Date: Fri, 08 May 1998 21:41:17 -0400 From: corgi@IDT.NET (corgi) Subject: Bribes or How to Rent a Life on seaQuest Act 1 part 1 Sender: owner-tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu To: tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu Reply-to: tales@mcfeeley.cc.utexas.edu Bribes or How to Rent a Life on seaQuest seaQuest's take on Rent Okay if you've seen Rent you know it's a bunch of artists trying to cut out a life for themselves. The play takes you through a year of their lives and how it changes them.... Well what would happen if that happened on seaQuest? Imagine...a seaQuest musical! To catch everybody up I'll explain a little. Jim didn't die, neither did Freddy. That was all a big misunderstanding of course. Miguel didn't die either. He's just coming back from Hyperion a little late, that's all. Tim has taken up film making. Jim has taken up songwriting, and the two of them now share a room. To complete Loonie..I mean Lonnie now thinks she's an actress :P In all this commotion Ben has also returned to seaQuest, with the tale of a new bride Annie. What he doesn't know is Katie has returned too. And Lucas....well.... let's just say Lucas has gone through a lot of changes. Top that off after 3 years of incessant typing on those uncomfortable seaQuest computer terminals half the crew has developed severe Carpul Tonal Syndrome, CT. It's a tragedy they're all learning how to cope with. Tisk tisk tisk. Now forget everything you know about seaQuest. It's not important. Sit back and relax. Imagine....what would happen if seaQuest was a musical? p.s. If you do know Rent you can sing along with these words. They fit the music :) BRIBES or How to Rent a Life on seaQuest ##Tim [spoken] We begin on Christmas Eve with me Tim, and my new roommate Jimbo as I like to call him. We live in a crowded set of crew quarters on the corner of hallway 11 on B deck. This place used to be a broom closet. Jimbo's old Rock posters hang on the walls. They have Jimbo's picture advertising gigs at the mess hall and the assembly room. We have an illegal heating unit in our room since Hudson keeps it so damn cold; it hides nicely under the night stand. We're always huddling on the floor around it. Outside our room there's a party/protest in the assembly hall. Inside we are freezing because we overloaded the outlet and the heater's already held together with duct tape. [He turns to Jim] Smile! #1. Tune Up #1 ##Tim December 24th, 21 hundred, seaQuest standard time >From here on in I shoot without a script See if anything comes of it Instead of my old shit First shot - Jimbo Tuning the Fender guitar he hasn't played in a year ##Jim This won't tune ##Tim So we hear -- HAH! He's just coming back >From a brush with death you see ##Jim Are you talking to me? ##Tim Not at all Are you ready? Hold the vidcam- Steady Tell the folks at home what you're Doing Jimbo ##Jim I'm writing one great song-- ##Tim The phone rings ##Jim Saved! ##Tim We screen Zoom in on the answering machine! #2. Vid Mail ##Tim and Jim's outgoing message Speak! [beeeeeep!] ## Tim's Mom That was a very loud beep I don't even know if this is working. Tim-Tim- are you there Are you screening your calls- It's mom We wanted to call and say we love you And we'll miss you here tomorrow Cindy and the kids are here send- Their love Oh, I hope you like lens wipes! Just don't rub to hard dear When you clean your specs Oh and Tim We're sorry to hear that Lonnie Dumped you I say c'est la vie So let her be a lesbian There other fishies in the sea ...Love Mom #3. Tune Up #2 ## Tim Tell the folks at home what you're Doing Jimbo ##Jim I'm writing one great song -- ##Tim The phone rings ##Jim Yesss! ##Tim We screen ##Tim and Jim's Outgoing Message Speak [beeep!] ##Miggy Chestnuts roasting-- ##Jim and Tim Miggy! ##Miggy I'm docking #Tim Hey! #Miggy Jimmy picked up the phone?? ##Tim No, it's me ##Miggy Christmas for two ##Tim A wild night is now preordained ##Miggy I may be detained ##Tim What does he mean? [phone rings again] What do you mean - detained? ##Benny Hohoho ##Tim and Jim Benny! Shit ##Benny Dudes, I'm on my way ##Tim and Jim Great! Fuck ##Benny I need the bribe ##Tim What bribe? ##Benny That heater boys, the one you bought ##Tim We bought you said it was a gift? ##Jim When you came back on board #Tim The second visit ##Jim Remember - It's cold here ##Benny How could I forget? You, me, the heater and Loonie How is the drama queen? ##Tim she's performing tonight ##Benny I know Still her production manager? ##Tim Two days ago I was bumped ##Benny You still dating her? ##Tim Last month I was dumped ##Jim She's in love ##Benny She's got a new man? ##Tim Well - no ##Benny What's his name? ##Tim and Jim Freddy! ##Benny Bribes, my amigos, are due Or I will have to report you Be there in a few [At that time Jim tries to plug the heater back in causing....] ##Tim The power blows! #4. Bribes ##Tim How do you document real life When real life's getting more Like sci-fi each day Headlines - Mess lines Blow my mind And now this deadline "Bribe me and pay" Bribes ##Jim How do you write a song When the chords sound wrong Though they once sounded right and rare When the notes are sour Where is the power