas, he was very busy. At the beginning, he got home a few hours after dinner and left, in the mornings, before Lucas did. Then his arrivals got later and he left, again, earlier. Soon he was staying at work three nights a week and the other times Lucas barely saw him, if at all. At first, he phoned when he was going to be late or left a message, then the messages got fewer and fewer. Lucas gave up waiting for them and tried calling, but fewer and fewer calls got through. Then he started going off on trips for two weeks, three weeks at a time and at frequent intervals. Sure there was always someone around: Jerry- or his replacement, when he got fed up- or the replacement’s replacement. He couldn’t blame them for not wanting to stay longer. It wasn’t exactly what they had taken the job for. Although he got along with most of them and they were kind, helpful and sympathetic, they were still people being paid to look after him. They weren ’t people who chose to be there because of him. He had always believed that one thing you just did was love your parents- it was a fact, not even an obligation or a duty, it was so basic a truth. His father had never been around much, even previous to the divorce but he had been too young to question this as anything other than an unhappy necessity, simply a fact like love for him. It had never occurred to him at that age to feel anger or hurt for his absence. His mother had always worked so he was used to an endless stream of nannies, housekeepers, but she had always been around enough. As he had grown older the fact that he was sad his father wasn’t around had deepened in to hurt and resentment, but he was still too young to be able to openly feel anger towards his parents. After the divorce he had seen even less of him, very little, but there had been a reason for that and he could easily just fool himself with thinking that was just because he didn’t want to see Laura or because the visitation periods of course weren’t always convenient. He didn’t resent the divorce, rather welcomed it as and ending to the unpleasantness of endless fights, constant anger and the generally explosive mood of hurt and fury that had filled the house when they were living together. It had been easy to love in the absence without reserve as his father wasn’t there enough for him to see his faults. And when he did come home he was always nice, taking him out for treats, giving him presents that a child sees as the absolute proof of love, whereas really the gift is only a sign of love when the love is proven already. The very fact that he wasn’t there only made the idea of him more desirable. His father turning up at the courthouse had given him an option, somewhere to go when there was no nice alternative, and besides, he still believed that parents were just people you loved. The very fact that he had come, that he had dropped his business and come, asked to take him showed that he cared and a home where there was going to be love was beyond everything that he had expected at that point. He found himself fighting with the fact that, despite what he had always believed about loving your parents, he found himself not only hurt and sad at his father’s absence, but also resentful and blaming him. This shocked him as it was so far from what he’d always been taught and he fought unhappily with his anger, feeling that he was being not only unfair, but also disloyal to his obligations. He wanted to talk to someone about it, but he didn’t trust any of the replacements enough as he was too ashamed for himself for how he was feeling, trying to deal with alone. What he dreaded most were the holidays: his friends going off with their families, and he simply not having anywhere to go where he wouldn’t notice that he was alone. He had everything material that he could want and there were never a lack of people there to make sure that he had it, but it didn’t matter because they didn’t matter, they didn’t care and they would be gone in a month or so anyway. Somehow the fact that he had thought he’d finally found a place to be where he was wanted and then found that he was wrong was harder than not believing in the first place. And there still seemed to be the question of what made people not care, not want to be there. When he did work up the energy to talk to his father about it he could never get through, besides the fact that he was too scared of a confrontation. His father’s work didn’t diminish, but seemed to grow, so that Lucas began to wonder if he was simply staying away just to avoid him. He asked Jerry one day, but Jerry said that his father had been at the flat even less before he came. In the holidays he had taken to going over to the sea research centre. It was the place that his father had taken him to the week that he had arrived, the only place other than the school. The bright coloured fish were so relaxing and he loved sitting by the large aquariums for the mammals, watching the water’s effect on the walls, the calm peaceful blues and the dim light. He was tired of knowing that the latest replacement didn’t want to be there and felt sorry for him, so he’d been coming every day for the past week simply to sit underground by the glass-fronted aquarium and watch the water and the animals swimming happily, or work on a new programming problem. More and more, though, he found himself switching off from the problem at hand and reading through articles, reports- any information about the animals he was watching. Today was Sunday but, of course, there was no one at the flat. He didn’t think of it as home really, rather as a place he stayed and slept. He had laid aside his computer and watched a dolphin swimming close to the glass, cheered by its constant grin. “ Da** it!” someone shouted. He looked up. There was no one there, but a shower of loose papers was falling gracefully down the stair well in the corner, gliding out at angles. He got up and started to gather the fallen sheets. After a few minutes he was aware of someone working beside him and he turned. A flustered female researcher smiled distractedly at him as he handed her the papers that he had gathered so far. “ Thanks. I didn’t know that there was anyone down here.” She looked at him closely for a minute and then started gathering papers again. Then she looked back. “ Where have we met before?” she asked finally. “ We haven’t, but I’ve been hanging around here a lot lately,” he explained, picking up the last of the papers and handing them to her. “ I love watching them,” he told her gazing into the tank. “ It’s so peaceful and it helps me clear my head so I can think better.” They smiled at each other. “ I’ll make you a deal. You help me carry this stuff and I’ll give you a guided tour.” “ What and where?” Lucas grinned happily. “ Maybe you should be giving me the tour,” Lori laughed leaning against a tank. “ You seem to know more about some of this than I do.” Lucas blushed. “ I’ve been reading a lot and... well I love learning about it.” “ It’s nice to have someone who thinks of them as more than a ‘pretty fishy’ .” They both laughed this time. “ No, I’m really impressed, intrigued actually. It’s not often that I actually meet a student who’s interested. It ’s just a thought but, if you would like to join, we’re running a program for students to help here: looking after the animals, researching, learning. It would be a nice change to have someone listen when I ask them to do something.” “ I’d love to!” Lucas replied eagerly. “ Well, I’ll give you a number to call to set it up. You’ll probably need to check it with your parents first.” Lucas stared back into the water, his expression unchanged, but somehow artificial, for a moment, before he looked back at her, smiling. “ What the?!” He jumped back in surprise as a huge spray of cold water suddenly swept over him, soaking him. He gasped with the cold and stared worriedly at the tank. A long beak surfaced with a grin plastered below it and then submerged again throwing water out of the tank in a huge wave. “ Mara!” Lori leaned over the tank and stroked the smooth head below the waterline. “ No!” She turned back to Lucas as he slowly followed her over, pushing back his dripping hair. “ I’m sorry about that. I should have warned you about Mara’s initiation. She does that to everyone new. Well, everyone that she likes at any rate.” “ So I should feel honoured?” “ As far as you can when you’re dripping wet and scared out of your wits. This is Mara. She’s a ....” “ A bottlenose? Tursiops truncatus aduncus, Indian Ocean or Australia.” “ Right again. Go to the head of the class but, then again, you probably were already. We’ve also got a spinner and a Pacific white sided dolphin, but this one’s been here the longest: four years, and she’s the most friendly.” “ I read that they actually seek out human company.” “ And it often gets them in trouble; they swim along side boats and get stuck in the nets, that way. She did, that’s where I found her.” She sighed and then smiled again. “She really likes being petted,” she hinted and Lucas smiled, reaching down into the water to stroke the smooth skin. “ It feels strange.” “ I know what you mean. It’s not exactly what you expect.” The dolphin whistled and submerged, swimming in circles. “ She’s the most intelligent. It’s very easy to teach her things or ‘explain’ things when we’re researching, and she’s very trusting, which makes our job a lot easier.” She jumped up. “ I have to go- we both do, unless you want to be locked in here all night!” She led him out through the science labs, pushing him on good naturedly when he was tempted to dawdle. “ I’ll show you all this stuff on Monday, if you can start then. Just give me a call tonight and I’ll be able to tell you if it’s set up and where to meet me.” “ Thanks. I will.” He smiled and walked off with a new energy towards the flat. He had just got in and flopped down, exhausted, in a chair when the vidlink beeped. He groaned and turned it on with the remote. A balding man appeared on the screen looking around the room in confusion. Lucas sat up ad walked over to the screen. “ Can I help?” he asked as politely as he could manage. “ I’m looking for Dr. Wolenczak,” the man explained. “ This is Lucas Wolenczak, can I help?” “ Is your father there?” he persisted. “ No.” “ Can I contact him somewhere else?” “ You won’t get through,” Lucas said unhelpfully. “ I can give him a message, but it’ll probably take a few days to get to him.” “ I’m Dr. Lieneman from the Los Angles Memorial Hospital. I need to talk to the next of kin of Laura Holt.” The name threw him for a moment. “ Laura McKenzie?” Lucas asked fearfully. “ I believe that is her ex-husband’s name,” the doctor replied. “ Is she all right?” He sat down, fear rising tightly in his chest. “ She is physically well, but I’m afraid that she seems to be suffering some sort of breakdown. We do believe that she will be all right, after treatment, but we wanted to inform the next of kin, Dr. Wolenczak, and get permission to treat her,” he explained. “ Can I talk to her?” “ Not at the moment. Perhaps in a few days. You’re her son, I take it?” Lucas nodded still in shock. “ She will be all right. She just needs to be somewhere where she can be helped to work through her problems and rest,” he comforted him gently. “ I would appreciate it if you could get your father to contact me as soon as he can be reached.” Lucas nodded again. Then ‘waking up’ reached for pencil and took down the number and name. “ Er...Thank you,” he mumbled as the screen went dead. He sat for a few moments trying to understand what he had just been told. It didn’t seem to make sense, but then again it made perfect sense. He reached over and typed in the number for his father’s office, turning the lights up to full, suddenly feeling the room dark. A well brushed secretary appeared on the screen. “ I’m afraid you’re father is busy at the moment, Lucas, but I’ll get someone to call you as soon as possible.” She reached over to cut the link “ Wait!” He shouted and she withdrew her hand donning a polite face, clearly expecting to have to put up with ‘a fuss’. “ I need to talk to him now. It’s important.” “ I’m afraid that he’s in a mee....” “ I need to talk to him now! My mother just had a breakdown and her doctor needs to talk to him to get permission to treat her!” He sat down again, as it hit him, hearing himself say it. The blank smile fell of her face and she pressed a few buttons. “ I’ll make sure that he gets your message.” Lucas looked at her shocked. “ I need to...” “ I’m sorry!” She said with force. “ The best I can do is give him the message and the number that he should call.” She meant it and he sighed helplessly and read it off the already crumpled piece of paper. “ I’ll make sure that someone comes over to see you,” she offered and cut the link when Lucas made no motion of having heard her. He sat back and closed his eyes. He didn’t want to know and the thought made him furious. It was exactly what she would think. He sat up on the edge of the seat and stayed there. He didn’t know what to do next: didn’t know what he could do to feel better, to help, but he didn’t want to forget. He owed her more than that and he wouldn’t let her down. So he sat on the edge of the chair until he heard the door open and the current replacement came in. He sat down on the next chair and put a comforting hand on his shoulder. “ I ’m so sorry, Lucas,” he said sincerely. “ I talked to you father and he was calling her doctor as I left. It’ll be OK.” Lucas looked at him for a moment wanting to cry, but he was fed up of crying: fed up of using any shoulder that was there at the time, all pretty much strangers. Besides, he never felt better when he cried, just wet, tired and like a wimp. It didn’t help, so there was no point. But he didn’t know what to do. He couldn’t just sit there forever. “ I need to make a call,” he said slowly. “ Do you want me to leave you alone?” “ No. It’s OK.” He took out Lori’s number and she appeared quickly o the screen. “ Hi. It’s all sorted as long as it’s OK with you and your parents. You can start tomorrow if you like. Just bring a change of clothes. I’ll meet you at the front gate at eight. Is that too early for you?” “ No that’s fine.” “ Great. Well I’ll see you there then.” “ Yeah, thanks very much for sorting it so quickly.” “ Believe me it’s my pleasure.” She smiled and cut the link. Well, at least he had managed to look normal. He turned back into the room and opened his computer, scrolling through the latest site he had found on dolphins. He read late into the night and then fell into bed too tired to stay awake worrying. And he was in a room, huge and vaulted, all in white. He looked down, but there was no ground: nothing. It was like looking into the darkness when there is no light at all and nothing is visible even after the eyes have adjusted. Slowly the darkness spread up the walls, hands reaching out to meet over head and then there was no room, no walls, no ground. But the sound of the wind blowing softly as rustling the leaves of trees overhead, but there was nothing there. He reached out and felt only air and the wind slowly died away, though he had never felt it, only heard it in the trees. And someone walked out of the darkness towards him. She smiled at him, seeming to shrink in stature until there was only a small, golden headed child before him looking at him with wide, innocent eyes. She laughed shrilly and ran off into the darkness and he couldn’t see to follow her. Then around him the air took on the effect of water on the walls of the aquarium, luminous blue ripples, and then one side cleared and there was a window. He walked towards it as a pleasant view rose up. Outside was a patio and then a lawn with carefully pruned hedges and bright flowers neatly tucked into well edged beds. A woman was talking to a man at one side, crying. They looked up, saw him and smiled. He tried the window handle, wanting to go to her, just to sit beside her, filled with longing, but the handle wouldn’t open the window. He shook it to show them that he couldn’t open it and she came towards him. He looked down and saw the key sticking out of the frame on her side. She smiled as she pressed her fingers against the pane and then turned away again. And again he tried the handle and shook the window and she came and stood there smiling at him and left. Then again. The third time she stopped, looking sadly at him, and then all there was in the darkness was the blond child staring at him solemnly as they stood suspended in nowhere. He woke feeling cold, tired and small. He dressed quickly, throwing his stuff into a bag and left, stepping out into the dawn’s pale sunlight and walking along to the aquarium. He sat watching the trees in the park, clasping a cup of coffee he had bought on the way, holding his jacket tightly around him and watching the sun though the trees, still pale enough to look at as it rose red and huge in a mauve sky. For the next few weeks he threw himself into his work at the aquarium, quickly making friends with the staff there. He found himself enjoying his days, busy and fascinated, constantly learning, able to help and be appreciated for it. When term started again he continued to come after school and every weekend. Most of all he loved the easy, comforting companionship of sitting by the dolphin pool, endlessly stroking the shining heads or watching the walls while the dolphins swam in circles. After five weeks he got a call. It was his mother. She looked very wan, but not unhappy when she smiled at him and explained that she was all right. She said that she was taking leave from work to have time to herself to deal with things and that it was going well. She asked him briefly about school and a few other harmless things for five minutes, then she smiled and said goodbye. After that they ‘talked’ like this once a week and Lucas was pleased to see her looking happier and more healthy as time passed, but she never seemed to want to talk about anything more than basic