========================================================================== DEMONS II. Kathy Wolenczak a.k.a. Kathleen Brown ========================================================================== Timeline: SeaQuest DSV Author's E-Mail: kwolenczak@hotmail.com ========================================================================== AUTHOR'S NOTES: What a great reaction/formal welcome _that_ was. :) Ask and ye shall recieve. :) ========================================================================== Demons II. 2018. Remember how cocky and arrogant Lucas was? Well, apparently, one of his sarcastic comments finally pushed a young female officer over the edge. His comment wasn't directed to her, not even related to anything remotely having to _do_ with her. Either way, Lucas is in MedBay with two cracked ribs and a severe concussion and he won't stop crying. BRIDGER runs in, panicked at having heard Lucas was beaten up and is now in MedBay. WESTPHALEN looks up from tending to Lucas' bruises as Nathan walks in, and waves the older man out of the room. Bridger turns and leaves. Moments later, Westphalen walks out into the hallway, quietly shutting the door behind. BRIDGER What the hell happened!? WESPHALEN Jamie Flynn lost her temper and attacked him in the Galley. BRIDGER Well, is he hurt or just shaken up a bit? WESPHALEN Both, it seems. He's got a bad concussion and two cracked ribs. He won't stop crying and all he's doing is making it so much worse. I was hoping maybe you could calm him down a bit. BRIDGER Me!? What can I do? WESTPHALEN (understanding) He's a sixteen-year-old boy, Nathan, he's got his ego and his pride and he won't talk to me. He needs a father figure and that's you. He's scared. BRIDGER (yeah, right) And you want me to make everything better? WESTPHALEN You _can_, Nathan. Take a look at him, he's miserable, he _wants_ to tell someone what's wrong. It's not the concussion, it's more than that. Bridger walks into the room. Lucas is still crying into his hands, forgetting his male pride and _still_ crying. Nathan nearly stops short. He recognizes these tears. Fear and horror and sorrow and helplessness. The tears Nathan himself cried when he lost his son. Lucas is hunched over on a MedBay bed, holding his head in his hands. Bridger slowly walks up to him and sits beside him. Lucas looks up. He looks absolutely awful, tears are streaming down his cheeks, his eyes are red and raw from crying. Nathan gently takes Lucas into his arms and holds him close. Lucas lets loose his pain and fear, relaxing for blessed moments, sobbing out his troubles into the warmth of Nathan's arms. BRIDGER (gently stroking Lucas' hair) It's okay, son. Lucas finishes his sobbing and turns his head to rest his cheek against Nathan's chest. Bridger is just as comforted by this as Lucas is, Nathan misses his son, and this boy is just as shy and sweet as Robert was. Lucas sniffles a little as tears still stream down his cheeks. Lucas closes his soft blue eyes. LUCAS Captain? BRIDGER Yes, Lucas. LUCAS I'm scared. BRIDGER (very paternal, very comforting) It's all right, Lucas, you've got nothing to be afraid of. Nobody's gonna hurt you. Lucas sighs and goes limp with relief. Bridger holds him closer, still cradling the young man against his chest. LUCAS (genuinely scared) Captain, don't let anybody hurt me. BRIDGER Lucas, nobody's gonna hurt you. I'll take care of you. You just rest. Lucas hugs his captain. Bridger rests his cheek against Lucas' soft hair, lost in thought. Lucas sighs shakily, his crying over with, and basks in the warm glow of absolute love and safety. Morning, the next day. Lucas is just finishing a light breakfast, laying back in his bed to digest and, hopefully, recover from yesterday. Westphalen walks over to remove his empty tray from his side-table when Nathan walks in, cheerful. BRIDGER (sickeningly awake, vilely cheerful for this time in the morning) Morning, guys! Hey, Lucas, how ya' doin'? Lucas smiles, sitting up a bit. LUCAS (putting on a brave front) Okay, Captain. WESTPHALEN What's going on, Nathan? Bridger places the ball of cloth (jeans, a turtleneck, baseball shirt, socks, boxers and sneakers all wrapped up together) he was holding onto Lucas' bed. Lucas looks suspiciously at Nathan. LUCAS Captain? BRIDGER (nonchalantly) How'd you like to go out, Lucas? WESTPHALEN (slightly frightened) Oh, Nathan, not yet. It's still too early, he's still in considerable pain. BRIDGER Let the boy answer. Lucas swallows nervously, looking around. BRIDGER (outlining the day's activities) We'd be going up top, spending a