You once had to heat this air ##Tim And we're hungry and frozen ##Jim Some life that we've chosen ##Tim and Jim How we gonna pay How we gonna pay How we gonna pay Benny's bribes ##Tim We sell our junk ##Jim How do you have a sale When there's nothing to sell And it's feels like something's stuck in Your shoe ##Tim How can you generate heat When your on Olie's beat ##Tim and Jim And he's killing you! ##Tim You start up a junk sale ##Jim With posters- ##Tim And screenplays ##Jim and Tim How we gonna pay How we gonna pay How we gonna pay Benny's bribes [cut to Freddy on the phone] ##Freddy Don't scream Lonnie It's me - Freddy Your substitute productions manager Hey hey hey! Did you eat? Don't change the subject Lonnie But Darling - you haven't eaten all day You won't throw up You won't throw up The digital delay-- - didn't blow up exactly There may have been one teeny tiny spark You're not calling Tim! [Scenes cut back and forth between the characters] ##Miggy How do you stay on the ship When in every bay You just might slip And whoa! I did Water's in my shoe Oh can it be true? Everything's blue And ouch! I just slipped ##Tim Where is he? ##Miggy Gettin dizzy ##Tim and Jim How we gonna pay How we gonna pay How we gonna pay Benny's bribes ##Benny Annie baby - You sound sad I don't believe those two After everything I've done Ever since our wedding I'm dirt - They'll see I can help them all out in the long run ##Tim The music ignites the night with passionate fire ##Freddy Lonnie I'm not a theater person ##Jim The narration crackles and pops with incendiary wit ##Freddy Could never be a theater person ##Tim Zoom in as we sell our past to the crew ##Freddy Hello? #Tim and Jim Put up signs so the crew will show ##Freddy Hello? ##Tim [on phone] Hello? Lonnie? -You're equipment won't work? Okay, all right, I'll go! ##Tim and half the crew How do you leave the past behind When it keeps finding ways to get to Your heart It reaches way down deep and tears You inside out Till you're torn apart Bribes ##Jim and the other half of the crew How can you connect in an age Where strangers, Ex-O's, lovers You're own wrist bones betray ##All What binds the hull skin together When the raging shifting tides of change Keep ripping away ##Benny Draw a line in the sand And then make a stand ##Jim Use your vidcam to spar ##Tim Use your guitar ##All When they act tough you call their bluff ##Tim and Jim We're not gonna pay ##Tim and crew part 1 We're not gonna pay ##Jim and crew part 2 We're not gonna pay ##All Benny's bribes Bridger's bribes Olie's bribes Bribes bribes bribes bribes bribes We're not gonna pay bribes ##Tim and Jim Cause everything is bribes! #5. You Okay Honey [the docking bay] ##A nameless ensign Christmas bells are ringing That annoying ringing It's worse then my singing This does not Make sense ##Lulu You okay honey? ##Miggy I'm afraid so ##Lulu Did you hurt your tummy? ##Miggy No I hurt my knee And I think it's sprained Well you'd better go - Thanks ##Lulu You remember me? I'm Lulu ##Miggy Lulu...? Indeed And Lulu boy...girl have you changed I sure have missed you - you've grown up Nice hair ##Lulu Let's get a bandage for your knee I'll change - There's a wrist support Meeting at 21 thirty Yes this body provides a comfortable home For the damned carpul tonal Syndrome ##Miggy As does mine ##Lulu OOH! We'll have a great time Get you a coke have a bite Make a night - I'm flush ##Miggy But our friends are waiting -- ##Lulu You're cute when you blush The more the merry- hohoho And I do not take no #6. Tune up #3 [the quarters] ##Jim Where are you going? ##Tim Lonnie calls... ##Jim You're such a sucker ##Tim I don't suppose you'd like to see Loonie's Show in the hall tonight? Or come to dinner? ##Jim Zoom in on my empty stomach ##Tim Toche. Wear your brace Close on Jimbo He's so cool but he's So alone and so shut out I just wish the guy would get out More #7. One Song Glory ##Jim One song Glory One song Before I blow Glory I've got to get a girl Find one song One last refrain Glory >From the pretty boy front man Who's wasted every girl he's seen One song He had the girls at his feet Glory In their eyes he could see thrill A night's thrill Find Glory Beyond the cheap one night stands One song Before the sunsets Glory- On another empty life Time flies-Fruit flies Glory - One blaze of - Glory Find Glory In a song that rings true Truth like a blazing fire An eternal flame Find One song A song about love Glory >From the soul of a young man A young man Find The one song Before the CT takes hold Glory Like a sunset One song To redeem this empty life Time flies Like wind- and fruit flies they like bananas Time sighs [a knock at the door] Sigh! The door #8. Light My Candle ##Jim What'd you forget? ##Katie Got a light? ##Jim I've seen you - you're - You're shivering ##Katie It's nothing they turned down my heat And I'm just a little week on my feet Would you light my candle? What are you starring at? ##Jim Nothing Your hair in the deck light You look familiar Can you make it? ##Katie Just haven't eaten much today At least the room stopped spinning Anyway - What? ##Jim Nothing Your smile reminded me of ##Katie I always remind people of - Who is she? ##Jim This girl - She was my nurse ##Katie It's out again Sorry to barge in Would you light my candle? ##Jim Well- ##Katie Yeah, ow! ##Jim Oh, the wax- it's ##Katie [very seductively] Dripping! I like it between my - ##Jim Fingers. I figured... Oh well good night [Katie exits then knocks again] It blew out again? ##Katie No - I think that I lost my snap ##Jim I know I've seen you out and about When I used to go out You candle's out ##Katie I'm chillin- It had it when I walked through the door I am sure Is it on the floor? ##Jim The floor? ##Katie They say that I have the best ass below The 11th hallway Is it true? ##Jim What? ##Katie You're starring again ##Jim Oh no, I mean you do - have a nice- I mean - you look familiar ##Katie Like your old nurse friend ##Jim Only when you smile But I know I've seen you somewhere Else-- ##Katie Do you know Lieutenant Ben Krieg That's my old ex - We're through - Help me Look ##Jim Yes! He's got your picture up ##Katie He's a looser ##Jim I didn't recognize you Without the hand cuffs ##Katie We could light the candle Oh won't you light the candle? ##Jim Why don't you forget that thing You look like you're freezing ##Katie I am cold - But I'll get used to it I'm just born to be cold ##Jim I once was born to be cold I used to shiver like that ##Katie There is no heat... It's warm here ##Jim Heater you see ##Katie They're not allowed ##Jim Uh huh You going to report me? ##Katie I really should you know it's - ##Jim Uh huh ##Katie So warm ##Jim [finding the snap] Here it - Um- ##Katie What's that? ##Jim My guitar pick ##Katie We could light the candle What'd you do with my candle? ##Jim That was my last match ##Katie I guess I'll adjust - Thank God for The heat ##Jim Maybe it's not the heat at all I mean you look pretty hot To me ##Katie Go shove it - You love it ##Jim Cold hands ##Katie Your's too Big, like my ex's You wanna dance? ##Jim With you? ##Katie No - With my ex-guy ##Jim I'm Jimbo ##Katie They call me They call me Katie [She leaves sexily snatching the snap out of Jim's hand as she walks past] #9. Vid Mail #2 ##Lonnie's Vidphone message Hi. You've reached Lonnie and Freddy. Leave a message and don't forget "Over the Moon" -- My performance, protesting the Turning off of the heat Tonight at midnight in the crew hall Party in the mess to follow (BEEP) ##Mr. Fredericks Well, Freddy - We're off I tried you at your girlfriend's And she said you're stage managing Or something ##Mrs. Fredericks Remind her that those Navy boys On board Love women like her too ##Mr. Fredericks I can't believe you're not home for Christmas They're killing you out there Just think about the New Year's party would you dear? We'll be in New York for New Year's Unless your mother changes her mind ##Mrs. Fredericks I hear you! ##Mr. Fredericks Of course - Kitten Mummy's birthday blowout begins On the tenth We'll need you - alone- by the sixth ##Mrs. Fredericks Harold! ##Mr. Fredericks You hear that? It's three weeks away And she's already yelling ##Mrs. Fredericks I am not ##Mr. Fredericks For Mummy's sake Kitten No Doc Martins this time and wear a Dress... Oh, and Kitten - Have a Merry ##Mrs. Fredericks And a bra! #10. Today 4 U [the quarters] ##Tim Enter Miguel Ortiz, sonar chief, soldier MIA for six months, who makes even me question my sexuality. ##Tim and Miggy Bustelo - Marlboro Banana by the bunch A locked up Captain Crunch would be So good ##Miggy I wish we could ##Tim Look - It's Santa Claus ##Miggy Hold your applause ##Jim Oh, Hi ##Miggy "Oh, Hi" after seven months? ##Jim Sorry ##Miggy This boy could use some stoli ##Miggy, Tim & Jim Oh Holy Night ##Jim So you're not MIA? ##Miggy They found me down in Cuba Military help you see Is really rather dumb And they did not even look for me Bridger's joke he he Still haven't left the room? ##Jim I was waiting for you don't you know ##Miggy Well, tonight's the night Come to the mess with me after Lonnie's Show ##Tim and Jim Why go? ##Miggy Gentlemen, our benefactor on this Christmas Eve Whose charity is only matched, by A master degree A girl I guarantee that you've Never seen Lulu the girl for me! ##Lulu Today for you - Tomorrow for me Today for you - Tomorrow for me ##Miggy And you should see her feet! ##Jim You've seen his naked feet? ##Lulu It was my lucky day today on deck letter A When a hottie in a submarine docked my way He said "Dahling - Be a dear -Haven't Wept in a year I need your help to make my dark brown Cuban Eyes shed a tear" This requestor seQuestor was so fucked up He believed if I helped him up that he Could grab my very cute and tight Ass I was certain that boy would fuck my ass to death Today for You - Tomorrow for me Today for You - Tomorrow for me He came right up to me - And told me it was Destiny Yes me! He had always had a crush on me Now who could foretell that it would Go so well But sure as I am here Miguel is now in Lulu's hell After an hour my lover - in all his glory In a cold, dark room off the 23rd hallway Told me I was the best fuck that he'd ever had And since he switched to men my boy is never very mad Today for you - Tomorrow for me Today for you - Tomorrow for me I know that this is quite a shock to see But I've been hiding and lying for Quite some time