facts, never wanted to talk for more than a few minutes and never said that she wanted to see him. After a few months the calls changed location to her new house and she mentioned that she was working again. He was happy for her, but it seemed like he was happy for a stranger, or a friend of his parents, who he had known briefly when he was young, and it was an aching happiness, bittersweet with a longing for something he couldn’t name. When the school year had nearly ended Lucas went to see Dr. Platt again for a meeting that his father had set up but didn’t manage to attend. The doctor had looked over his school records and he suggested that Lucas might want to go to college in the fall. “Would you like that?” Lucas nodded eagerly. “ Any place in mind?” “ No, but I want to do my degree in A.I.” “ Well, there are several places that are good for that. Stanford for one. It’s not too far to travel and I know some people there... no I don’t mean you’ll get in because I know some people, but it will help in resolving any problems about your age. They’re not too keen on taking people that are so young but I’m sure that they will make an exception when they meet you.” He smiled warmly. “ Of course I’m sure that we can sort it out with any other place you’re interested in. I’m going there for a conference in a week. Do you want to come along and see the place, meet some of the people?” “ If you have the time.” Platt smiled. “ I’ll have the time.” Later that evening after he had graded a pile of the papers for the end of year exams Dr. Platt poured himself a stale cup of coffee and turned on the vidlink. The secretary saw who he was and put him through. “ Bill! You’re lucky you caught me in between meetings,” Lawrence exclaimed, putting down the paper he was reading. “ How can I... oh, the meeting. I’m really sorry about that. I just had this big meeting with the investors and... well, I just couldn’t get away.” “ It’s not me you need to be apologising to. When is the last time you saw Lucas, or talked to him?” He cut straight to the point. Lawrence sighed. “ I tried, really, but I just seem to always have so much work.” He knew that it was more than a feeble excuse. “ Lawrence you know you don’t need to work so hard. You do it, well, who knows why, but you’ve got your priorities wrong over this.” He frowned deeply at his friend. “ I just can’t seem to do it. I did my best...” “ No, you ran away from something that was hard. It’s about time that you had a relationship that is more than a four week fling with the latest adoring follower of your work.” “ The last one lasted five weeks,” his friend replied laughing, then falling silent. “ You won’t keep getting second chances. If you don’t start acting like a semi decent human being you’re going to regret it more and more. For god’s sake act like a grown up for once!” “ Finished the lecture yet?” Lawrence was smiling, trying to regard it lightly, but underneath he was clearly angry. “ You know how I feel. I want Lucas to come with me when I go over to Stanford for a conference next week so I can show him around, see if he likes it there. It’s got a terrific A.I. program and I think I can sort out any problems that his age might cause.” Lawrence nodded. “ If he’s going to be going off to college in the fall, I think you can manage to do a little better in between. After that you can work to your heart/s content,” Platt teased, but with meaning. “ Thanks for your help, Bill. I’ll talk to you and Lucas about the college when you get back. OK? See you in a week or so,” he smiled brightly and cut the link. “ I hope so.” Platt took a deep swallow of coffee, wincing at the taste and pulled another stack of papers towards him. The trip to the college went very well. Lucas took to it immediately and after meeting the teachers they worked out an agreement for him to start that autumn. The conversation with his father didn’t materialise except for five minutes over a hurried signing of the papers, as he left for work one morning. When school ended he spent his time at the aquarium, researching and helping generally. It was the one thing that he would really miss when he was away, but he had found out that, close by the college, there was a similar research centre and he had already contacted them about coming over to study there or help out, when he had free time. The day before he left he went over to the aquarium to say good bye and found that they had thrown a small party for him. He was almost upset by it, as it made him wish that he wasn’t leaving the next day. Afterwards, when he had helped clear up, he went over to the pool and gave Mara a last pet. Lori came up and leaned against the tank beside him. “ I’m going to miss you,” she told him. “ Me too. I wish I wasn’t going,” he said suddenly. “ No you don’t really. You’ll love it once you’re there and we can speak everyday. Besides, you’ll be back in the holidays and maybe I can come up that way for a conference or something.” She grinned and gave him a tight bear hug. “ Just take care of yourself.” “ Thanks.” “ What for?” She asked puzzled. “ That, the party, everything. Just being there.” “ Any time you need me,” she said, staring at him seriously and then giving him another quick hug. “ You’d better go and pack now. I know you won’t have started yet.” He grinned, somewhat sadly, and left. Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999 Date: Tue, 30 Mar 1999 21:25:12 +0100 From: Alexia/Sabrina Subject: Repost: A House of Windows: Part 3a Sender: owner-tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu To: seaquest-ff@quixotic.org, sqfanfic@onelist.com, tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu Reply-to: Alexia/Sabrina X-Mailer: Microsoft Outlook Express 4.72.3110.1 Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999 Jerry had come to see him off instead of the latest replacement, as they had remained friends, which Lucas was grateful for, especially as he hadn’t even said good bye to his father yet. They waited as long as they could for a message and then set off for the airport. The flight and the taxi ride at the end didn’t bother him; rather it was arriving at the gates and waiting, for someone to come and take him to the right place, that unnerved him. But he was glad to be there: glad that there would something interesting to learn, though the school and Platt had done the best they could to keep him interested, but, when he knew more than the teachers, it was pretty much impossible. He was also glad that there now wasn’t the problem of being at home and his father not being there. He was meant to be by himself here and he would at least be busy, maybe make some good friends. A third year student met him and led him across the campus to his dorm building and left him outside the room that he would be sharing with the other students. He opened the door and dragged his bags inside, looking around. A tall youth jumped off a bed on the other side of the room and came over smiling, holding out his hand. “ Mark, nice to meet you. You must be the computer genius we’ve all been hearing about.” Lucas shook his hand, perplexed. “ News travels fast around here,” Mark explained, jumping back up onto the bed. “ The other two aren’t here yet so you have next choice,” he said. “ After that I can show you around a bit, if you like.” “ Sure. Thanks.” Lucas looked out of the window, smiling at the view of the other buildings and the trees below, then he dumped his computer on the bed next to this window and turned back to Mark. “ Ready when you are.” “ Wait up. I think we have a new contestant.” Lucas looked towards the door where a third boy stood grinning nervously at them. Mark crossed over to him and shook hands. “ Mark, Lucas,” he told him briskly. “ Pick a bed and then I’ll give you both the grand tour.” “ Um... Roger. Hi.” He looked around then threw his stuff on a bed. “ OK, let’s go!” “ Do you know who the other person is?” Lucas asked as Mark lead them around, whispering strange facts about the people and rooms that they passed on his ‘tour’. “ Some guy from France apparently. Just hope he can speak English OK. Very good exam results, 150 IQ. Should make for interesting company. No rumours on him, as yet.” Lucas looked at Roger and grinned as Mark started another improbable story about one of the teachers, whose office they had just passed. Later that evening, they all sat around unpacking, chatting and exchanging facts at intervals. The others were all 5 years older than him. Roger, the youngest of the three, was 17, but short. They either didn’t seem to know his age or they didn’t care. Either way he was having more fun than he had had in a while, apart from at the aquarium. He already missed Lori, the dolphins and the water on the walls. The first week went well, the four of them sticking together and so managing not to get too lost. Lucas quickly relaxed into his new surroundings, simply enjoying in the fact that, for the first time in a long time he had actually found some people with whom he could have interesting conversations and discussions. And he even had a few things to learn, he found with pleasurable surprise, in the lectures. In fact the first three weeks were pure fun. In the third week he started to realise that he really wasn’t learning all that much that was new, partly because this was the first year and a lot of the lectures were still getting other people up to scratch on the basics. One of his lecturers saw this and suggested that he go to a lecture by one of the top professors on the research he was conducting on a ‘revolutionary quantum physics theory’. He agreed willingly. It turned out to be a mistake. The lecturer was an arrogant idiot, idiot because Lucas realised within minutes that his theories were wrong. He listened to the lecture, half way through discreetly getting out his computer and taking down the professor’s equations, as they stood so far, uncompleted. After the lecture he hurried back to his room, sitting down and typing without even hearing the greetings of the others as he started to work on the problem. They gathered around, intrigued, for a while, but were soon bewildered when they tried to make sense of what he was doing and eventually they gave up, but remained watching him closely over their essays. At lunch he waved them away when they tried to interrupt, taking mouthfuls of the sandwich they brought him in between his final calculations and manipulations of the formula, so that it proved the theory incorrect. He checked it through quickly and then sat back with a contented sigh. “ So?” Mark threw done his work, impatiently. He hadn’t been able to concentrate, in his curiosity, anyway. “ What’s all the calculations?” Lucas looked at him considering for a moment whether it would piss everyone off to tell them about the theory. Well, if they were going to be friends they shouldn’t mind. “ I went to McCarthy’s lecture today about his research and... his theories are completely wrong.” Roger laughed and turned back to his computer. “ And when you can prove this...” “ I just did.” Roger turned back and looked at him closely for a moment. “ You’re serious!” he said eventually. Lucas nodded. “ I just had to test it and play around with the equation to prove it.” Mark whistled. “ And now?” “ Well, I guess I should tell him. I mean I can tell him how to fix it...” Mark started to laugh. “ Well, it’s better than him spending his time working on something that’s wrong,” Lucas objected. “ That’s not going to be the problem. ‘Carthy’s been working on that theory for 2 years. It’s his pride and joy, not to mention his ‘trip to world fame’ . It ain’t going to look good if some first year kid proves it wrong in one day.” “ I shouldn’t say anything?” Lucas asked, worriedly. “ No. You should. I just want to be there.” Lucas shook his head. “ I think I’ll just write it out and leave it at his office.” “ Whatever you say. I just want to make sure that I don’t miss the look on his face!” Lucas frowned and started to write an explanation of his proof and the solution to the faults in the theory. When he had finished it was late and he posted it through McCarthy’s letter box as they made their way to supper. Lucas was considering falling asleep in their lecture, the next day, on security on the internex, when the door of the hall was flung open and an irate Dr.McCarthy stormed in squinting up at the students in the stalls listening. “ Professor,” the lecturer started to object to the interruption, but McCarthy ignored him. “ I’m looking for a,” he glanced down at a roll of papers in his hand, “Lucas Wolenczak!” “ Oh, sh**!” Mark gasped delightedly beside him. “ Man is he pissed!” Roger grinned on the other side. “ Thanks for the support!” Lucas whispered back. “ Professor McCarthy I’m afraid that we’re in the middle of...” “ I was told that you had a Wolenczak in the lecture. Well?” The lecturer nodded. “ But...” “ I want to speak to this... person at once!” he shouted. “ What is this about, professor?” the lecturer asked patiently, obviously used to McCarthy’s tantrums. “ This Wolenczak has dared to say that... that my theories are incorrect! A first year student! A child! Say my theories are wrong? These are some of the most advanced theories of...” He choked in his anger, turning his famous purple. “ I always wanted to hear if that rumour was true!” Mark commented delightedly. “ I think this can wait until after the lecture...” “ No, it cannot wait. I will not be insulted like this!” The lecturer sighed. “ Lucas, can you come down here for a moment.” Lucas swallowed hard and got up, trying to avoid the furious eyes of the professor, who glared at him with such malice that Lucas wondered if he were a stronger believer in the “ looks could kill” saying. “ Is this yours?” McCarthy thrust the roll of papers towards him. “ Yes,” he assented quietly, looking at the lecturer for rescue. “ What did you write?” the lecturer asked, giving him a wry look that McCarthy luckily didn’t catch. “ I...um... explained that the theory was... wrong and how to fix it,” he answered, nervously. The beleaguered lecturer sighed again. “ I’m afraid that you can’t just go around saying things like that...” “ But I wrote out the proof!” Lucas insisted. The lecturer blinked. “ You wrote out the proof?” he repeated. Lucas nodded. “ As in calculations? formulae?” Another nod. The lecturer moved round his desk frowning in thought. “ OK, class, change of subject. Let’s have a look at this proof since Professor McCarthy has decided to interrupt our lesson to discuss it.” He motioned a chair to the professor who sat, still fuming. “ OK, let’s see it,” he said, moving aside for Lucas to use the keyboard attached to the wall monitor. Lucas walked around nervously, looking down at the keys and then up into the balcony. His friends gave him the thumbs up sign. After all, he had been nice enough to show him what he was doing wrong so that he wouldn’t waste his time and how to do it right. And he was fed up of people not believing anything he said because they thought he was too young to understand. He pulled up the relevant file from his computer and scrolled through the proofs on the equations, pausing to prove his steps with calculations when necessary, he explained the manipulations, simplifications and equivalencies until he had the final equation/ proof neatly laid out at the bottom. The he looked across at the lecturer and McCarthy. Both were staring fixedly at the screen. The lecturer smiled. “ Well, professor, I’m afraid that I can’t argue with that proof. I’m sorry that you’re theory didn’t work out to be correct. It’s just a pity we don’t have time to continue onto the solutions that Lucas mentioned.” McCarthy looked at him, horror and complete mortification written across his face, then stalked out. The lecturer turned back to Lucas. “ Boy, did I enjoy that. I think we’d better go and talk to the head of the department, though. Don’t worry, he had that coming and you were completely right, but there’s going to be a huge fuss over this.” Lucas nodded glumly. “ Cheer up! It’s not everyday that you prove one of the top minds in his field wrong in his most important theory.” He shook his head. “ I just can’t believe that you did it!” “ Because I’m young,” Lucas asked, offended and annoyed. “ Yes,” he replied honestly. “ And because no else could. I think we’re going to have to have a little talk about what you should be studying, as well. This stuff is probably sending you to sleep.” Lucas grinned wryly and followed the lecturer out, still shaking his head in astonishment. “ That was amazing. Absolutely... did you have help on this?” Lucas shook his head. “ No. I just saw it when I was in the lecture yesterday.” “ Yesterday!” “ Uhuh,” he replied, staring straight ahead, as they walked. “ Oh, boy!” The lecturer stopped and knocked loudly at the department’s head door before entering. McCarthy turned from the head’s desk and stormed out of the room. Lucas winced as the door slammed. “ Sit down, please. I would like to say that it’s nice to see you again Lucas, but... well, professor McCarthy is rather upset...” “ More like dented ego,” Lucas argued defensively and the lecturer laughed. The head frowned at them, secretly in complete agreement. “ Maybe, but he just quit. Not that the students will miss him, or the staff, but it isn’t exactly easy to lose a key member of staff at the start of a term.” He sighed and tuned to the lecturer. “ The proof was conclusive?” “ Absolutely.” The head nodded reluctantly. “ He’ll lose funding as well as face and he isn ’t going to be best pleased about that, but at least I won’t have to deal with it anymore.” He turned back to Lucas. “ I’m afraid that I can’t have staff quitting like this every day of the week. Now, I’m not saying that you shouldn’t use your abilities or that you should not say anything. Just warn us first if you’re going to tear apart another major theory?” Lucas looked at him worriedly, but th head’s eyes were smiling. “ I think we’d better reconsider your placement, in terms of your work. I’ve already had several of the staff talk to me about it and I think this just decides the issue. You’d better move up into the second year After that we’ll see. I don’t think that I can move things any faster than that. You’ll have to do the three years, but I’m sure we can sort something else out if you’re very bored.” This time he was smiling openly. “ Can I stay in my dorm?” Lucas asked worriedly. “ That shouldn’t be a problem. I have to make some calls to see if I can find a replacement for McCarthy but after that I’ll talk to the tutors and we’ll have you in second year classes by tomorrow.” “ Well, that was a big surprise!” Mark said, lying back on his bed. “ They letting you stay here?” he asked concerned. “ Yeah.” “ And I thought something good might come of it!” Roger joked and Lucas threw a pillow at him, then he grew serious. “ Hey, you’re practically falling asleep in lectures. In the second year you might be able to stay semi- conscious.” “ It’s not that.” “ Then what?” Lucas looked up at him doubtfully. “ I just don’t want to piss people off.” “ By being smart?” Lucas shrugged. “ Hey, if it pisses them off, then they don’t really count do they? I mean you’re not really interested in what complete idiots think are you?” Mark smiled reassuringly at him. Lucas smiled back. “ Thanks.” Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999 Date: Wed, 31 Mar 1999 15:10:48 +0100 From: Alexia/Sabrina Subject: Repost: A House of Windows: Part 4 Sender: owner-tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu To: seaquest-ff@quixotic.org, sqfanfic@onelist.com, tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu Reply-to: Alexia/Sabrina X-Mailer: Microsoft Outlook Express 4.72.3110.1 Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999 Part 4 The second year did prove to be much more interesting, though still not a real stretch, by any means, and he often found himself knowing much more than the teachers. Still, it meant that he didn’t have to work too hard and that he had plenty of time to chat with the others. Too much time, he discovered, as their work load increased and he found himself the only one with free time. That was when he really started to miss the aquarium, and the next free day he took the bus over to the one near by. He wandered around for a while, getting the feel of the place and to know his way about. After that he went back to reception and asked to speak to the researcher that Lori had called for him. She appeared a few moments later and took him though to the labs where she was finishing an experiment. He helped her clear up afterwards and then they wandered down to the pool for her to introduce him to their more important research subjects. They chatted, while Lucas gently petted the bottlenose dolphin that had stayed near them in some interest after the others had swum off to play again. The researcher was clearly impressed and asked if he would have time to help with the research and that computer stuff that he had suggested. He agreed eagerly that he would start the next day. The term passed quickly and then it was the holidays. A car met him at the airport and he went straight to the aquarium to see all the people, animals and Lori in person, though they had been talking several times a week while he’d been away. Then he went home and waited. After a while he tried his father’s office and asked if he had any plans that he wanted him to be around for. The answer was no, so the next day and most other days he spent his time with Lori and the other researchers. Some of the time it was research: sometimes they discussed new theories or had a tutorial on something new, other times helping with the animals, tours and other students. It was in the Christmas holidays of his third year that he started to feel lonely again. At college or at the aquarium there were people around, things to do and learn, people who cared about him and who he cared about, that weren’t paid to do so and that had him around by choice. But there was only one term left and after that he wasn’t sure what would happen. He supposed he could do a postgraduate degree but when he discussed this with his tutors they simply told him that there was no need for him to study any longer. He supposed that he could teach or research, but he wasn’t sure about the legalities of getting his own place, to be wherever that required. He liked the security of the college: having his friends around all the time. In the holidays half the time he had even taken to sleeping at the aquarium to avoid the emptiness of the apartment. It no longer seemed ‘light and airy’ but empty and unlived in. He didn’t know what he would do once his three years ended. He couldn’t just stay on, but he couldn’t bear the thought of leaving. Apart from back to the flat, there was still nowhere else to go. It was during that holiday that he started to get angry. His father had promised that he was going to come home for at least a week and consequently had told the ‘replacements’ that they wouldn’t be needed. Lucas waited for two days for him to arrive, staying at the flat rather than going to the aquarium, but his father didn’t come. He called the office and was told by a temporary secretary that Dr. Wolenczak was busy and couldn’t be disturbed. Finally she admitted that he wasn’t even there, so she couldn’t get any messages to him, except emergency or business ones. And there was no apology, no mention of it. He was simply alone there. Luckily he was able to put meals and other necessary expenses on their accounts, because there was no one else at the office that he knew, or at least could contact, and he was fed up with having to ask everyone he knew for help. In a way it felt good to be angry because at least it meant that he wasn’t completely blaming himself; he had accepted that this wasn’t his fault. He wasn’t ready to give up on his father, but he wasn’t going to keep waiting patiently for him to decide that he wanted a relationship. If he did, he would have to do more than simply turn up, this time. It was the middle of the week and he was exhausted. He had just finished a major programming project and had been working 18 hour days to get it finished. His room mates were still working, but he was too tired to wait for them to finish, so he rolled over and buried his head in his pillow to block out the light. And he was back in the darkness. He waited. After a while there was a bright spark of flame and a hiss as a match was struck and took light. The match was moved by a pair of pinched fingers to a candle wick and a face appeared, above this, out of the darkness. His father smiled briefly at him and then the match went out. A spurt of flame and it caught and died. And again, again, again for a long time. Then it grew light and the black nothing became a grey nothing. Off to the left, his father was walking away, closing a door. Lucas ran across the nothing, but the door has disappeared into the grey. Then there was another and his father closed it and it disappeared, and another and he continued chasing the doors until he stopped panting for breath. Then there was a window that looked out to nothing. His father walked by on the other side, pausing to look through at him and then he continued on. And nothing. Eventually four steps appeared out of the grey and he followed them up only to find another four and another. He didn’t know how long he climbed but after a while he sat down and refused to go any further and the steps disappeared and it grew dark again. Slowly the darkness was replaced by water, rippling blue all around him and he settled down onto the greyness and watched it at peace until he drifted off into sleep and then it was morning. The whole of the next day he walked around, still not awake, feeling as if he’d been running a marathon all night, instead of sleeping long and deeply. That night he fell into bed early again. There was no blackness or grey this time, but only the water for a long time and then his parents passed through it and he tried to talk to them, each in turn, and they simply smiled at him, not seeming to hear and indeed he couldn’t even hear his own words, though he knew he was shouting as loudly as he could. Eventually they left, but he couldn’t follow them. They just simply weren’t there anymore and he was alone in the water. After a while the water started to grow brighter and brighter, and finally there were dolphins swimming all around him, whistling and clicking. He called to them and they came closer and answered, but he couldn’t understand, though he was filled for a longing to know their words, that he was missing something infinitely important. Then the light died and everything was gone and he wasn’t aware that he dreamed anymore, though he remembered it all clearly when he woke early, before dawn, and sat looking out of the window, through the trees, at the sunrise. He had no classes that day so he wandered over to the aquarium to look over the finished research. It was still too early for any of the others to have arrived, apart from the cleaning and maintenance staff, so he flicked idly though the papers and then went to the pool. The dolphin swam round by him, chirping and whistling greetings he couldn’t understand. He desperately wanted to, though, to hear another voice, one that he could comprehend. It seemed like he was better with dolphins than people. He sighed and then threw being sensible to the winds and let himself down into the cold water and swam quickly for warmth, diving and playing. After a long time he felt cold and so he pulled himself out, his clothes heavy and dripping, and sat again on the side in the sunshine that was now strong and hot, letting his clothes dry in it’s warmth. He had been thinking about a strange idea that had followed his dream last night and which he had been contemplating all morning. He got up, wandered back into the labs, booted up a computer and started writing, planning the program. When the others arrived, they didn’t disturb him seeing him intent on his work. Eventually he looked up from the finished hypothesis. “ Is anyone working with Poseidon and Leto?” he asked, briskly. The room muttered a general negative. “ What were you working on?” Rosalind questioned curiously, bending over and frowning at the notes on the computer. “ I need to make a recording of the dolphins after I ask them to do something,” he explained. “ Well, I’m not doing anything at the moment since the other project is finished. Want some help?” she offered. “ Sure, great. You can check that I’m not too rusty on the training signals. Will you get the equipment set up to record, while I go and see if I can get them ready?” “ See you there.” She smiled, still curious and left to gather the amplifier and boom so that they could pick up the sounds. When she got up to the open tank, Lucas was sitting at one end petting Leto, while Poseidon swam lazily close by. She plugged in the cord, brought the boom over and together they connected it to the laptop ( that Lucas had brought ) so they could see the sound waves. “ OK, that looks good,” Rosalind said, squinting at the frequencies and the amplitude variations as they tested the system. “ Shall I start it rolling?” “ Yes, but I’ll want you to put a marker on it when I’ve explained what I want them to do. I want to see what they say. OK, can you get Poseidon over there? I’m just going to get Leto to do the first step of their act, but I want to see how she tells him what it is that they have to do.” Rosalind nodded, uncertainly and went to get some fish to coax Poseidon to another side of the pool. “ OK. We’re going to do something nice and easy. OK. Hoop Ball Fetch! Got it? Hoop Ball Fetch,” he commanded, gesturing with the required actions and then passing her the ball when she nodded into the water. “ Good girl,” he told her, giving her a last pet before she swam off. Then he gestured to Rosalind to stand back to let them proceed and went to watch the oscilloscope, putting a marker on the tape. Soon the screen rippled as Leto started clicking and whistling and then the two, pushing the ball between them, swam over to the hoop at the other side of the pool. “ So?” Rosalind asked, impatiently. “ They do that everyday- well only slightly different. What’s the big deal about it?” “ I needed to record what she said to explain it to him,” Lucas told her, watching the screen and then stopping the tape. “ Give them a reward each, for me will you, and then see if Leto will come in to the lab pool?” he asked absently, occupied with the data of the recording. He left before she had time to answer and set up the recording on his laptop, by the pool, and attached an amplifier and speaker to it, waiting for Leto to arrive. Eventually she swam in and surfaced, blowing spray at him. “ OK, here goes nothing. If this doesn’t work that whole thing is useless, you know, so you better help me with this.” He sighed, trying to relax. Well, if it doesn’t work it’s not such a big deal. It’s not like you’ve spent loads of time on it. He picked up the ball, that he had brought back with him, and showed it to her, letting her see it and push it around a little. “ Ball,” he told her and then turned back to the laptop. “ OK, let’s try this one,” he muttered to himself selecting a click/ whistle set from the recording and letting it play over the speakers. “ Ball,” he repeated, pushing it back and forth in the water with her and replaying the section of tape. The dolphin looked at him curiously. “ OK... let’s try this one.” And he selected another section of the tape. “ Ball?” he asked and replayed it. The dolphin submerged impatiently and Rosalind crouched beside him. “ Will you set up another recorder for me?” he asked, without turning, scrolling through the tape as she got up and then returned with the equipment. “ Anything else, Sir?” she teased, grinning at his frustration. “ What... Oh, Thanks. Just turn it on will you.” He turned back to Leto handing her a fish. “ Ball,” he told her tiredly, pushing it over to her and trying another section of the recording. The dolphin clicked at him and patted the water. “Ball,” he repeated eagerly, playing back the same section. The dolphin nosed it over to him, whistling. “ You aren’t trying to do what I think.... You’re nuts!” Rosalind exclaimed, crossing over to him. He jumped up quickly and crossed to the second computer, stopping the tape and playing the last section back, his face changing from tense to delighted. He ignored her teasing and quickly positioned the two machines next to each other and compared the shape and frequency of the waves. He shook his head, his face growing blank and highlighted the section on the first machine to transfer, it between the laptops, where he placed it over the section on the second machine and tried a match. 96% match. He stood up and turned to the confused student next to him. “ It worked. It really worked!” he told her with no expression in his tone. “ What worked. Lucas, you lost me when I came in here- well, you never explained what you were doing. What are you doing?” she asked exasperated. “ I think we just established the concept of a word. This,” he said pointing to the screen, “ Is her word for ball... I think,” he added still doubtful. “ That’s her word for a ball?” Rosalind asked, smirking cynically. “OK. Let’s try it out.” He reached over for the hoop and tossed it into the pool. “ Hoop,” he told the dolphin and tried a section of the tape, watching the second screen. There was a long pause and then the dolphin clicked loudly and submerged for a moment, tossing the water about the pool. They both bent over the new data and Lucas scrolled through the original recording. “ There!” he cried, pointing and running a match. 