little time at the beach, maybe grabbing a bite to eat. I want to talk to you, Lucas. Lucas looks at Westphalen for her approval. BRIDGER (gently guiding Lucas' face back towards him by way of a finger on Lucas' chin) No, Lucas, don't look at her, look at me. Do you want to go up top with me? LUCAS (helplessly) More than anything. Nathan gets quiet. Lucas desperately wants this, and wild horses couldn't keep Nathan from giving Lucas everything he wants. Nathan nods softly, gently patting Lucas' leg. He's quiet and very, very gentle with Lucas, who is obviously crying out for attention with those frightened blue eyes. BRIDGER (softly, Lucas is all that matters) Get dressed. We'll leave whenever you're ready. Lucas nods softly, sitting up, taking his black-eyed self out of bed to get dressed so may leave this boat, up to were the sun is bright and he may be healed. seaQuest Launch. Bridger is driving, not having a hard time alone at all, in fact, quite content with this. He glances over to the side, a look of paternal adoration on his face. Strapped safely in the seat is Lucas, leaning against the side of the launch, asleep. Beach. Lucas is there, sleeping on a sandy beach in the warm sun. Bridger is beside him, reading a novel. Lucas jerks himself awake, sitting up, gasping. Nathan sits up and takes off his half-glasses. BRIDGER You all right, Lucas? Lucas nods softly as he sits up, holding his ribs. He looks out toward the sea. BRIDGER (trying to stimulate conversation) You wanna go grab a bite to eat? Lucas shakes his head softly, gazing out toward the blue water, lost in thought. Nathan leans foreward and tries to see beyond Lucas' dark sunglasses. He tries to lighten Lucas' thoughtful mood, get the boy to talk. BRIDGER (softly) Why dolphins? Lucas turns to look at Nathan, thinking, wondering why he would ask this. He looks back out at the water, thinking of Darwin, watching a small school of dolphins swim passed, far out to sea. LUCAS (thoughtful) They're smart. Misunderstood. Kinda like me. BRIDGER (suspecting as much) You're lonely, aren't you? Lucas looks at Nathan, his sad blue eyes hidden by his small oval shades. LUCAS (mournfully) Would you be, Captain? I'm a sixteen-year-old kid in a world of adults. I can't ever leave and you guys are _always_ asking me for things. There are some days I just wanna be left alone, and then whenever I get that, all I want is for somebody to pay attention to me. Nathan looks closely at Lucas. Lucas looks at him. LUCAS (_wanting_ to tell) Captain, there's a lot about me you don't know. BRIDGER There's a lot about you I'd _like_ to know. LUCAS (simply) Ask. BRIDGER (thinks, grins) How do you know French? LUCAS (monotone, blah, blah, blah, this isn't what I wanted to be asked) I lived in Quebec a while with my father, I learned it there. Can I ask _you_ something? BRIDGER Anytime. LUCAS (sincerely _wanting_ to know) Do I remind you of your son? Nathan thinks. BRIDGER (trying to put it so as not to hurt Lucas) You're different. LUCAS How? BRIDGER You're more serious. Robert was always playing jokes on people, he loved to laugh. He was always very happy. Ashamed he can't be more like Bridger's son, he lowers his head, looking down at the sand. LUCAS (under his breath) He had a reason to be. BRIDGER What do you mean? LUCAS (wanting more than anything an offer to be adopted, but knowing it'll never happen) He had you as his father. And I'm sure he knew how much you and your wife loved him. Things are very different for me. BRIDGER How? (best) Do you wanna tell me about it, Lucas? Lucas looks at Nathan, taking off his glasses. His face is still badly bruised from the beating he took. He looks very sad. LUCAS (honestly believing it) My parents hate me. BRIDGER Oh, Lucas, that's not possible. LUCAS (nodding) Yes it is. If my father loved me would he hit me constantly? Would my mother emotionally abuse and neglect me? How could someone do that to their own _child_? BRIDGER (not taking the attention off Lucas, but simply asking, gently) Were your parents abused? LUCAS (bitterly) My father was a spoiled brat. BRIDGER What about your mother? Lucas nods softly, ashamed. BRIDGER No, don't feel bad, Lucas. What happened to her is no reason for her to treat you the way she did. LUCAS Captain, her father....he did bad things to her. _Very_ bad things. BRIDGER I know. (gently touching Lucas' shoulder) You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to, Lucas. LUCAS Do you want to hear or not? (Nathan nods softly)(Lucas is pulling up so many things he's been hiding) I wasn't what my father wanted