I love being a girl I'm so pretty If you don't think so then you can Deal with Miggy Sing it! Today for you - Tomorrow for me Today for you - Tomorrow for me Today for you - Tomorrow for me Today for you - Tomorrow for me #11. You'll See [knocking on the door of J&T's quarters] ##Benny Hey Tim, Jim, Yeah you open up! I'll tell cap about that space heater ##Tim That attitude towards the whole crew is just what Lonnie is protesting tonight Close up on Benjamin Krieg. He's here our old buddy, Who married Annie Martin of the capeQuest Martins Then got his promotion, with hopes of getting a Command position ##Benny Lonnie is protesting Loosing her precious heat Not my attitude ##Jim What happened to Benny? What happened to his heart? And the ideals he once pursued ##Benny The captain of this sub has got The right to do with it as he pleases ##Miggy Happy birthday Jesus! ##Benny The bribe ##Tim You're wasting your time ##Jim We're broke ##Tim And you broke your word ##Benny There is one way you won't have to pay ##Jim I knew it ##Benny That show has just got to go you see Cause Hudson will chop off my head You want to be warm just as much as me You'll see boys You'll see boys State of the art, digital, personal, interactive heater I'll forgo the bribe and on paper guarantee That you can get heat for free If you do me one small favor ##Jim What? ##Benny Convince Lonnie to cancel her protest ##Tim Why not just get an injunction Or call security? ##Benny I did and they're on standby But my superiors would rather I handle this Quietly ##Jim You can't quietly wipe out an Entire protest Then watch It's a Wonderful Life On T.V. ##Benny You want to make films and write songs? You need some heat to do it! It's what we used to dream about Think twice before you Pooh-pooh it You'll see boys You'll see boys You'll see the beauty of a thermostat That lets us do our work and stay warm With controls in each room Who's knobs keep long tops off Just stop the protest An you'll have it made You'll see boys - Or you'll pay! ##Lulu That boy could use some prozac ##Jim Or heavy drugs ##Tim Or group hugs ##Miggy Which reminds me we have a detour to make tonight Anyone who wants to can come along ##Lulu Wrist support is a group for people Coping with pain You don't have to stay to long ##Tim First I've got a protest to save ##Lulu Jimbo? ##Jim I'm not much company you'll find ##Tim Behave ##Lulu He'll catch up later - he's just got other Things on his mind You'll see boys ##Tim and Miggy We'll see boys ##Jim Let it be boys! ##Miggy I like boys ##Lulu Boys like me ##All We'll see #12, Tango: Maureen ##Tim And so into the abyss...The hall Where a small stage is partially set up. ##Freddy Line in... I went to the Academy for this? ##Tim Close in on Tim's nose dive. ##Freddy Line out... ##Tim Will he get out of here alive...? ##Freddy Tim? ##Tim Hi ##Freddy I told her not to call you ##Tim That's okay But can I help since I'm here? ##Freddy I've called an engineer.... ##Tim Great! We'll nice to have seen you ##Freddy Wait! She's three hours late The samples won't delay But the cable- ##Tim There's another way Say something - anything ##Freddy Test - One, two, three.... ##Tim Anything but that ##Freddy This is weird ##Tim It's weird ##Freddy Really weird ##Tim Fuckin weird ##Freddy I'm so mad that I don't know what to do Fighting with microphones Freezing down to my bones And to top it all off I'm with you ##Tim Feel like going insane? Got a chip in your brain? And you're thinking of drinking Gasoline? ##Freddy As a matter of fact - - ##Tim Honey I know this act It's called the "Tango Lonnie" The Tango Lonnie It's a dark dizzy Merry - Go - Round As she keeps you dangling ##Freddy You're wrong ##Tim Your heart she's mangling ##Freddy It's different with me ##Tim And you toss and you turn 'Cause her cold eyes can burn Yet you yearn and you churn and rebound ##Freddy I think I know what you mean ##Both The tango Lonnie ##Tim Has she ever Pouted her lips And called you "Pookie" ##Freddy Never ##Tim Have you ever doubted a kiss or two? ##Freddy This is spooky Did you swoon When she walked through the door? ##Tim Every time - So be cautious ##Freddy Did she moon over other boys? ##Tim More then moon - - ##Freddy I'm getting nauseous! ##Tim Where'd you learn to tango? ##Freddy With the French Ambassador's daughter in her dorm room At a Macronesian conference And you? ##Tim With Nanette Himmelfarb. This girl at the Scarsdale Community Center. ##Tim It's hard to do this backwards ##Freddy You should try it in heels! She cheated ##Tim She cheated ##Freddy Lonnie cheated ##Tim Fuckin cheated ##Freddy I'm defeated I should give up right now ##Tim Gotta look on the bright side With all of your might ##Freddy I'd fall for her still anyhow ##Both When you're dancing her dance You don't stand a chance Her grip of romance Makes you fall ##Tim So you think "Might as well" ##Freddy "Dance a tango to hell" ##Both "At least I'll have tangoed at all" The Tango Lonnie Gotta dance till your diva is through You pretend to believe her 'Cause in the end you can't leave her But the end it will come Still you have to play dumb Till you're glum and you bum And turn blue ##Tim Why do we love when she's