95% match, the machine flashed at him. he played back the recording over the speaker, waving the hoop at the excited dolphin. “ Hoop.” The dolphin clicked the same sound as before and patted the water. “ I do not believe that you just... It’s impossible! It’s just a... Try it with something else. Try fish.,” she ordered, throwing one at him. “ Fish.” The screen rippled. “ Play it back,” he called. “ Fish,” he reiterated in time with the play-back and the dolphin patted the water as he dropped the fish into her open mouth and then ran around to the computer. “ OK, mark those. OK that’s Ball and that’s hoop, and fish. OK, if that’s ball and hoop then the other section must be the verb,” he deduced, looking at the original recording. What do you think?” he turned to Rosalind. “ You’re f***ing insane, but it works! How on earth did you think... never mind. Try something else quick!” They spent the next few hours trying to put words to basic objects that Leto was familiar with, glad that there were only a few people there as it was ‘tour season’ so that there were only a few other researchers. After that, Leto got bored and swam off to let them look over the data. Over the following weeks they continued to gather noun translations and then some basic verbs and names for the people and dolphins. They rigged a large screen in one corner so that they could show visual images to try to translate the verbs that proved to be difficult and certain basic ideas like ‘open’ and ‘closed’. For this they had to demonstrate the idea in various ways, trying to relate them to the world that the dolphins were familiar with. It took a long time to establish even a very basic set of words, but after that they progressed much faster as they were able to explain things in words that the dolphins could understand knowing that dolphins always comprehend faster when the information/ ideas are communicated aurally as opposed to visually. For the next few months he put all his energy and anger into the project and it grew, developing rapidly and successfully. It was company when he felt alone and a distraction from home. It was something that was all his and was wonderful. It also showed him that he had a lot to offer, and gave him confidence in himself and his abilities. It was a proof of all the talents that he had simply played with before, occasionally showing them in brilliant flashes, like in the courtroom or in the lecture hall. But this was not just a one-off event. This was something that was going to change the way people looked at things from now on. Somehow the accomplishment of this gave him the right to be angry, because it told him that he was worth something, that he could expect more, that he had that right. It was the end of the year and he was graduating ahead of his friends. It should have been a great day- after all, he was the youngest graduate ever from that program, and with a Magna cum Laude, but it meant that he would be leaving; he felt that he was leaving them, when the last thing he would ever do willingly was leave love and friendship behind when he found them. It would have been OK if he had felt that he wasn’t leaving the only people who really cared about him, but he couldn’t feel otherwise. Lori and his friends from the Stanford Aquarium had all come to be there and discuss the project, which was nearing completion, but he couldn’t appreciate it. He had never believed that his father wouldn’t come to this. In fact, the one thing in which he seemed to have kept an interest was his son’s education and progress. During the ceremony he felt a deep ache- not the type of pain that forces you into loud sobs and long tears, but the type of ache that just stays and won’t let you forget about it, where there’s nothing you can do, to make it go away, but wait. He managed to do what was required, getting up at the right time, smiling, shaking hands, making appropriate comments, but at the end he finally got away from his friends to have a minute alone, looking out across the lawns, away from the crowded white pavilion, where people were already having to shout to each other to be heard over the chatter, as they sipped champagne, in real flutes, that were laid out on linen clothed tables in one corner. “ Lucas?” He turned around, recognising the voice, but not being able to place it. “ Dr. Platt!” he gasped, astonished. “ It’s nice too see you too,” he smiled affectionately. “ It seems I was right, then, about making them take ‘some precocious 12 year old.” His face grew serious. “ Have you been happy here?” Lucas nodded fervently. “ Very. Thank you, really, thank you,” he stressed with deep gratitude. “ I really appreciate... everything that you’ve done for me.” “ I think you did that for yourself. Congratulations are in order, I think.” He passed Lucas a glass of champagne, that he had picked up from a table in the pavillion, and toasted. “ To Stanford’s youngest and best student so far. They’ll be sorry to lose you here. It seems that the quality of teaching has improved tremendously, though not necessarily due to the staff.” He grinned. “ Have you thought about what you want to do next?” he asked carefully. Lucas shook his head. “ I don’t know. I just don’t know what I can do. There doesn’t really seem anywhere else for me to be right now,” he said distantly and then more lightly, “ Maybe something will come up after I finish my program.” “ I heard about that, well just that you were working on something brilliant, as usual. So what exactly is the research on...” Later that day Lucas drove with him to the airport to see him off, waving goodbye as he checked through security, smiling cheerfully, but Platt seriously doubted any sincerity behind that. He was furiously angry with Lawrence, on his own account and on Lucas’. More than that, he was sad that his friend couldn’t manage to be there for his son, and he knew that it would mean that Lawrence would be very much alone when he was older and he would regret it, but not be able to change it. What seemed even more incredible was that Lucas should put up with so much, but he supposed that the boy was used to much worse treatment than neglect. It was such a waste, though. He was so talented and so willing to give love with only the slightest encouragement, yet Lawrence seemed unable to bring himself to be there to accept it. He sighed sadly. There was nothing more he could do and he hated to just have to watch this happen, but he wasn’t the one who could change things. Lucas stayed on for another few weeks to sort out his things and say good bye to his friends. After that he flew back with Lori, who had stayed to see how the program was developing as well as the other projects he had helped with at the aquarium. When he got back to the flat Jerry got up from the couch to greet him. “ Congratulations,” he said, shaking his hand. “ Thanks. I wasn’t expecting there to be anyone here,” Lucas replied, pleasurable surprised. Jerry shifted uneasily at this. “ But it’s really nice to see you,” Lucas continued, smoothing over the awkward gap. “ How’s the project going?” he asked trying to make small talk. “ Great. The investors are pleased, the UEO is pleased and we’re even on schedule!” Jerry warmed to the topic gladly. Clearly he was loving his new post, helping with the management of the project’s development and Lucas was glad for him. “ Tell you what. Let’s go somewhere for dinner and I’ll tell you what I can- classified and all that,” Jerry laughed conspiratorially. Besides, I think we need to celebrate!” “ So,” Jerry sat back from the table, “ What are you going to do now that you’re a college graduate?” Lucas’ face dropped at this. “ I don’t know,” he said honestly. “ I don’t know what I can do. I’m just working on finishing this program at the moment and after that...” He shrugged and then came to a decision. “ I’m sorry to ask you this, but could you try and get my father to call me some time. I’m at the aquarium most of the day: that’s the number. I need to talk to him about this. I mean... I don’t have a clue what I’m going to be doing with my life after the next month or so. I don’t suppose he was planing to be around more to help me with that, so I want to have a chance to figure out what my options are.” “ Sure,” Jerry agreed uncomfortably. “ Look, Lucas I’m really sorry about...” he left the sentence unfinished, too uncomfortable with the whole topic to say what he meant out loud. “ It’s not your fault. But at least I know it’s not mine either.” “ Of course it’s not your fault that your father is a ...” Jerry burst out, cutting himself off embarrassed. “ Sorry. That didn’t come out so well.” Lucas smiled grimly. “ Right now I’m not particularly bothered about what anyone calls him.” Dr. Wolenczak looked up in annoyance at the interruption of a knock at his door. “ Come in!” he shouted, impatiently. He would have to talk to his secretary again. “ Jerry! Sit down. Sorry, I thought it was one of those idiot accountants come to check estimates for the fiftieth time. Is everything OK with the new area?” he asked worried. “ Everything’s fine with the project. I didn’t come about that. Lucas asked me to get you to call him. He wants to know what he’s going to be doing now that college has finished,” he said tightly. “ Tell him I’ll call as soon as I have a moment. Maybe you could talk to Bill, ask him to check out any postgrad courses, or whatever he’s interested in. I don’t know. Bill mentioned that he had a ‘big programming project’ on, maybe he wants to do something in that line. Can you find out what it is and I’ll see who I can talk to about it? Thanks.” He bent back, dismissively, over his work. “ Dr. Wolenczak, I don’t mean to sound... to step over the line, but I really think that... well, that you should be doing that rather than getting other people to! He’s your son and you can’t just delegate him to us like he ’s some smaller project. You can’t pay for someone else to look after him, not to give him love; none of them are around for long enough to even get to know him. It doesn’t work like that. Sure, I or, who ever it is at the time, can make certain he has everything he needs, organise things, but I can’t be his father; I can’t give him that type of security or love. You can’t get that from people who are paid to be there. Besides, he doesn’t want or need that from us. You’re his father, and you’re the only one who can do that!” He finished and then swallowed nervously, realising that he probably had said too much in his anger. Dr. Wolenczak looked at his furious assistant for a long time. “ I’ll take the weekend off and we can discuss what he wants to do after the summer,” he said slowly. “ You satisfied with those terms?” Jerry nodded, unsure whether his boss was taking this good humouredly or whether he was about to be fired. “ Good. Book a table at... At that restaurant I like, the one with the fountain in the middle. Saturday, at eight.” “ Yes, Sir.” Jerry closed the door behind him and then let out the breath he ’d been holding, smiling as he went back to his office to make the call. The screen opened on one of the aquarium labs. “ Is Lucas Wolenczak there?” Jerry asked the woman who had answered. She nodded. “ Lucas!” she called and left as he came over. “ Hi. I talked to your father. He said that he was taking the weekend off for you to talk,” Jerry told him happily, pleased by the broad smile he received back. It was three o’clock on Sunday night. He hadn’t slept and he wasn’t planning to. He knew that he should, that he should call someone or do something, like get a drink of coffee or something to eat, but he wasn’t interested in being sensible or looking after himself. His father hadn’t shown up. He was angry and he was enjoying it, the sense of exhilaration and power, the feeling of emotional strength. But thinking wasn’t enough, it was too abstract, too passive. He wanted to do something to show it, to relieve it before he exploded. Anyway, what did it matter? He might regret it in the morning- it was the morning- later, but right now it was what he wanted. It was about time that his father realised that he wasn’t just some child, that he had things to offer to the world. He knew that his father regarded his talents as something to think that he owned, but not as anything that could serve a useful purpose, more in the abstract, as a source of pride to boast of to company. He watched as the screen flickered into light, coating the surfaces of the dark room with it’s glow. He typed for a while and then sat back as the company logo came up. Then he started working. The layers peeled back faster than ever before, the codes were resolved and he worked his way further and further into the system. Finally he sat back. So where did he want to go? What did he want to do here? The whole of the company’s records and files were open to him from here and he had blocked their security measures that they wouldn’t even know that he was there. He could do what he wanted and there would be no consequences. This thought didn’t exhilarate him though, as it might of. It scared him, but he was too angry to just turn it off and forget about it. He scrolled through the directories and picked the one that was his father’s project. At least I’ll know what it is he’s spending all his time on, I’ll know just how feeble an excuse it really is. He read through the files all night and then into the morning. It was a tremendous project, but it wasn’t an excuse. Other people still found time to go home, at least more than once every month for five minutes. Then he shut off the computer, flicking off the power quickly, scared by what he had been thinking. But he hadn’t forgotten to save his way in, first. He got up and walked around uncomfortably for a while and then locked the flat and left. He walked quickly through the silent streets, in the darkness, as it was cold so early in the morning and he hadn’t waited to bring a jacket. When he got there, he let himself into the labs and sat down to work on the program. It was nearly finished. The only problem was he couldn’t be sure that it would work until he had done it. Lori brought him coffee and meals throughout the day, as he refused to interrupt his work for anything. He stayed after they had left, curling up on the small, uncomfortable couch in the ‘rest’ area, for the technicians, when he was too tired to think anymore and slept instantly. Eight hours later he was back at the computer with a cup of stale coffee to start putting the pieces together, now that he had finished the random sampling part that had been the hardest and longest to complete. He had started working on it even before the idea for its further use, in this project, had occurred to him and it had taken him sixth months hard work to complete. He knew that there were still some code lines that weren’t completely accurate, but it was still a brilliant piece of work. He worked and slept in the labs for three weeks. Lori tried making him take a break, worried, but he only returned more edgy and tired looking the next day, so she gave up the attempt. He finished putting together the last details of the program late on a Friday night. Lori had stayed to see the end of it all and there it was, finished. Lucas stared at his screen and the finished program, slowly moving through it, as they checked it for anything that he had missed. At last he sighed and looked up at Lori, as she straightened up from reading over his shoulder. She turned back to him and smiled tiredly. Lucas looked back at the screen and then slowly turned it off. “ Let’s wait until tomorrow,” he said, scared that he would try it only to find that it didn’t work. If that was going to happen, he wanted it to be when he wasn’t quite so tired and when he had a full day ahead of him to try to fix any faults. Lori nodded, approvingly. “ I’ll be here early, then we can start.” Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999 Date: Thu, 01 Apr 1999 21:23:18 +0100 From: Alexia/Sabrina Subject: Repost: A House of Windows: Part 4b Sender: owner-tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu To: seaquest-ff@quixotic.org, sqfanfic@onelist.com, tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu Reply-to: Alexia/Sabrina X-Mailer: Microsoft Outlook Express 4.72.3110.1 Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999 She was there before he was awake the next morning, so that his first awareness was the smell of proper, fresh coffee. He staggered into the next room and they ate breakfast together, silently, excited and nervous, not quite wanting to take the last step. Lori set down her cup as she finished her coffee and looked across at Lucas. “ Ready?” He pulled a face but got up and followed her out, into the lab, sitting down and booting up the laptop that they had moved to be next to the pool. The program went though its preliminary checks and was ready. Lucas reached over and turned on the vocorder, which lighted up co-operatively. “ What do I say?” he whispered to Lori. “ I don’t know,” she whispered back, laughing. “ Whatever you want.” “ You want to....” “ No way!” she refused. “ Mara?” Lucas asked, speaking nervously into the vocorder. It whistled and chirped for a moment. “ That sounded... OK,” Lori offered and they watched the tank eagerly. Mara surfaced with a spray threw his blow hole and Lucas had to hold his hand over the device to stop it getting waterlogged. He cleared his throat. And Lori nodded at him impatiently. Mara chirped at as he raised the vocorder again. “ Hello.” Lucas jumped as the voice came across the speakers, sat frozen for a moment and then looked across at Lori with shining eyes. “ Good morning, Mara,” he tried more confidently. “ Want play?” the speakers asked and they both burst out laughing with joy and relief. “ It works!” Lucas shouted hugging Lori tightly. “ I can’t believe it!” She replied, her face alight. “ Ask her something else, quickly! Ask her where I found her.” “ Where did you met Lori, Mara?” “ In net. Men have net. Caught. Lori open net. Bring pool.” “ Oh, my God! It really works.” Lucas was staring at her blankly. “ Wake up! It works! I just can’t... this is going to change everything... I can’t believe it. Yesterday there were a million things I would have asked in a second, but I can’t think of one of them now!” Lucas handed her the vocorder. “ Well, it works. Make a list and start when you want!” He got up and left her chatting to Mara, listening delightedly, while he watched the program translating. The other staff arrived gradually, some running over, not believing what they saw, some just stopping in the door way, amazed. The first problems that emerged were with adjectives and the lack of abstract nouns, for which they first needed to have an established vocabulary to work from. Apart from a few minor faults, which he quickly corrected, they spent the day in cross examination and celebration. They decided that they wouldn’t announce the success immediately as they wanted to have more time to learn the system themselves first and see what other problems came up over time. Some one went out and brought back a bottle of champagne and they closed the centre for the day to celebrate and learn. No one left until after eleven that night. Lucas and Lori were the last to leave, locking up behind them. “ So what are you going to do now?” she asked. “ I haven’t thought about it.” “ Just make sure that you take a break now and celebrate!” she ordered as she ran off happily to her car. Lucas walked slowly down path and onto the street, not really thinking about where he was going. After a while he stopped and looked around him at the street names, realising where he’d been subconsciously heading. For a moment he debated whether to continue, but he felt emboldened by his success and shrugged away his doubts, quickening his steps. He ran up the white front steps of the company building, lightly, two at a time and in through the polished glass doors, that were never shut, as the researchers, managers and personal came and went at all hours, working through the night. He went over to the reception desk. The man sitting behind it looked down at him sceptically. “ I need to see Dr Wolenczak,” Lucas told him. “ Name?” “ Lucas Wolenczak. I’m his son,” he explained, not