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                            A NIGHT IN THE TOWN
                                Ann M. Martin
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   Timeline: SeaQuest DSV (Season 2)
   Author's E-Mail: amartin10@juno.com
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AUTHOR'S NOTES:

Title: A Night on the Town   by Ann Martin 1/1
PARODY
Rated: PG
Summary: Brody thumbs through his little black book, with a crossover.


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"Shore LEAVE! All RIGHT!" Brody shouted as he stepped off the launch,
Tony, Lucas, and Tim in tow.

"Great," O'Neill said, looking at the small island. "Yet another night of
sitting alone in a bar waiting for someone to tell me I have great hair
in Swahili."

"I don't know, Tim, you gotta find somebody," Piccolo told him.

"I, on the other hand," Brody sighed, pulling a hand through his hair,
"already *have* somebody. And I am going to the hotel to shower and give
her a call."

As he walked away, Lucas sighed. "A girlfriend in every port."

"And bar. And restaurant. And apartment complex. And street corner. And
mall." O'Neill added.

***

Brody stepped out of the shower, looking at himself in the mirror.

"Lookin' GOOOOD, Jimmy," he commented as he applied Old Spice. He threw
on an old grey sweatshirt and a pair of jeans.

He walked out of the bathroom and into the small hotel room. Brody
flopped down on the bed and flipped around the channels. There was
nothing too terrific on, except for some reruns of an old cheesy Sci-Fi
show.

"The 90s," he scoffed. "They ruined the show with all those psycho
people. But that guy with the hair-- he's okay...."

He looked at the clock. Only 9, but not too early to go out. There was
nothing else to do. He reached into his suitcase and rooted around for a
while. He then pulled out a not-so-little black book.

"Volume thirteen.... Hmm. No, I think I need 26..."

When he finally found what he was looking for, he pulled the phone over
to his lap. He dialed a number and waited while it rang.

"Stephanie!"

"Jim?"

"Hey, what're we doing tonight?"

"Um... sorry, Jim. I have plans. I was actually going to wash my hair."

She hung up the phone, the click resounding in his ear.

Washing her hair?

He flipped around in his book until he found a suitable number. Soon, she
picked up.

"Sarrraaaahhhh...."

"Sorry, Jim, shampooing." CLICK.

What the hell was going on here?

He dialed the last number he could find. The viewscreen popped up-- a
seemingly empty apartment.

"Jane?"

He listened for a moment--

"Oh, oh, it TINGLES! Yes, YES YES! Oh god, this is THE most conditioning
power I have felt in SUCH A LONG TIME! RINSE REPEAT! LATHER RINSE
REPEAT!"

-- and then hung up. He sighed and asked the hotel operator to connect
him to another room.

"Tim, Lucas, I uh, I wanted to know if maybe you wanted to grab a pizza."

"Sorry, buddy. We're washing our hair. Turns out it was getting *really*
greasy."

He hung up and thumbed through the yellow pages.

"Large pepperoni...."


THE END
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Haha. I could make fun of Brody until Henderson settled down and had a
family!

Ann Martin
~~Questie, Cary Elwes Fanatic, *this* close to~~
               ~~stalking Craig Kilborn~~
"MOOOOOOOOO!"