mean? #Freddy And she can be so obscene ##Tim Try the mike ##Freddy My Lonnie ie ie ie ie ie ie ie..... ##Tim Patched! ##Freddy Thanks ##Tim You know - I feel great now! ##Freddy I feel lousy! ##Both The Tango Lonnie! #13. Wrist Support ##Michelle Michelle ##Georgie Georgie ##Callie Callie ##Al Al ##Heather Heather ##Lulu Hi, I'm Lulu ##Miggy Miguel, Miggy ##Meg I'm Meg. Let's begin ##All There's only us There's only this... ##Tim Sorry...excuse me...oops ##Meg And you are? ##Tim Oh - I'm not - I'm just here to - I don't have - I'm here with - Um - Tim Tim - I'm Tim Well - This is quite an operation ##Meg Sit down Tim We'll continue the affirmation ##All Forget Regret of life is yours to miss ##Georgie Excuse me Meg - I'm having a problem With this This credo My fluid is high - I regret that news, okay? ##Meg All right But Georgie how do you feel today? ##Georgie What do you mean? ##Meg How do you feel today? ##Georgie Okay ##Meg Is that all? ##Georgie Best I've felt all year ##Meg Then why choose fear? ##Georgie I'm an English patient Fear's my life Look - I find some of what you teach Suspect Because I'm used to relying on intellect But I try to open up to what I don't know ##Georgie and Meg Because the cortisone should've died Three hours ago ##Miggy Amen! ##All No other road No other way No day but today #14. Out Tonight [Katie's Room] ##Katie What's the time? Well it's gotta be close to midnight My body's talking to me It says "Time for danger" it says "I wanna have a good time Wanna be the cause of a fight Wanna put on a tight skirt and flirt With a stranger" I've never had such a crack At breaking the rules though I hate this game Get up - Life's to quick Ben Krieg is a dick This chic wants to burn in the pain We don't need any money Us chics will get in for free Jim can get in too If he get's in with me Let's go out tonight You wanna play? Let's run away We won't be back Before it's Christmas day Take me out tonight Meow When I get a wink from the floor man Do you know how lucky you'll be? That you're online with the feline of Deck letter B Let's go out tonight I have to go out tonight You wanna prowl Be my night owl? We'll take my hand we're gonna howl Out tonight In the evening I've got to roam Can't sleep in the quarters of plasteal and chrome Feels to damn much like home Where I used to fly seaQuest needs a bar So dark we forget who we are And all the scars of the Nevers and maybies die Let's go out tonight Have to go out tonight You're tall Wanna hit the hall Wanna wail at the moon like a cat in Heat Just take me out tonight Please take me out tonight Don't forsake me - I'll let you take me - Out tonight Tonight tonight tonight #15. Another Day [Tim ad Jim's quarters] ##Jim Who do you think you are Barging in on me and my guitar Pretty girl - hey The door is that way You better go you know The heater's broke anyway Take your power - Take your candle Your sweet whisper I just can't handle We'll take your hair in the deck lights Your blue eyes - Goodbye, good night I should tell you I should tell you I should tell you I should...NO! Another time - Another place Our temperature would climb There'd be a long embrace We'd do another dance It'd be another play Looking for romance? Come back another day Another day ##Katie The heart may freeze or it can burn The pain will ease if I can learn There is no future There is no past I live this moment As my last There's only us There's only this Forget regret Or life is yours to miss No other road No other way No day but today ##Jim Excuse me if I'm off track But if you're so wise Then tell me - How come you came Back? Take your beauty Take your sexy eyes And don't forget Get the deck light out of your hair Long ago - You might've lit up my heart But the fire's dead - Ain't never ever Gonna start Another time - Another place The words would only rhyme We'd be in outer space It'd be another song We'd sing another way You wanna prove me wrong? Come back another day Another day ##Katie There's only yes Only tonight We must let go To know what's right No other course No other way No day but today ##Katie ##Jim I can't control Control your Temper My destiny She doesn't see I trust my soul Who says that There's a soul My only goal Is just - to be Just let me be There's only now Who do you think You are? There's only here Give in to the love Barging in on me And my Or live in fear Guitar No other path Pretty girl, hey No other way The door is That way No day but today The heater's out Anyway No day but today Take your power Take your candle No day but today Take your blue Eyes Your pretty smile No day but today Your silhouette No day but today Another time Another place Another rhyme No day but today A warm embrace Another dance Another way Another chance Another day No day but today #16. Will I? [wrist support] ##Georgie,Meg Will I loose my dignity Will someone care Will I wake tomorrow >From this nightmare ##Al & Callie Will I loose my dignity Will someone care Will I wake tomorrow >From this nightmare ##Heather Will I loose my dignity Will someone care Will I wake tomorrow >From this nightmare ##Michelle Will I loose my dignity Will someone care Will I wake tomorrow >From this nightmare #17. In