minding, in his happiness, the man’s tone of contempt. The man frowned slightly and then turned on the intercom, turning away so that Lucas couldn’t hear him. Eventually he turned back. “ I’m very sorry, but Dr. Wolenczak is in a very important meeting and he cannot be disturbed.” “ I need to see him. He won’t mind.” Lucas told him confidently. Not for this! “ It’s very important. Tell him that the program worked,” he added quickly. The man sighed and relayed the message. “ I’m sorry. Dr Wolenczak does not want to be disturbed,” he repeated. “ Ask him, not his secretary. He’ll want to talk to me, really.” The man looked up at the ceiling and talked into his head set. He turned back, exasperated. “ I’m sorry but...” “ You don’t understand. I need to talk to him now and he really, really won’ t mind my interrupting!” The man took off his headset and looked down over the desk at him. “ Look, I ’m sorry but I can’t let you through. Would you like me to call you a cab?” he offered, relenting somewhat. Lucas shook his head dumbly and then had an idea. “ Can you see if Jerry Goode is there?” The man put back on the headset and conversed with someone at the other end. “ You said it was important?” Lucas nodded and the man said a few more words. “ He’ll be down in a moment. If you’ll just wait over there,” he pointed to a row of seats. Lucas crossed over, but was too excited to sit. He waited impatiently, flicking through the magazines on the table. “ Lucas, is everything all right?” Jerry asked, hurrying over. “ Fine. Great!” Lucas replied, putting down the magazine he was holding and turning back to his friend looking happier than he had ever seen him. “ The program worked!” Jerry looked at him blankly for a moment and then a look of amazement spread across his face. “ The dolphin one?” Lucas nodded. “ The one... talking...” “ It works!” he repeated. “ You talked to them.” “ Yes. About, well, everything we could think of. We’re still having problems with ideas and some descriptive words but it works.” “ You’re serious,” Jerry said, stating it rhetorically. “ That’s terrific. I mean, I can’t believe it but... Can I come and see?” “ Of course. As soon as you can. We’re starting again early on Monday. We haven’t told anyone yet, though, because we still have to test it some more, learn about it ourselves,” Lucas said laughing and then he stopped. “ I want to tell my father, but I can’t get through...” “ No problem.” Jerry smiled at him and led him to the lifts and up to the conference room. He told Lucas to wait outside while he fetched his father. He came out looking furious. “ Lucas, I don’t have...” “ My program worked!” Lucas interrupted him. Dr. Wolenczak sighed and looked tiredly at his beaming son. “ What program?” You didn’t read my notes, my reports? You don’t remember? “ The one I’ve been working on the dolphin communications one... well, it works. We tried it this...” “ Lucas, I know this is important to you, but I just don’t have time for it right now. This is a very important meeting and I can’t interrupt it for some college project. I’m sorry, but it will have to wait until later. I’ll call you at home,” he said exasperated. Lucas’ face went white but his father didn’t see, as he had already gone back into the meeting. He stood quite still for a moment and then walked away down the corridor leaving Jerry standing staring after him, not knowing what to do. Copyright E.CAsale, 1997, 1998, 1999 Date: Fri, 02 Apr 1999 14:38:23 +0100 From: Alexia/Sabrina Subject: Repost: A House of Windows: Part 5a Sender: owner-tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu To: seaquest-ff@quixotic.org, sqfanfic@onelist.com, tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu Reply-to: Alexia/Sabrina X-Mailer: Microsoft Outlook Express 4.72.3110.1 Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999 Part 5 He didn’t think as he stood in the elevator or as he walked across the polished floor of the hall and out into the night. A taxi pulled over and he got in, sitting back, still unable to think, as they cruised though the lighted streets. “ We’re here!” the driver called, for what must have been the third time, by the sound of his voice. Lucas handed him a crumpled note and got out, leaving the man with the change, not even thinking about it. The apartment was very dark when he got in, but he didn’t turn on the lights, standing in the darkness, until his eyes adjusted to the gloom. He sat down and pulled his computer towards him and let it boot up. Then he looked through his files for the link into his father’s company. He really didn’t care what happened this time. He was too tired from the work, the excitement of the day and the past few weeks, and he was way too angry to ignore it. He typed for a while and then sat back satisfied. He’d blocked all access to the files from within the company for the next ten hours- none of the vital ones, but it would cause havoc in any case. Well, now he’s got a valid reason to be at work instead of here! Then he lay back on the couch and cried silently for a while. After that he fell asleep. He hadn’t wanted to. He wanted to stay awake until he dropped from exhaustion because he simply didn’t care, but sleep came and it was peaceful, no dreams, but no thoughts or worries or pain either. When he awoke, he wandered around the city for a while, ignoring his thoughts and concentrating on the city as it slowly came to life, groaning for the start of the new week. After that he curled up on a bench in the park and slept again, for a few hours. When he woke he was cold and stiff. The day was turning out to be overcast so that, without the sun to warm it, the ocean breeze cooled the air. He looked at his watch. Ten a.m. They should be pretty much freaking out by now. Then he had an idea. It was a sorry-for-myself, fed-up, last-ditch-attempt idea but, at the time, it seemed like a perfectly reasonable course of action. He hailed a taxi and sat back as it took him to the company building across the city. This time he waited while catering staff unloaded fresh bread and food from the back of a van and then slipped in the back entrance and ran up the staff stairs. When he reached the second floor, he went out into the main corridor and took the lift up another forty flights. From there he simply followed the sounds of mass panic to the main systems room, which was in a perfect uproar. He knew he shouldn’t be there, that it could only end badly. It was rather like rubbing salt in your own wound, but he needed something to keep up the anger he was feeling. As he stood staring at the commotion, a group of well dressed, official looking people entered and started talking excitedly to his father, who was standing at one of the monitors looking over a harassed technician’s shoulder. Being angry, making a point, was one thing, but he had never meant to do anything that would actually damage the project or his father’s career. The files he had shut down were all ones that he had checked were not things that they were working on at present and shouldn’t be needed for at least four weeks. He had left all the files active that they were working on. He sighed and made his way forward to the computer. A technician stopped him just as he was a few metres away. “ You can’t be in here. This project is secure. How did you get in here?” “ I walked. You know, as in one foot in front of the other? Or do you need a picture?” he asked, his voiced laced heavily with sarcasm. He knew he wasn’t being fair; it wasn’t this guy’s fault. The group turned in unison and his father broke away to come up to him. What the hell are you doing here?!” he whispered furiously, pulling him back towards the door. Oh, you’ve actually noticed I’m here. Lucas pulled his arm away roughly and brushed past him to the computer. The technician looked up in confusion. “ Do you want your files back on line?” Lucas asked in a tone that sounded more bored and tired than anything else. He heard the group and his father talking behind him. “ Sir?” the technician asked and then moved away as one of the other men made an impatient movement to him. Lucas sat and quickly went into to the program he had written to re-activate the files, if he decided that he had made his point, before the countdown was up. The screen went blank and then the centre screen showed the double code number boxes, which he typed in and then the programs came up again. Lucas stood up and turned to his father. “ All your files are back on line now. When you’re ready to deal with me I’ll be at the aquarium. Jerry has a number and an address, but I expect you’ll want to... tidy things up here.” And go to hell, while you’re at it. Then he simply walked out leaving them all open mouthed. He didn’t look back to see their reactions. Lori looked up as Lucas came in. “I thought you’d be back before Monday,” she grinned and then stopped when she saw his face. “ What’s wrong?” She got up, concerned. “ I did something really stupid,” he told her, sitting down at the edge of the pool and running his hand through the water. “ It can’t be that bad. I mean... after this,” she made a gesture to the equipment,” What could be such a disaster?” Lucas just looked at her, then turned back to watch the water. “ Do you think the others would mind if I had a chat with her?” he asked dejectedly. “ Of course not. After all it’s your program,” she answered, worried. “ Can I help?” she offered. He shook his head. “ No, but thanks for the offer.” There was buzz from the intercom. “ I’ll be right back.” She got up and went to find out who it was. “ Lucas,” she called after a few minutes, “ your father’s here.” “ Thanks. Can you let him through?” Lori brought his father, and three other men that he remebered vaguely from the systems rooms, in a few minutes later. “ Shall I...” she pointed outside and Lucas nodded. “ If you don’t mind.” “ Sure. Just call if there’s anything you need.” She smiled hopefully at him and left. Lucas continued playing his hands through the water. His father came up and stood near him. “ What on earth were you thinking?” he asked. Lucas looked up at him but couldn’t read his tone or his face. Lucas looked uncomfortably over at the silent group of strangers standing near by and then back at the pool. “ Lucas, I need you to explain yourself. This is very serious. It’s not just the company’s, but the UEO’s project, and there are a lot of other investors.” “ Honestly?” his son asked cynically, looking up again. “ Of course!” “ Try: I wanted you to have a proper reason not to come home.” “ You put the project in jeopardy because I wouldn’t leave a meeting?” “ It wasn’t just one meeting!” Lucas sighed and lowered his voice, forcing his tone to be neutral again. “ Besides, the project wasn’t ‘in jeopardy’. The only files that I shut down weren’t scheduled to be used for at least a month; I checked first. And it was only for a few hours anyway. Even if I hadn’t turned it off, you would only have just noticed before it ended.” “ Why didn’t you talk to me...” he trailed off, realising that his son had tried to. Lucas looked up and grinned wryly, noting the pause. The he looked across at the silent group. “ So, what happens now?” he asked with little concern. “ You’re saying you did this for attention?” one of them asked unsympathetically. Lucas shrugged. “ If you call trying to see your father once, after six months, wanting attention,” he spat back bitterly. The one who seemed to be the highest ranking, or whatever the term was, looked between them for a moment. “ Six months?” he asked Lawrence, curiously. Lawrence looked at Lucas for a moment. “ I guess so.” “ I wasn’t aware that our hours were quite that long,” the man said with amusement. Then he turned back to Lucas. “ You do realise that you committed a crime?” Lucas nodded. “ How about leaving a minor unattended for two weeks?” Lucas said under his breath so that only the two closest heard it. “ No other defence?” the other man continued, as if he hadn’t heard a thing. “ I wasn’t aware that I had given one,” Lucas replied. “ You asked for an explanation,” he addressed his father. The older man sat down on one of the swivelling computer chairs. “ I think that we need to have a little talk. The rest of you can go and look at the fish or go back to headquarters,” he told them dismissively and they left. “ When were you alone for two weeks? I thought I always had some one there...” “ You were going to take time off at Christmas and you told the ‘replacements’ that they didn’t need to come. Guess you forgot, again,” he couldn’t help adding. “ I’m sorry. I think that was the two weeks when we had a problem about the tectonic plates in the region. I had to stay and make sure that the project was safe to continue, that we didn’t have to move the site.” “ So I guess there was an earthquake at graduation, and a landslide, maybe, over the weekend,?” “ That wasn’t any reason to....” “ Those were just the important times. And yesterday.” “ Look I’m sorry I was busy...” “ Well, you shouldn’t be, because you chose to do it. You don’t need to be working all the time. You want to or at least that’s what you choose to do.” He turned away furious for this outburst, suddenly remembering that there was still the old UEO guy, watching them with interest. It was silent for a while. “ Well, it seems that there was no real damage done and no intent to cause any, but I’m afraid that we can’t just let people hack into our systems. I don’t think that we need to take any official action on this though, as the motivation seems to be based, and only had effects of, a personal nature. I think, though, that I would strongly recommend some sort of parental supervision. It seems like this is just as much your fault as your son’s,” he ended pointedly and got up. Lucas looked up at him in surprised disbelief. “ It seems like you had a lot to pay the project back for,” he said smiling sympathetically. “ I don’t think you’re going to do this again.” He raised his eye brows and Lucas shook his head quickly. “ But I’d like you to check in with me, let’s say twice a month, for a while just to make sure that there aren’t any further... temptations.” So he wasn’t just off the hook. “ Like parole, you mean.” “ Well, let’s just say it’s a pre-planned friendly chat,” he replied comfortingly. “ And I think that it would be only fair if you helped the company with their security as you seem to be aware of its faults. Apart from that, I don’t see the need for there to be further action to resolve this matter.” He turned to go. “ And Lawrence, take the day off,” he ended exasperated. “ Thank you,” Lucas called after him. “ I am sorry.” The other man smiled. “ Let’s all just have a nice day for what’s left of the weekend.” “ Lucas play?” the speakers were up on high, to cut through the talk of the ten researchers from the day before, and hadn’t yet been turned down, so the voice echoed off the walls and round the room. The UEO man stopped abruptly, looking around for the source of the voice and Lori hurried in from the other room, hearing the noise. “ Sorry. I thought I heard.... sorry....” she started to leave again. “ It’s all right now,” Lucas called after her. “ Besides, you’ve got a right to be here.” She smiled and hurried across to the pool reaching over for the vocorder. She splashed her fingers in the water and Mara surfaced. “ Hello, Lori.” The speakers echoed. Lucas reached over and turned them down, oblivious to the other two in the room. “ Hello,” she smiled. “ Where have you been?” “ Playing. Mike teach new game.” “ They’re changing the show,” she explained to Lucas. “ Kilajuaea is being moved to a pre-release centre, on the coast, at the end of the week and they wanted to get something new sorted out before we get busy with that.” “ What new game?” Lucas asked. “ Jump high. Turn. Play catch.” “ They wanted something interactive and we thought that we could get one of the kids to throw the ball.” Lucas nodded. “ Why didn’t you come earlier?” she asked, confused as Mara always heard her and came in to see her when she arrived. “ Many people. Strangers. People- shark.” Lucas frowned at Lori. “ Shark?” “ Like shark? What do you mean ‘people- shark’?” she asked. “ Fight. Attack. No need. Not to eat.” Lori looked across at Lucas. “ Aggression? Anger” Lucas nodded considering, “ Possibly.” “ Which people?” Lucas frowned for a moment and then he looked round, remembering. The UEO man had dropped his coat on a chair and come back into the room, now he came up to the tank and stared at the dolphin. His father was staring blankly into the water. Then he stared at the two of them. “ Were you just having a conversation with that fish?” he asked in a strange voice. “ Mammal,” Lori corrected, irritated by his all-too-common lack of knowledge. “And yes, we were. But it’s still very new. We only tried the program, for the first time, yesterday. As you can see we still haven’t got a vocabulary for ‘ideas’ and abstract concepts yet. We needed to make sure that our basic vocabulary was correct before we could start trying to define things like that. There’s also the grammar; dolphins don’t need to have linear grammar to understand things. Sorry,” she said quickly turning round to Lucas. “ This isn’t some strange scientist’s joke,” the man asked uncertainly. “ No,” Lori answered impatiently. “ Did it sound like a set- up to you? Or do you think we had a vision that we were suddenly going to have a roomful of strangers here, when we haven’t even had a visit from another aquarium for four months, let alone the UEO?” “ This is unbelievable. But... How is this possible?” he turned back to her, openly astonished. “ Well, I think you’d better ask Lucas,” she pointed out. “ It’s his program. He just let us listen in.” The UEO man’s eyes opened wider still. “ This was the project you finished yesterday?” Dr Wolenczak asked suddenly. Lucas nodded at the water. “ We weren’t going to tell anyone until we’d had time to test it some more, learn a bit about it. I finished it on Friday, but yesterday was the first time we actually ran it. It’s still got problems and, of course, we need to work on expanding and correcting the vocabulary banks. We just didn’t know if it would work until we turned it on yesterday because we couldn’t test it as we went along.” “ But you designed it: wrote it?” “ Yes,” Lucas replied, somewhat defensively. “ By yourself?” “ I wanted it to be mine.” The room was silent again for a moment. “ Lucas play?” Mara asked. “ Later or tomorrow,” Lucas replied. “ OK?” “ Yes,” the computerised voice answered and then Mara swam off and out into the open part of the tank. Lucas finally turned round. His father was looking at him in bewilderment. I didn’t realise,” he said numbly. “ Realise what? Or didn’t you read any of the things that I sent you about it? Guess not.” “ This is what you wanted to see me about?” Lucas’ father repeated. “ That and talking about my life and what I’m going to do with it, now that I’ve graduated.” The UEO man coughed. “ Graduated? College?” “ Stanford.” “ Well, this is all quite extraordinary. Would it be all right if I came back on Monday with some other people to discuss it with you?” Lucas thought for a moment. “ I don’t want loads of people to know about it yet, until I’ve had a chance to work through it a bit more, get to know what I’m dealing with.” “ Fair enough- just me and two others.” “ OK. But not too many people. The dolphins don’t like a lot of strangers in here; it’s kind of private.” “ Deal.” He got up, shaking his head and shook hands with Lucas. “ I still can’t quite believe it,” he said again as he wandered over to the door, in a daze. Lucas looked back at his father. “ What do you think?” he asked finally, trying to sound as if he didn’t care. “ What do I think?” his father gasped. “ What am I meant to think? It’s incredible, unbelievable... I can’t believe I didn’t realise before. I’m just... well, it’s sort of like watching people landing on the moon, I guess, for the first time. I really don’t know what to think.” Lucas squinted at him and then grinned. “ I think I’ll take that as a compliment.” Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999 Date: Sat, 03 Apr 1999 21:18:09 +0100 From: Alexia/Sabrina Subject: Repost: A House of Windows: Part 5b Sender: owner-tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu To: seaquest-ff@quixotic.org, sqfanfic@onelist.com, tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu Reply-to: Alexia/Sabrina X-Mailer: Microsoft Outlook Express 4.72.3110.1 Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999 They actually managed to spend the weekend together after that. Well, that Sunday afternoon. His father was gone again when he got up, but there was a message that he would get Jerry to drop by the aquarium to make sure that the UEO scientists didn’t overpower him or do anything that he didn’t want. When they did arrive they were, at first, contemptuously sceptical, then amazed and fascinated. Lucas found himself very glad that there was someone else there to help him stand up against their numerous requests and he managed to confirm the fact that they weren’t to make the information public, or known to any others, without first obtaining his written permission. He spent the next few weeks learning about the system he had designed. There were few major technical faults but the development of the vocabulary and the level of communication was a much larger hurdle that he knew would take a long time to even start to conquer. He enjoyed the recognition up to a point, but was much more content studying the system than displaying it which Lori, luckily, was eager to do instead. He relished the first few moments of people seeing the vocorder in action, for the first time. Their initial reactions, when being introduced, were always of surprise then condescension, when they saw how young he was. Then they would go across to Mara and the looks would change to utter amazement, shock and joy at such progress. Then they would look back at him and their faces would fall, go blank, and he found himself enjoying their intense discomfort with open delight. On the surface he let the praise and admiration for his work, go to his head. The way he talked and acted seemingly became conceited, but he only felt worse within and more alone. At least this way, people had a good reason not to like him or want to be around him, so that he didn’t have to come up with an excuse for them, or for himself. The next month went very well. It was busy, but full of triumphs, except for one thing. After a few days of coming home for a few minutes in the evenings, a phone call for a few days after that, his father seemed to have forgotten the incident and the ‘parental supervision’. After that, Lucas found he simply couldn’t enjoy the project as he wanted to. What hurt most was that he had really thought that things were going to change, but, again, they didn’t. It was easier when you didn’t suddenly believe that it was going to be different, only to find that it was a mistake. He had really thought that, once his father had seen the project, he would find time for him, if only because of its scientific value. Now he wasn’t sure whether he wasn’t there because of the project or despite it. And it hurt a lot. The old question was back, nagging away in the corner of his mind. What’s wrong with me? And it had to be that: something about who he was, not even what he did and he wasn’t sure that he would be able to change it even if he did know. He felt depressed most of the time and his anger made him irritable, pushing people away when he meant the opposite, which only made things worse. He found himself putting up walls that were new to him. Whatever made him feel safer, which was usually, and unfortunately, cocky arrogance that he didn’t feel in the least, but which was very convincing to anyone who didn’t know him better and, of course, faced with that, they didn’t try. Half the time he didn’t even realise he was doing it as it was so much a subconscious protection. He found that the only people he could act normally with were Lori, Jerry and the dolphins. Mercifully the project gave him someone to talk to anytime he wanted, someone that wasn’t going to hurt him and would return affection in whatever amount he gave it. That was when the first mention of ‘discipline problems’ came up. These ‘problems’ stemmed mainly from one day when Lucas got fed up with the project, when he was feeling particularly vulnerable and switched the computers over to play a mindless game for a while, which did not impress the UEO scientists one bit. Neither did the fact that he was in charge and they could only observe. One observer was particularly old school and the fact that a ‘precocious, impertinent child’ had designed and written the system that was the largest break through in inter-species communication only made him more critical than was needed or appropriate. Partly it was Lucas’ ‘lack of respect’, or at least lack of submission to their ideas, that most kindled his dislike, causing him to report faults in him that were either exaggerated or wholly fabricated, subconsciously through his general ill will towards him. At all events the news came to his father, who was not best pleased, but still too occupied to give it anything more than passing mention. It was with great surprise that he found his father home one evening when he arrived back from the aquarium, but he was too wary to hope that this was the sign of any new attempt, on his father’s part, at being around more often. That only left it as something of life or death importance. He put his stuff down and sat warily, waiting for the bad news, ideas of its subject running unclearly through his mind. “ I needed to talk to you about things,” his father started pedantically. I’ve been considering the options and discussing matters with various people and I think that we have finally reached a decision which will be the best solution for you and your care, at the present time.” He coughed uncomfortably. “ Today I had a call from Admiral Noyce of the UEO. They are re-launching their most powerful vessel as a science and research boat and they thought that this would be ideal for you to be able to continue your studying, by practical work and research. You would also have all the time you wanted, and some of the best help available, to finish your project,” he continued quickly. “ He said that several of the scientists who you’ve been working with have complained of disciplinary problems and I think that this would be a wonderful chance for you to learn self control. The admiral also said that the UEO were wary of this technology falling into the wrong hands and, as it is such a great advancement, where all the possible applications and uses are not yet known, that they would feel safer if the research was carried out under their supervision and security as, for the moment, it is still an unknown quantity and therefore a possible threat to security,” he told the wall self righteously. “ Communicating is a threat to security?” He was trying not to think about the other things that he had just heard. “ It would also be a chance for you to be among some of the top minds in your field. It would be a terrific career move, the best thing that has come up so far and there will be plenty of people to look after you. The project just hasn’t left me as much time to be here as I need to and so I think that this would be better than for you to stay here, alone, so much. I know that I’ve let you do it for a while now, but I really can’t let it go on. I got Jerry to bring me the files on the boat and the other scientists and they all seem to be the very best of the best and admiral Noyce assured me that it would be quite safe, as it is no longer a boat intended for fighting, though it still has the necessary equipment should the need arise.” He stopped finally, realising that he was waffling in his nervousness. “ I’ve arranged for you to get there a week early to get used to it and to meet everyone first. That will give you another month or so here to complete any research that you need to conduct at the aquarium.” “ You told them that I was going to go? You made the decision without asking me? Well, suppose I don’t want to go. In fact I can tell you right now that I don’t! I don’t want to be stuck on some military ‘boat’? What do you mean by a ‘boat’, anyway? Did it ever occur to you that I might not want to go anywhere you chose, that I do have a life and friends here and that I don’t just sit around here when I’m not working, waiting for you not to come home? I don’t even know what and where this place is and yet you’ve already decided that that’s it; I’m going because you can’t be around, never mind about what I want, what I feel about this. If you want to go fine, but you can’t just make the decisions for me without even consulting me first, even explaining it!” He stopped for breath, pacing furiously, fear fuelling his anger. “ What did you mean when you said ‘boat’?” His father shifted uneasily. “ Well it’s a submarine actually. You’ve probably heard of it: the seaQuest? Well, the UEO thought...” “ I don’t give a da** about ‘what the UEO thought!’ I am not going! I’m not going to live on a submarine. I hate the military and I hate war. And I’m not going to be cooped up in some tin can going all over the place, not being able to chose where I am or go where I want to. I don’t want to be sitting in the middle of the ocean, under the ocean, no sunlight or anything. I don’t want to be ordered around the whole time and stuck with a bunch of macho idiots running around with guns. Do you really think that it’ s going to be ‘science and exploration?’ The UEO’s biggest and most powerful whatever it is? Why do you think they’re keeping the weapons? I don’t want to end up in the middle of a war! I want to stay on top of dry land, where I can walk around if I want, sit on the grass if I want, go and see my friends, meet new people... everything. And I won’t go. It’s my life!” “ But I can’t be here to look after you.” “ I don’t care about that... Yes, I want you to be here; I want you to stop ignoring me, talk to me, just be around, but I don’t care if what it means, otherwise, is having to leave everything I’m used to! I couldn’t stand to be stuck in one place, not having a choice about what I was doing or where I was. I wouldn’t just be able to walk out, I’d be stuck there! If I’m going to be stuck somewhere, at least it could be somewhere where I could take a walk or a holiday! Besides, exactly who out of the UEO’s navy is going to have time to ‘look after me’, as you put it? I’ll be much more alone there. At least here I have friends who care about me, even though you obviously don’t give a da**!” “ That’s not true,” he said quietly. “ Then why don’t you ever want to see me?” There was a long silence. “ I’m sorry, but I still think that this is the best solution and I’ve made the decision. It’s already been arranged.” “ Not with me! I’m not going. You can’t do this.” “ I can and I will do what I think is best for you.” “ Since when have you cared about my best interests?” Lucas spat at him. “ I’m sure that once you’re there... You just have to get used to the idea. After all, this will give you the chance to continue with your research and to do more, to take part in the foremost studies. Or is there something else that you had planned?” “ No, but anything’s got to be better than this.” “ Look, I’ve called in a lot of favours, with people that I have to continue to work with, to get you onto that boat and I’m not going to have you make me look like a fool by refusing to go.” “ I’m so glad you have my best interests at heart!” “ You may not be able to understand it, but this really is for your own good.” “ I do understand. I’m not a child. Young doesn’t mean stupid or doesn’t a degree prove that to you?” “ I’m getting very tired of this argument. It’s hardly surprising if I don’t come home when you’re only going to speak to me like this and throw everything I’m doing for you...” “ It’s not for me and I’m fed up of you using everything you can for an excuse. You’re just like my mother; you lie about things when it’s obvious to both of us what the truth is. But I guess if you keep lying you start to believe it, after a while. Just don’t lie about why you don’t come home, don ’t say that you really care about me or you wouldn’t spend so much time away and you’d answer my calls, you’d ask me before you decided on my future. Just don’t lie about it because really it won’t convince either of us. I just wish you’d tell me what it is about me that you can’t stand so much.” He stood almost trembling, trying to keep the anger in his voice, rather than the tears that confrontations always brought fast on the heels of shouting. His father sat staring at him, emotions changing slowly in his face. “ Forget about it.” He turned round and walked back out of the flat, running when he got into the street until he couldn’t breathe and he sat down behind the park wall, sobbing. Should I have stayed? He never thought that he’d be the one to leave whenever it was that his father finally decided to come and see him, not even once. How could he just leave, when what he wanted was for his father to be there, to talk. But he’d been afraid that he would answer the question and he would finally know what the answer was. It wasn’t the knowing, it was the dealing with it so that he could live with the knowledge, that was the part that he was afraid of. They didn’t talk again about his father’s decision. It soon became clear that there wasn’t any room for him to try and get out of it. His father sold the apartment, so that they would have to leave the week that he was set to arrive at the submarine, anyway. The staff was dismissed and a moving van was hired to take the extra belongings into storage. Finally the aquarium was advised that the UEO had designated the research security sensitive, so that he would have to go if he wanted to continue to work on it. It wasn’t something that he could leave behind. He had fixed on it to give him company ad a sense of love, at least of being able to talk to someone. It gave him a direction and something to do with his time. It was a constant proof that he wasn’t useless and it gave him at least admiration for his work, if not love or care, of a personal nature. It was his. So he packed the few bags that he was allowed to take and spent the last week wandering around, taking in the sunshine and saying good byes. Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999 Date: Sun, 04 Apr 1999 11:07:13 +0100 From: Alexia/Sabrina Subject: Repost: A House of Windows: Part 6a Sender: owner-tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu To: seaquest-ff@quixotic.org, sqfanfic@onelist.com, tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu Reply-to: Alexia/Sabrina X-Mailer: Microsoft Outlook Express 4.72.3110.1 OK, guys, the last part will be posted tomorrow and the not-sequel 'Secrets and Truths' will start on Tuesday or Wednesday. If you want to read S&T I do reccommend that you read over House of Windows , because the not-sequel relies heavily and very closely on certain parts of the first story. Hope you've enjoyed:) Happy Easter everyone:) Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999 Part 6 When the car arrived to take him it was five o’clock in the morning. He’d said goodbye to Lori the night before over dinner beside the pool. Now he waited, looking out at the city shrouded in the mist from the sea, watching the lights slowly go out. Then he picked up his bag and went down stairs and handed his key to the receptionist. The car was waiting at the curb and the driver helped him load the trunk with his luggage, then drove him, in silence, off through the city. In the grey half light the city looked worn and tired, the buildings dirty and forlorn, but it was familiar. Then they broke out of the suburbs and into the country, down the interstate. Why he had chosen to go by car was beyond him. Probably, because he wanted the time to watch the countryside. In the end the silence and the gentle movements, combined with his own tiredness, closed his eyes forcefully as he stared out of the window. When he opened them, it was five hours later. They stopped for lunch along the way, the driver then talking incessantly about the latest golf triumphs as Lucas pushed his food around the plate and stared out of the window, not bothering to look interested or even like he was listening, but the driver never noticed. For the next stage of the journey he took out his laptop and started re-reading the information he had on the boat: its design, its history, and the scientists and navy personnel that were aboard. Mostly he concentrated on the boat itself and the science parts, finding the thought of the military aspect too depressing a topic in his current mood. When the driver finally announced that they had arrived Lucas put away his computer. They were checked through the first barrier, then another and another security check followed that. Finally they pulled over in a small parking area and the man got out to help him unload. “ Bit young to enlist?” he asked, finally noticing, but not overly curious. Lucas shrugged. “ I’m not enlisting,” he replied in a bored tone. He thanked the driver half heatedly. The man smiled at him uncertainly and then got back in the car and pulled away. Lucas stood on the tarmac, watching the car as it left the base. Then he turned and looked around. The docking port was over to the left, a few hundred metres down the concrete front onto the ocean. For a while he stood watching the water. Then he picked up his things and carried on down the causeway, watching the night lights reflecting and bobbing on the gentle waves to his right. A group of other people were talking to the guard by the entrance, checking documents and ID’s with them. He waited, hanging back and staring into the dark water, until they had passed through and then he walked on. He put his bags down and handed his papers over to one of the uniformed guards. They exchanged confused glances. “ You lost, kid?” the second guard asked while the other glanced at the papers. He looked several times at them, at Lucas and at the information on his lists. “ No. He’s signed up as part of the science staff,” the other replied before Lucas had time to say something he would regret. They stared at him for a moment. “ Here, you check it,” the first guard said, passing him the papers. He read through it and then shrugged. “ OK, you can enter. Just go through the linkway and the commander’ll sort you at the other end.” “ Thanks,” Lucas said tiredly, picking up his bags again, stuffing the papers back in his pocket. He looked around briefly, before he set off down through the metal tunnel, at the base and the night sky. At the other end he stopped and looked around for the next person to check in with, to find out where he was meant to be going. A harassed officer was slowly explaining some obvious fact to a crew member, through his teeth. So Lucas set down his bags again and waited, looking around at the grey walls and the pipes overhead, the iron gridwork that was the floor, and not liking it one bit. Eventually the officer finished and sent the man off to do the task he had been set and turned around. He stopped short when he saw Lucas. “ This boat is off limits. How did you get on here?” he asked his voice getting louder and his face clouding further. Lucas handed him the papers. “ Lucas Wolenczak, science staff,” he explained impatiently, fed-up with this all too familiar attitude. The commander hurriedly checked and the rechecked the papers. “ They have to be kidding,” he said under his breath but not quietly enough. He took out his PAL and flicked it on. “ This is Commander Ford. I want to speak to Doctor Westphalen. Now,” he ordered. “ Can you ask her to report to docking port 3?” He shut down the PAL and looked back at Lucas and then turned away muttering under his breath. Luckily they didn’t have long to wait before the doctor arrived. “ What can I help you with, Commander?” she asked politely in reserved English tones. Ford looked towards Lucas. “ Are you expecting a Lucas Wolenczak as part of your team?” he questioned her. “ Yes,” she replied, uncertain where he was leading and then comprehension dawned and she looked back at Lucas with her eyes wider. She was equally astonished by his appearance but determined not to show it like the commander. “ Thank you, commander. I’ll show him to the science labs from here.” She crossed over to Lucas who was listening with interest and not unobservant of the carefully hidden tensions between the two. “ Kristen Westphalen,” she held out her hand, smiling in a friendly fashion. “ Lucas Wolenczak,” he replied, shaking her hand. “ Well, then. I’ll show you to your quarters, so you can put those down and then I’ll take you to the labs. Unless, of course, you’re too tired,” she added considerately. “ I’m fine.” She picked up one bag for him and gestured for him to follow her. “ Admiral Noyce mentioned that he was having a young graduate assigned here. He also said something about a ‘break through’ project you’ve been working on. He just didn’t say you’d be quite so young,” she smiled at him and he could tell she didn’t seem to regard this as an impediment to his abilities, so he smiled back. “ Don’t mind if some of the military people are a bit... well, less the polite about it. They don’t like having us here at all, but they like to pick up on other things as an excuse,” she confided. “ Admiral Noyce said that you had a dolphin on board?” Lucas asked as they walked. He had talked to the admiral several times about the position on seaQuest and his research, after it had been agreed that he was going. “ Yes. Actually he’s coming on board tomorrow. We’re still rather up in the air here, trying to set up the labs and, as I said, the military staff aren’ t exactly as helpful as they could be. At least we have a few days to get things sorted.” She sighed, distracted by the thought of everything that had to be ready by then. “ What species is it?” “ I’m afraid I don’t know. We were due to get a dolphin from a local aquarium but Admiral Noyce changed the plans yesterday, for some reason he hasn’t deigned to explain to me. Anyway, these are your quarters,” she opened the door and Lucas wandered in and slowly put down his bags. “ I’m going back to the labs now and you’re welcome to come if you like,” she offered. Lucas nodded and followed her down more grey corridors, trying not to notice the people staring at him as they passed. With every passing moment this place- where he would be living, working, sleeping and breathing for the next, God knows how many months or weeks- seemed worse and more dismal. Not to mention the fact that everyone here would look on him as a complete child, nuisance and just there because of a call to the right person- which was true, as he certainly wouldn’t have been there of his own accord. He knew that he wasn’t going to be able to ignore their condescension, and ignorant assuptions about age and intelligence, for long without saying something. The whole place was a nightmare, from the look of it and probably had stupid rules for everything that went on- and he was going to be stuck there. He felt tired, alone and terribly unhappy, all this only exacerbated by the fact that he couldn’t leave if he wanted to. Luckily, the doctor had fallen to her own thoughts, as he wouldn’t have heard anything she had said. Then they arrived in the labs. Lucas looked around for a moment and for the first time since he arrived on the base he smiled and felt that, maybe, this wasn’t going to be the disaster that it seemed, that it might just be bearable, that it might just be... fun? enjoyable? The equipment was state of the art and then some; how about the most beautiful man made room on earth? Kristen looked at him with amusement as he wandered past the computers and other equipment, gazing raptly. “ I’ll take you though to C deck and the moonpool. That’s where the dolphin will be a lot of the time,” she said, smiling herself. Lucas looked around the room and into the pool, already planning how he would set up the equipment. There was certainly twice the space they had at the aquarium. A young tech had followed them in and went up to Westphalen to ask her about the set up some of the equipment. “ Will you be all right from here?” she called to Lucas. He nodded, still wrapped up in looking around himself and planning. The next day he made his way back to the science section, to find himself in the midst of a loud argument between the commander and the doctor. The rest of the science staff were mostly continuing with their work, setting up the equipment and unpacking it, labelling and checking of items on book long lists. The military staff stood clustered in a small group by the doorway watching with amusement. Lucas moved closer to get an idea of what the fuss was all about. “ I have no confirmation of the arrival of this equipment,” Ford was saying. “ I therefore cannot let it remain on board, as it is a possible security threat.” “ Well then, check with your superiors to get authorisation!” Westphalen argued. “ Look, commander, if Admiral Noyce’s office put it through it can hardly be a great threat to security. Why don’t you call and ask them what it is before you man handle it again?” The commander looked at her furiously and then walked off into the corridor to talk on his Pal. Lucas pushed his way through the crowd with a sinking feeling as to what the boxes contained. The commander shoved past him roughly. “ OK, it’s cleared. It seems that it’s the property of a Lucas Wolenczak.” He had clearly already forgotten about him or at least his name form the evening before. “ I suggest you find him and get him to explain to you what all this is.” Lucas stepped forward, interupting abruptly. “ It’s the equipment for the research that I’m doing,” he explained with forced patience. Ford’s gaze darkened at his tone and looked at Westphalen to continue to explain this. Typical. She shrugged. “ The admiral mentioned something about an advanced project, but I’m afraid that I can’t tell you anymore than that.” Ford sighed. “ Well, I suggest that you talk to the Admiral and try to find out exactly what it is that you’re meant to be working on here,” he said patronisingly. Westphalen’s face grew dark. “ I am quite aware of what I’m doing here, Commander. It seems that you don’t know what you’re doing when you won’t let equipment through from your own people.” With that she turned away and started giving orders to her staff as they hovered beside her. Ford glared at her and then left. Lucas went up to the boxes and started to check what was there. Eventually Westphalen came over to join him. “ I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to cause an argument,” he told her apologetically, feeling sorry for her, and a certain allegiance against the commander. “ It’s not your fault. I just wish that they would just leave us alone to do our job.” She sighed. “ I better go and find out what’s happening with Admiral Noyce before we have a major disaster on our hands.” She looked at the boxes sitting in the middle of the labs. “ We’ll need to move these. I take it that it’s something to do with the dolphin.” Lucas nodded. “ I’ll need to set up by the pool.” “ Good. Then I’ll get someone to help move this in there. At least we can get those military blockheads to carry things, if they’re going to hang around here to annoy us.” She grinned blackly and headed over to the doorway and stopped two of the personnel passing by and dragged them in to help, giving them orders about the transport of the equipment, after which she hurried off. Lucas trailed behind the men carrying his equipment, not sure whether to offer to help or just stay out of the way. They deposited the boxes and then left, whispering, but the only words that Lucas could catch were, “ Noyce” and “ some bigwig scientist’s kid”. He tried hard to ignore this, glaring at them as they left and making a somewhat impolite gesture, then bent over the boxes to unpack them and then set up the equipment. When he was connecting the various components to the main computer and the power supply points, a middle aged, balding man came in looking around the room and into the corners worriedly. Lucas paused and watched him for a moment. After the man had looked all round the room, into the neighbouring ones and passages ways and found no one else about he turned back and saw Lucas by the equipment. Surprise registered on his face and he coughed uncomfortably. “ There any scientists ‘round here?” he asked, not unfriendly, but clearly thrown off balance by Lucas and the thought of having to converse with one of these ‘scientists’. “ No.” He stood up brushing his hands off down his jeans. “ Well, I guess I’ m part of the science section,” he said considering it. “ Can I help?” he finished, not very politely. The other man looked at him and around the empty room and then gave in. “ I’ m looking for someone to talk to about this dolphin that they want to bring in.” “ Well, if it’s something about the dolphin itself I could help, but if it’s about arrangements, I guess you’d better go down to the labs and talk to one of the people there,” he suggested sensibly. “ Yeah, I think I better do that,” the other replied still with the note of caution in his voice as he left. Lucas sighed and squatted down again by the console to try to figure out the nonsensical order of the boats attachment ports. “ Who designed this?” he muttered to himself as he sought for the next port, finding it, for some reason, at the other side of the board. He sat up again when he heard people coming back into the room. Dr Westphalen was discussing the ‘loading’ of the dolphin with the same man as before. She paused when she saw the equipment and the set up in progress, then talked some more with the uniformed man. After a while he nodded and talked into his PAL. Then they waited, occasionally he nodded something as the person on the other end talked, sometimes he would repeat it for Westphalen. Finally he shut it, sighing with relief. They walked down to the pool as the water started to lap harder at the edges. Finally a dark shape appeared under the metal wall and the dolphin surfaced, chirping loudly. Lucas smiled and leant beside them putting his hand down into the water and petting the animal in a friendly greeting. “ What’s his name?” he asked Westphalen, but it was the man who replied. “ Darwin. He’s a friend of the...” he trailed off. “ Do you know what his history is?” Lucas continued petting and the dolphin chirped at him happily patting the water and then swimming off to explore. I mean, was he at a aquarium before? Was he rescued...?” “ I’m afraid I don’t really know the right story about that. But there will be someone who does, arriving soon and I’ll get him to come and tell you,” he replied evasively. “ Well, doctor, I’ll leave you to take it from here,” he looked with confusion between the dolphin, Lucas and the doctor, for once finding himself much more at ease with her, a scientist, than anyone else in the room. He turned and walked off shaking his head muttering something about ‘children’ and ‘fish’ that luckily the others didn’t catch. As he left, a tech came hurrying in and rushed over to Westphalen for help. She turned away from the pool with a wry smile and led the way, as the other explained the latest disaster that had occurred, listening with patience that she was far from feeling. And she still hadn’t talked to Noyce. She just hoped that it could wait without the result being disaster. In a few hours the system was set up. He just had to switch it on and they should be all set. He started flicking the switches and watched with careful contentment as it checked itself and loaded onto the computer system. Then he positioned the speakers and checked that the volume was right. He turned to the moonpool and switched on the vocorder, sitting down beside the dolphin who had resurfaced and was splashing the water happily. “ Let’s get acquainted.” “ Commander, someone’s running a system off the main computers.” Ford rubbed his hands across his face. “ Where?” “ C deck, Sir.” “ With me, Mr. Ortiz.” He sighed heavily, for the thousandth time that day, and left the bridge. “ And get Westphalen down there, now! I’m fed up of these little surprises. Haven’t they got any idea of security?!” Ortiz quickly handed over his station, for someone else to finish the diagnostics checks, and hurried after Ford, jogging to keep up. “ Lucas play?” Lucas laughed and checked the readings on his computer. “ Not yet, Darwin. I still need some more time to sort out the acoustics in here. The echo is confusing the translating system.” At least it had been easy to get across his and Darwin’s own name, which, of course, the translator could not do without an explanation first, as he had leart from teaching Mara. “ Is what?” “ That’s what turns your clicks and whistles into words that I can understand and my words into sound that you can understand.” “ Talk!” “ Yes, talk,” he laughed modifying the angle of the speakers again. “ So tell me more about the island?” “ Small. Many fish.” “ Oh, sorry. Are you hungry?” “ Not understand?” “ Want fish?” Lucas re-phrased. “ Yes.” “ OK, give me a minute. I don’t know what the system is for that, but I can...” He got up to find someone to ask, setting the computer down away from the water on a spare surface. Then he looked up and noticed the two uniformed men in the doorway, but before he had a chance to say anything Westphalen ran in from the other entrance and stood looking around at the equipment by the tank, her eyes wide. “ Was that... did... you were just talking to Darwin?” she asked eventually. Lucas grinned. “ It’s cool, isn’t it?” Then he frowned. “But I still haven’t got the echo sorted and it’s making a mess of some of the vocab. I thought Admiral