in a child. Everything I did wasn't good enough, so my Dad hit me. Finally they got divorced, and I was crushed, even thought I knew it was a long time in coming, but I still missed my Dad. I cried at night for my Mom, but she never came. I became severely depressed, my doctor still thinks I should be on my medication, but since I tried to kill myself it's not safe. BRIDGER You tried to kill yourself? LUCAS (softly, trying to keep it as detached as possible) Almost made it, too. Anyway, I was depressed, I couldn't help what I was doing, but when I cried my mom'd say the most awful things to me. She'd make fun of me and make it _so_ much worse. And when I wouldn't stop crying, she'd threaten me and scare me half to death! BRIDGER (trying to be understanding) Must've been very difficult for you. LUCAS (giving a harsh, sarcastic laugh) Difficult?! Try impossible, why the hell do you think I tried to kill myself?! Studies have proven that children born into homes without love _die_. They get depressed and don't eat and have panic attacks and _die_! Captain, that's me and I can't live like that anymore. BRIDGER Lucas, we all care about you. LUCAS (getting furious) No, you don't understand. That woman didn't attack me, I attacked her! She started teasing me and I jumped on her, ... (getting gentle. slightly ashamed) ...but I couldn't do anything. I _wanted_ to hurt her and I _wanted_ to beat her senseless, but all I could do was cry. I didn't want to hit her anymore, I wanted her to hold me and tell me it'd be okay and it didn't matter if she apologized as long as she held me. But then _she_ started to hit me, just like Dad did. I didn't have the strength to fight back, I never have. This woman beat me as I lay there. I wasn't hurting her, I was just lying there crying and she was still hitting me. BRIDGER Why did everyone say she started it? LUCAS (yeah, right) To protect me. They didn't want me in trouble. Captain, please don't be mad. BRIDGER I'm not mad, Lucas. I can respect the fact that you had to protect yourself. Lucas' eyes become gentle. Fearful, trusting. He's got a brilliant mind which is, at this point in time, fragile, terribly sensitive. Bridger is gentle with him, trying to ease him into opening up. BRIDGER You say your father hit you. LUCAS (softly. ashamed, but open. in his mind, this is his fault.) Hit. Slapped, shoved, kicked once or twice. I remember once he threw a 12-pound candleholder at my head. (He rubs his head, near his temple) Gave me a pretty good scar, too. And I'm no stranger to concussions, believe me. Bridger looks closely at Lucas. BRIDGER (gently probing him, not grilling him) Why were you such a cynic when you came aboard seaQuest? LUCAS I knew you were gonna be there, Captain. I didn't want you to think I was some helpless little kid. I wanted to prove....I don't know. BRIDGER You wanted to show everybody that you could take care of yourself, _you_ didn't need them. Lucas nods softly. BRIDGER Lucas, you _do_ need them. You need them desperately. LUCAS (I know....) I was scared and lonely and confused, I didn't know what I was doing, I wanted to be something different than what everybody knew me as. BRIDGER What did they know you as? LUCAS (getting shy, scared) Shy, scared. Awkward. BRIDGER Lucas, the day I came aboard when you started talking about your family I _knew_ how scared you were, the mere fact you brought up something so painful just to spend some time with somebody _proved_ it to me. You were terribly lonely, I knew. LUCAS How? BRIDGER (smiling at the memory) You came to me. By then I knew it was only your second week there, I knew your history, to some extent. I had expected you to hate me, you hadn't been too warm and fuzzy to many other people, I expected you to act the same way towards me. I even expected you to _ignore_ me. But you didn't. You _came_ to me, it really wowed me that you could have the kind of courage to do that. You tried to make a friend out of me. Lucas lowers his head. LUCAS I'm sorry. BRIDGER Lucas...?! What for? LUCAS (wallowing in self-pity again) I'm stupid. BRIDGER (touching Lucas' hand) No, you're _not_ stupid. You're honest and brilliant and incredibly sensitive. You're _not_ stupid. I was honestly very touched that you went out of your way, took a _huge_ leap like that, and did that. You made me feel welcome, _you_ were one of the three big reasons I stayed. LUCAS What were the other two? BRIDGER Well, the fact that you needed me, I couldn't let go of Darwin, and I needed to go on. Lucas, you mean tremendous amounts to me, you're like my own child, I