the Hall ##Ford, Bridger, and Crocker Christmas bells are ringing Christmas bells are ringing Out of town Santa Fe ##Dagwood Honest living Mmmmm Feliz Navidad! ##Nameless Seaman Evening officers ##Tim Smile for Ted Kopple or Mr. Martin ##Nameless Seaman And a merry Christmas to your family ##Tim and the others Right! [they walk past seadeck] ##Kristin Who the devil do you think you are? I don't need no bloody help >From some muscled up MP My works not for you to Make a name for yourself on [walking in] ##Lulu Easy sugar easy He was just trying to ##Kristin Just trying to use me to get ahead It's not that kind of project honey Just go. This ship is full of Bloody Military blokes! Hey Lucas You working tonight I thought not #18. Santa Fe ##Lulu The seaQuest ##Tim Uhuh ##Lulu Center of the universe ##Miggy Sing it girl - ##Lulu Times are shitty But I'm pretty sure they can't get worse ##Tim I hear you ##Lulu It's a comfort to know When you're singing the hit the sea blues That anywhere else you could possibly go After seaQuest would be a pleasure Cruise ##Miggy Now you're talking Well I'm thwarted by a Hyperion Nightmare and I'm sick of sleeping alone - all Alone I'm cumming in my sleep I need a lover Got my Lulu she's my baby so Let's open up a cyber bar in Santa Fe Oh sunny Santa Fe would be nice Let's open up a cyber bar in Santa Fe And leave this to the urchins and lice ##All Oooooh ##Lulu My lover boy ##All My lover boy ##Miggy You're a sensitive aesthete Make a Tom Collins for me You could make the menu sparkle With rhyme You could wire us to make fun And I could take checks as the come Chatting not about finances but wine! Let's open up a cyber bar in Santa Fe Our labors would reap financial gains ##all Gains gains ##Miggy We'll open up a cyber bar in Santa Fe And save from devastation our brains #All Save our brains We'll pack up all our junk and sail so far away Devote ourselves to projects that sell We'll open up a cyber bar in Santa Fe Forget this cold military hell Oh - Oh ##Miggy Do you know the way to Santa Fe? You know tumble weeds...prairie dogs... Yeah #19, I'll Cover You[the hall] ##Tim I'll meet you at the show I'll try to convince Jimbo to go ##Lulu Alone at last! ##Miggy He'll be back I guarantee ##Lulu I've been hearing violins all night! ##Miggy Anything to do with me? Are we a thing? ##Lulu Darling...we're everything! ##Lulu Live in my bunk I'll be your mattress Just pay me back With one thousand kisses Be my lover - I'll cover you ##Miggy Open your door I'll be your roommate Don't got much baggage To lay at your feet But sweet kisses I've got to spare I'll be there - I'll cover you ##Both I think they meant it When they said you can't buy love Now I know you can rent it A new lease you are, my love, On life - Be my life Just slip me on I'll be your blanket Wherever - Whatever - I'll be your coat ##Lulu You'll be my king And I'll be your castle ##Miggy No you'll be my queen And I'll be your moat ##Both I think they meant it When they said you can't buy love Now I know you can rent it A new lease you are, my love, On life All my life I've longed to discover Something as true as this is ##Miggy ##Lulu So with a thousand Sweet kisses If your cold I'll cover you You're lonely With a thousand Sweet kisses You've got one I'll cover you Nickel only With a thousand Sweet kisses When you're worn I'll cover you Out and tired With a thousand Sweet kisses When your heart I'll cover you Has expired ##Both Oh lover I'll cover you Oh lover I'll cover you #20. We're Okay [Freddy's quarters] ##Freddy [on the vidphone] Tony - Freddy The lysander? A burnt engine! Good work lieutenant! [pal rings] We're okay Honeybear wait I'm on the vidphone Yes I have the cowbell We're okay [into vid] So tell them it's screwed But a new turbine will do Brand new outer hull and laser banks too Tony you're great [into pal] No you cut the paper plate Didja cheat on Tim a a lot would you say? We're okay Honey hold on... [into vid] Tony hold on... [presses new call button] Hello? Dad - Yes I called you Lonnie is coming to mothers party We're okay [into pal] Honeybear what? Shan's lesbian sister I'll tell them [into vid] You heard? [into pal] They heard We're okay [into vid as she hands up] And to you dad [into pal] Yes Jill is there [into vid] Tony gotta [into pal] Jill with the short black hair? The calvin Klien model? [into vid] Tony gotta go! [into pal] The model who lives in San Trope? We're... We're okay! I'm on my way End Act 1 part one ________________________________________ When I was a girl we respected respect. Respect was not a word to be laughed at. It had meaning and do you know why? Becuase we respected respect. ________________________________________ :@) :@( theatre pigs! From the breweries To yoga, to yogurt, to rice and Beans and cheeze To leather, to dildos, to curry vindaloo Huevos Racheros and Maya Angelou ##Lonnie and Miggy Emotion, devotion, to causing a Commotion Creation, vacation ##Tim Mucho masturbation ##Lonnie and Miggy Compassion, to fashion, to passion When it's new ##Miggy To Sontag ##Lulu To Sondhiem ##Lonnie To anything taboo ##Jim and Miggy Ginsberg, Dylan, Cunningham and Cage ##Miggy Lenny Bruce ##Jim Langston Hughes ##Lonnie To the stage ##Katie To Uta ##Freddy To Buddha ##Lonnie and Tim Pablo Neruda too ##Tim and Katie Why Dorothy and Toto went over the Rainbow To blow off Auntie Em ##All La Vie Boheme ##Lonnie And wipe the speakers off before You pack ##Freddy Yes, Lonnie ##Lonnie Well hurry back [smooooooch!] ##Hudson Like sisters? ##Lonnie We're close ##Lulu,Miggy and Tim Brothers! ##Tim, Lulu, Katie Bisexuals, trisexuals, homo sapiens Carcinogens, hallucinogens, men Peewee Herman German wine, turpentine, Gertrude Stein Antonioni, Bertolucci, Kurosawa, Carmina Burana ##All To apathy, to entropy, to empathy, ecstasy Vaclav Havel - The sex pistols -8BC To no shame - Never playing the Fame game ##Miggy To marijuana ##All To sodomy It's between God and me To S&M ##Benny Waiter...waiter...waiter! ##All La Vie Boheme ##Miggy In honor of the death of Bohemia an impromptu Salon will commence immediately following dinner... Katie Hitchcock, clad only in bubble wrap Will perform her famous bar room seduction Song to the sounds of iced tea being stirred ##Jim Tim O'Neil will preview his new documentary about His inability to hold an erection on holy obligation days ##Tim Lonnie Henderson back from her spectacular One - Night engagement at the seaQuest crew Hall, will sing Native American tribal chants Backwards through her vocoder, { *p.s. those are the actual words!!!* } while Accompanying herself on the electric violin - Which she has never studied ##Benny Your new boyfriend doesn't know About us? ##Katie There's nothing to know ##Benny Don't you think that we should discuss -- ##Katie It was too long ago ##Benny He doesn't act like he's with you ##Katie We're taking it slow ##Benny Where is he now? ##Katie He's right -- Hmm ##Benny Uh huh ##Katie Where'd he go? ##Tim Jimbo will attempt to write a bittersweet Evocative song [Jim picks up a guitar and plays] That doesn't remind us of "Musetta's Waltz" ##Miggy Lucas "Lulu" Wolenczak will model the Latest fall fashions from Paris while Accompanying herself on the ten gallon Plastic pickle tub ##Lulu And Miggy will recount his exploits As abductee - including the tale of His successful reprogramming of the Hyperion interstellar ship to self - Destruct as it broadcast the words ##All Actual Reality - Act up - Fight CT ##Benny Shit! ##Katie Excuse me - Did I do something wrong? I get invited - then ignored - all night long ##Jim I've been trying - I'm not lying No one's perfect I've got baggage ##Katie Life's too short - babe- time is flying I'm looking for baggage that goes With mine ##Jim I should tell you -- ##Katie I've got baggage too ##Jim I should tell you -- ##Both Baggage - smuggled ##All Beer! [Katie's alarm on her watch beeps] ##Katie Cortisone break ##Jim You? ##Katie Me. You? ##Jim Katie #24. I Should Tell You ##Jim I should tell you I'm disaster I forget how to begin it ##Katie Let's just make this part go faster I have yet -- to be in it I should tell you ##Jim I should tell you ##Katie I should tell you ##Jim I should tell you ##Katie I should tell I blew the candle out Just to get back in ##Jim I'd forgotten how to smile Until your candle burned my skin ##Katie I should tell you ##Jim I should tell you ##Katie I should tell you ##Both I should tell ... Well, here we go Now we - ##Katie Oh no ##Jim I know --This something is Here goes -- ##Katie Here goes ##Jim Guess so It's starting to - Who knows - ##Katie Who knows ##Both Who knows were Who goes there Who knows Here goes Trusting desire - Starting to learn Walking through fire without a burn Clinging - a shoulder a leap begins Stinging and colder, asleep on pins So here we go Now we -- ##Jim Oh no ##Katie I know ##Jim Oh no ##Both Who knows where - Who goes there Here goes - here goes Here goes - here goes Here goes - here goes #25, La Vie Boheme B ##Lonnie Are we packed? ##Freddy Yes and by next week I want you to be ##Lonnie Pookie? ##Freddy And you should see They've turned all the heat off He opened the ballasts And we're sittin on the bottom of the sea Benny called the guards ##Lonnie That Fuck ##Freddy They don't know what they're doing The guards are clearing the hall But no one's leaving They're just sittin there mooing! ##All Yea! To lead ##Katie No way to make a living, masochism, Pain, perfection Muscle spasms, Chiropractors, shortened Shifts, eating disorders ##All Film ##Tim Adventure, tedium, no family, boring Locations, Dark rooms, perfect faces, egos, Money, capeQuest and sleaze ##All Computers ##Lulu Food of love, emotion, mathematics - Isolation, Rhythm, feeling, power, harmony, And heavy competition ##All Anarchy ##Miggy and Lonnie Revolution, justice, screaming for Solutions Forcing changes, risk and danger, Making noise and making pleas ##All To faggots, lezzies, dykes, cross Dressers too ##Lonnie To me ##Tim To me ##Miggy and Lulu To me ##All To you, and you, and you, you, you and you To people living with, living with Living with Not crying from CT Let he among us without sin Be the first to condom La vie Boheme La vie Boheme La vie Boheme ##Tim Anyone out of the Mainstream Is anyone in the Mainstream Anyone alive - with a Sex drive Tear down the wall Aren't we all The opposite of war Isn't peace It's creation ##All