Noyce explained about my program,” he said, confused and surprised that no one on board seemed to have a clue why he was even there. She shook her head silently and bet over the monitor. “ This isn’t some sick joke,” she asked, turning back to him sharply. “ No,” he told her abruptly. “ I think I’ll sit down,” she said, blankly staring at the wall. Then she turned back to him. “ I want you to explain exactly what I heard just now and how it’s possible.” “ Well, I...” “ Doctor, we need to talk,” Ford interrupted, advancing into the room. “ Not now, commander,” she told him impatiently and then turned back to Lucas waiting for his reply. “ Now, doctor,” Ford insisted. “ No one told us anything about running programs off our computers. We need to know before people use our systems. We have security procedures to go through...” “ You want to talk to me about security? Commander did you...” “ Who helped you set this up anyway?” Ford asked gesturing to the consoles. “ No one,” Lucas answered with annoyance. “ You set this up by yourself,” he repeated with decision. Lucas nodded, rolling his eyes with pained resignation, and opening his mouth to speak. Luckily, he was interrupted. “ How did you get into the system anyway?” Ortiz turned to Lucas. “ You need a password and...” “ I just bypassed it.” Lucas shrugged lightly. “ So you set up this equipment, bypassed all our security and connected to our system without anyone helping you? This is beyond belief! Doctor” he said turning to her, “ I can’t possibly work with your people doing what they want without any regard for procedure or security, which I assure you is very necessary and I can’t deal with people who aren’t going to give me truthful answers to my questions.” “ It is the truth,” Lucas with quiet fury. “ If your security is that bad you shouldn’t be surprised when people can bypass it and as to the system it isn’t that complicated, well, apart from the fact that whoever designed and programmed it had no sense of logic!” “ Darwin eat!” the speakers commanded. Lucas turned away from the irate commander, ignoring him, to Westphalen. “ What are the feeding arrangements?” he asked, pleased at the frozen expression on Ford’s face. “ We had some fish delivered earlier. It’s waiting to be loaded. Commander, do you think you could get it brought through now?” she asked. “ Our guest seems to want lunch and I think that it would be against regulations to treat the crew properly.” Ford looked over at Ortiz, who nodded and left, staring back, as he went, just as older man came wandering into the room. Ortiz jumped, noticing the man’s rank, and saluted quickly before leaving. “ Lucas, I see you’ve met Darwin. Is the system set up yet?” Noyce asked brightly, apparently oblivious to the atmosphere of tension in the room. Lucas restrained from glaring again at Ford as he turned. “ There’s a problem with the echo, but I’ll have it worked out soon. That is, if I can continue to run it though the main systems,” he ended, staring pointedly at Ford. Noyce took his meaning and looked over at Ford who was still staring blankly in front of him. “ Commander, is there a problem?” Ford seemed to ‘snap out’ of it, still forgetting to salute. “ I... um...” At that moment Ortiz returned, with another man, carrying a refrigerated container, which they put down beside the pool. “ That’s the fish,” he panted. Lucas nodded and they open the box together. Then he took two out and went over to the pool and Darwin opened his mouth eagerly as Lucas passed him one fish, then another, the others looking on. “ More?” Lucas asked. “ Darwin enough,” he asked. “ Darwin not hunt. No fish.” “ You just have to ask when you want more fish,” Lucas smiled. “ OK?” “ Yes. Good fish.” The speakers approved before Darwin submerged and swam off again. “ Was that... did the fish say that?” Ortiz asked beside him. “ Mammal,” Lucas corrected, resignedly, with great annoyance. “Actually, dolphins have a higher EQ- encephalisation quotient, the ration of brain surface area to body surface area- than chimpanzees: more than double, in fact, they are closer to humans in intelligence.” “ But that was him talking?” Lucas nodded, trying not to smirk. “ It’s impressive isn’t it?” Noyce said and then faced Ford. “ What was the problem commander?” Ford blinked at him. “ This is... it really...” “ Inter species communication, Commander, and I assure that it is quite for real.” Ford stared at him an then at Lucas, completely disbelieving and then shook himself. “ Are there any other... things... that we should be aware of, sir?” “ Not that I know of,” Noyce replied innocently. “ Was that all?” Ford nodded. “ I would appreciate it, doctor, if you would tell me before your people use the system and if they could keep it to authorised access. I ’ll need to talk to you about how you got though our security later,” Ford told Lucas, who glared at him as he turned back to the Admiral. “ I just wanted to have a last word with you about...” Noyce looked at him meaningfully and Ford seemed to grasp his meaning. “ If you’ll come this way, sir,” he said, leading him out of the room. Ortiz was talking o his PAL, then he came back over to the pool. “ I was just speaking to our communications expert. He has to see this. I hope you don’t mind,” he added quickly. Lucas shook his head. “ If he’s interested, I need someone who knows some more about linguistics. We’re building up a vocabulary but as you can see it’s still missing a lot.” “ The first real break through in inter species communication and you’re worried about missing a few words!” Westphalen was regarding him with uncomfortable intensity. “ Now, tell me, how this is possible,” she insisted with determination. “ Many caves. Smooth walls, not on island.” “ Caves?” Westphalen asked, frowning. “ Rooms,” Lucas explained, translating and making a note to add this to the definitions. “ No sand. Water clean. Water empty.” There was a clatter as someone nearly fell down the stairs. Lucas looked over at the man tying to regain his balance, still staring at Darwin. He pulled himself upright again and continued down the stairs. “ Doctor, Lucas, this is Lieutenant O’Neil, communications. Tim, this is Darwin and Lucas. You know the doctor.” O’Neil looked between them for an explanation. “ You’re actually talking with the dolphin,” he asked with the most clear response to the situation that Lucas had heard yet and he prepared to explain it all again, wondering if it was worth the hassle. Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999 Date: Sun, 04 Apr 1999 23:08:00 +0100 From: Alexia/Sabrina Subject: Repost: A House of Windows: Part 6b Sender: owner-tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu To: seaquest-ff@quixotic.org, sqfanfic@onelist.com, tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu Reply-to: Alexia/Sabrina X-Mailer: Microsoft Outlook Express 4.72.3110.1 Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999 “ It’s the biggest thing in communications since e-mail!” O’Neil was telling his friend. “ And he’s only 15!” “ And a college graduate. But that’s my question. How did he end up here? I mean clearly Noyce had something to do with it but...” Ortiz beckoned as the security chief came in, shifting over as Crocker joined them on hearing, their conversation, hopeful of some gossip. “ I heard that his father is some important scientist and he arranged it as a favour with the admiral. The doc and commander Ford certainly weren’t expecting him,” he confirmed. “ I just don’t know what parent would let their kid go off on a submarine- a military submarine.” “ He certainly isn’t the military type. He really gave the commander some cheek when he got steamed up about the kid using the computer systems.” “ Dam*! I was meant to ask him how he got through our security,” Crocker frowned at the omission. “ Well, I guess it can wait.” The next day, the first thing that Crocker did was call Lucas to the bridge to talk about the security systems. “ Well, it really wasn’t that hard. You haven’t got everything up at the moment so all I had to do was bypass it through switching systems. I don’t know how hard it would be with all the nets in place but I don’t think it will make that much difference. It would take a bit longer, but I could still get through. I’ll try now if you like and tell you where you need to change it,” he offered offhand, as if the systems were no harder than a home PC, to him. Crocker looked over at Hitchcock who shrugged and moved aside for him to work on her console. “ The other security programs are...” “ It’s all right,” Lucas told her. “ I can figure it out.” A few minutes later, he had the full security blocks up. Then he started running possible by pass scenarios, pointing out the faults and the gaps in the system. The other two looked on with surprise and then they set to work tightening the system. “ How did you learn so much about computers?” Hitchcock asked as she studied the chains of programming to identify the place where the gap was in one. “ Guess I’ve just always been interested. It helps to be a hacker when you’ re trying to figure out the faults in something,” he explained. “ That way you know what to try and where to do it, and it’s much easier when it isn’t your own system that you’re checking.” He found the correct line and starting typing in the new commands. “ It could be worse,” Lucas admitted. “ Most of the people here are OK. A few of the really military ones aren’t; the commander obviously can’t stand me. Miguel, Tim and Dr. Westphalen are really nice, though. The Chief’s OK too, I guess.” “ And then there’s the pretty Lieutenant commander.” Lori grinned at his blush. “ The rest of the science staff are OK. I’m not really around much of the other military crew. A few of them mind about my age, but most of them got past it pretty quickly and they’ve been great about the vocorder. Darwin’s really intelligent and friendly so we should make some fast progress. Of course, I’ll tell you everything,” he added quickly, reassuring her. “ I just hope Ford doesn’t decide that it’s all ‘too security sensitive’.” He sighed. “ The people are mostly all right, but it’s not... well, they’re only here to work, so it’s... But, I guess I haven’t really been here long enough to know yet,” he pointed out, trying to be positive. “ I just hate this ‘boat’. I mean I don’t know where I’m going to be in a week. I don’t know when I’ll get back, get on land... and there are so many rules! And it’ s grey and metallic and there’s no where to go if you want to leave. Once you’re on, you’re stuck... But, I don’t really know where else I’d be. And this is the best place for the research, so... Maybe, they’ll get fed up of me and throw me off at the next port,” he laughed, almost hoping that they would. “ At least I’m alone here because I’m here, not because... So how’s Mara?” The change in the conversation was so terribly obvious that he almost winced. Lori looked at him closely. “ She’s fine,” she replied, knowing better than to push him to talk when he didn’t want to. He smiled at her gratefully. She’s misses you. Maybe’ll I’ll put her on next time.” “ Yeah. I’d better go,” he told her hurriedly. “ Take care.” “ You too. I’ll call again tomorrow.” She smiled warmly at him and they both cut their links. After her image had disappeared, he sat back and watched the walls rippling with the effect of the water in the aqua tubes. He didn’t know what he would have done if he didn’t have the vocorder to talk to Darwin with, but then again, maybe if he hadn’t built it he wouldn’t be here. It could be a lot worse, he reminded himself. But it was lonely in the grey, metal, box-like room. It was lonely everywhere, really. And there wasn ’t any choice in the matter. Get up and do something! But all he wanted to do was speak to someone who could reassure him, but he knew he wouldn’t get through and he would only feel worse at being so forcefully reminded of the fact. At least he had a purpose here and there wasn’t anywhere else where there was anyone he really wanted to be with, where he could. None of the people that he cared about, or thought about like that, would let him. He got up quickly with that thought and left the room, walking fast down the echoing corridor. “ Bill! It’s good to see you.” Lawrence stood up from the table to shake his friend’s hand and then they both sat. A waiter came over and they ordered a light wine, as they both had to work the next day. “ So how have you been?” he asked conversationally when the waiter had brought the bottle and served them both. “ I’m fine and I can tell you’re well.” “ Yes,” he replied, sipping the old vintage with pleasure. “ The project is still on track, so far, and everything seems to be working out: no major problems.” “ I’m glad, but I didn’t ask you to come to talk about work. There’s far too much of that in your life, anyway. I wanted you to finally tell me what the hell you were thinking of, sending Lucas off on that boat!” His friend looked away uncomfortably. “ Maybe I should have ordered something stronger. I can see you’re in one of your heart-to-heart talk moods, but I’m afraid I really don’t want to...” he trailed off, knowing that his friend wouldn’t leave it at that, besides it was about time that he tried to figure out what he was feeling. He sighed as his friend waited patiently for him to go though his usual routine. “ Honestly? I don’t know. One day I was at the aquarium and there he was with the most astounding discovery of our time and the next minute I’m calling in favours to get rid of him.” His eyes flickered up to his friends’ for a moment and then down at his plate again. “ I’m a scientist, how could I not be interested in such a breakthrough? I was so proud, well, I still am, but... I meant to go home more, I meant to call, really, I did, and it wasn’t exactly that I forgot, it just... well, I just couldn’t do it.” He frowned at the table for a moment, uncounciously tracing the patterns of the table cloth with an idle finger. “ I’d turn on the vidlink and I’d sit there and then I’d turn it off again. It’s not that I don’t care about him and when I’m with him it’s great, but... Somehow it’s just too hard to get there- the idea of it.” He sighed sadly. “ I didn’t even tell him before I arranged it with Noyce. I just wanted to make sure that there was no backing out, I guess. I really did want to make it impossible for me to see him, maybe so that I wouldn’t feel so guilty, but... I honestly don’t know why I can’t be there for him,” he said sincerely, looking across at his friend for answers. “ How’s Laura?” he asked pointedly, but seemingly off the subject. “ She’s... well, she’s managing. I don’t think she’s any worse than she used to be. She’s working and she has a place, she’s dating, constantly, of course. She never could stand to be alone: not being involved with someone.” He sighed. “You think that you’ll get stuck with the same problems from Lucas? You ran the tests, you know he hasn’t inherited those tendencies. Of course, it’s more than just the genes, but you know better than that. Or does he remind you of her?” “ It isn’t that... I mean, I know he doesn’t have her problems, but... I just needed to get away from all that, so much. I guess he does remind me of her- well, how could he not with those eyes. But it’s other things that are so her. But it’s not just that. I can’t keep up any long term relationship. Do you know that you’re my only real friend, that I can talk to? The only other people I know anymore are the people at work or people I haven’t spoken to in years, that I’ll meet at a conference. Or some person that I date, for what, a week? nothing more than six months, and I do exactly the same thing. I choose to work. I know I don’t have to, but I can’t... I can’t be around people like that. It just gets harder, being with someone, calling, everything, the idea of it more than anything.” He sighed. “ This conversation just goes round in circles.” He laughed bleakly. “ I just don’t want to mess up the only relationship where it’s just one chance, well, you know what I mean.” “ You only have one son and he’s not going to wait forever for you to stop acting like an idiot and a jerk. This is the one thing in your life that you will regret so deeply.” Lawrence looked up at his friend. “ And don’t even suggest it. I am not going to talk to some dam*ed stranger about my problems. I’m not. I don’t care how badly I feel about what’s happened. I just... I can’t believe that I could act like that to someone that I care about and who actually cares about me and forgives me for it. Especially after everything else that happened. I wish he had screwed up the project, that time. At least I wouldn ’t feel so guilty.” “ Maybe you should.” He woke suddenly, in the middle of the night, for no reason. They had left today, but it wasn’t that that bothered him. The hurdle of being stuck on the boat, feeling trapped, was the one he’d already over come. The new movement of the boat didn’t change that. It was just as much a prison still or moving, either way. Once he was on board, he was committed to whatever came after and he had had to relax. He couldn’t spend the next few months terrified every minute. He’d panicked going though the linkway, but at the other end he had forced himself to stay in control and for the next few he had had to, by which time it was too long past. No, once he’d finished that walk, that was it. He didn’t even think of getting off as an option. But there was no where to go anyway and here the people were friendly, just as nice as at the aquarium, so... He shut his eyes and then opened them knowing that he wasn’t going to sleep again for a while. The walls rippled gently and for some reason it always comforted him, always delighted him in the beauty of the water and the light, mingling together, to create such effects. There was something about it that could always make him sad, just as it could always make him feel safe and, somehow, not alone. THE END Copyright E.Casale, 1997, 1998, 1999