Woooooooo! La vie Boheme ##Tim The riot continues The mess kitchen goes up in flames The crowd dances Oblivious Katie and Jim Exchange a small, lovely kiss ##All Viva La Vie Boheme END ACT I INSERT FEEDBACK HERE! ________________________________________ When I was a girl we respected respect. Respect was not a word to be laughed at. It had meaning and do you know why? Becuase we respected respect. ________________________________________ :@) :@( theatre pigs! From what? ##Jim >From facing your failure, facing your Loneliness Facing the fact you live a lie Yes you live a lie - Tell you why You're always preaching not to Be numb When that's how you thrive You pretend to create and observe When you really detach from feeling Alive ##Tim Perhaps it's because I'm the one of us To survive ##Jim Poor baby ##Tim Katie still loves Jimbo Is Jimbo really jealous Or afraid that Katie's hurt ##Jim Katie did look sore ##Tim Katie's gotten weak Katie's hands are falling off Jimbo's falling off the boat ##Jim No more! Oh no! I've gotta go ##Tim Hey for somebody who's always been let down Who's heading out of town? ##Jim For somebody who longs for a relationship of his Own, who's with his camera alone? I'll call I hate the fall [Katie emerges from the background] You heard? ##Katie Every word You don't want baggage without Lifetime guarantees You don't want to watch me cry? I just came to say Goodbye love Goodbye love Came to say goodbye, love, goodbye ##Jim Just came to say Glory Goodbye love One blaze of Goodbye love Glory Goodbye love Goodbye Have to find [Jim leaves and Benny wanders back over to Katie] ##Katie Please don't touch me Understand I'm hurt I need to ease the pain ##Tim I know a way - a treatment ##Benny A knife job? ##Katie Maybe - could you? ##Benny I'll pay ##Katie Goodbye love Goodbye love Came to say goodbye, love, goodbye Just came to say Goodbye love Goodbye love Goodbye love Hello CT [Katie runs off sobbing] ##Pastor Off the premises now! We don't give a military discount here! ##Tim What happened to rest in peace? ##Pastor Off the premises you queers! ##Miggy Is that anyway to send a girl to meet her maker? They had to know we couldn't pay the undertaker ##Benny Don't you worry about her I'll take care of it ##Tim Must be nice to have money ##All No shit! ##Miggy I think it's only fair to tell you You just paid for the funeral of the person who Hacked into your computer ##Benny I know... I always knew He couldn't keep his hands off of anything Let's pay the man and go get drunk ##Tim I can't I have a meeting ##Miggy and Benny Workaholic Tim get a life #13. What You Own ##Tim [pretending] Hi Tim O'Neil...film maker for Tony Piccolo's Productions. Coming Up vampire welfare queens who are compulsive bowlers... Oh God what am I doing? Don't breathe too deep Don't think all day Dive into work Sail the other way That drip of hurt That pint of shame Goes way Just play the game You're working for the UEO At the start of the millennium You're working for the UEO Leave your conscience at the tone And when you're working for the UEO At the start of the millennium You're what you own [Cut to Jim driving on a desert highway] ##Jim The film maker cannot see ##Tim And the song writer cannot hear ##Jim Yet I see Katie everywhere ##Tim Lulu's voice is in my ear ##Jim Just tighten those shoulders ##Tim Just clench your jaw till you frown ##Jim Just don't let go ##Both Or you may drown You're working for the UEO At the start of the millennium You're working for the UEO Were it's like the Twilight Zone And when you're working for the UEO At the start of the millennium Your what you own So I don't own a notion I escape and ape content I don't own emotion - I rent ##Tim What was it about that night ##Jim What was it about that night ##Both Connection - in an isolating age ##Tim For once the shadows gave way to Light ##Jim For once the shadows gave way to Light ##Both For once I didn't disengage ##Tim Lulu - I hear you - I hear it I see it - I see it My film! ##Jim Katie I see you - I see it I hear it - I hear it My song! ##Tim ##Jim Tony - Tim One song - Glory Call me a hypocrite Katie I need to finish my Own film Your eyes I quit ##Both Dying in the UEO At the start of the millennium We're dying in the UEO To come into our own And when you're dying in the UEO At the start of the millennium You're not alone I'm not alone I'm not alone #14. Vid mail #5 ##Jim's Mom Jimmy This is your mother Jimmy honey I don't get these postcards "Moving to Santa Fe" "Back on seaQuest" Jimmy I miss you Jimmy where are you? ##Miggy's Mom Miggy, chico, donde esta? Tu mama esta yamando Donde estas, Miggy ##Mr. Fredericks Kitten - Where ever are you? ##Tim's Mom Tim -Are you there - Are you there I don't know if he's there We're all here wishing you were here too - Where are you Tim are you there are You where are you Tim -Are you there - Are you there I don't know if ##All the 'rents Please call ##Tim's Mom Your mother end Act 2 part 1 ________________________________________ When I was a girl we respected respect. Respect was not a word to be laughed at. It had meaning and do you know why? Becuase we respected respect. ________________________________________ :@) :@( theatre pigs!