love you. I want you to tell me things, I want you to tell me when things begin to bother you. I can control the crew, I can get you time off, I can give you a hug if that's all you need, you just have to _come_ to me. Lucas is quiet. BRIDGER Are you all right? LUCAS (turning to Bridger, his eyes lowered) Did you ever wish you could end it all? BRIDGER (grabbing Lucas' shoulders, holding him firmly in front of his face.) _Nothing_ in life is worth that, Lucas. _Nothing_. LUCAS (bitter) What if you can't have a life because you're so damn lonely all the time? Bridger looks at the boy a moment. His usually clear blue eyes are dull, lifeless, mildly fearful. He's looking at Bridger, waiting for an answer. He's got a slight bit of cockiness to him, waiting for Bridger to say that he's the right one. He wants to prove himself better. Then, further down, into the deepest range of Lucas' emotion. Terror. Terror that Nathan will be proven wrong and Lucas will be the right one and then, he'll be the higher power in this relationship. Who will Lucas go to when he's scared? Who will hold him while he cries? Lucas wants to be wrong more than ever in his entire life. Nathan glances down at Lucas' hands. They're tightly clasped in his lap, wringing each other out in anxiety. Nathan looks back into Lucas' eyes, where tears are forming. He's lost, and he wants to find his way back home. Nathan sighs deeply and leans toward Lucas, gently gathering him into his arms. Lucas is shaking violently, uncontrollably. Nathan holds him close as Lucas struggles against his gasps, suppressing sobs and his need to express all that he feels. Nathan gently strokes Lucas' soft hair, and Lucas' dam is broken, his tears flood out in a rush. He's hysterical now, unable to control any one part of himself for more than thirty seconds at a time. Nathan has to force Lucas to lay against his chest, he's struggling almost, trying his damnedest to get himself under control. Here he sits sobbing, here, on the beautiful beach in the sun in the warm loving arms of his captain. Lucas can't fight it. He wants his Daddy, but Daddy's not here, Daddy doesn't love him anymore. Lucas wants to go home. Nathan knows that Lucas _is_ home. Nathan gently peels Lucas off of him and looks into his eyes. Lucas is sniveling pathetically, still aching to wrap his arms around Nathan. He can't tear himself away, and it kills Nathan to hold Lucas away. LUCAS (in too much pain for me to even put into words) Do you hate me, too? Nathan shakes his head in sorrow. Poor child's exhausted. BRIDGER I could never hate you, Lucas. It's almost two, both of us need something to eat. Let's go find someplace and get you out of the sun. Okay? Lucas nods softly, wiping his cheek with the back of his hand. Restaurant. Lucas and Bridger are there together, sharing a booth against a wall. Nathan is dipping french fries into a sea of Ketchup while Lucas quietly sits and sips his Pepsi (Coke! Pepsi! Coke! HA HA, my script, Pepsi!!!). BRIDGER (pointing it out) You barely touched your food. Lucas glances down at the plate of nondescript pasta and marinara sauce. Lasagna....maybe. He barely remembered it was there. LUCAS I'm not hungry. BRIDGER (smiling) You don't eat much, do you? LUCAS (looking down at his soda) Not since I was thirteen. BRIDGER What happened when you were thirteen? LUCAS (sighs) For two weeks I didn't eat. I got scared I was anorexic so I made myself eat from then on, but I've never really enjoyed _food_. BRIDGER Why didn't you eat for those two weeks? LUCAS (exhales sharply, bringing his soda to his lips) Thought it'd make my parents notice me. Boy, was I wrong. Well, mom noticed, once, told me to knock it off and then didn't care. She said it was my life, said I could ruin it if I wanted. BRIDGER That's wrong, Lucas. No one should be treated that way. LUCAS Don't I know it. BRIDGER Anything you wanna talk about? LUCAS (pushing it down inside) There's nothing _to_ tell. I'll be right back. Lucas leaves to the men's room, Nathan watches him. Lucas is nervous in this restaurant/seedy bar, afraid to make a wrong move, step where he shouldn't, tick off one of the men sitting at the bar nursing a brandy for the past hour. Lucas leaves and the door swings shut behind him, and in a cold rush Nathan knows something isn't right here. Nathan enters the cold, dirty, men's room. Three stalls line a wall, and a single sink with a grimy mirror faces him. He looks around, and a soft, jagged sigh catches him from the side. Nathan walks over to the stalls, and behind one of the unlocked doors sees a small, thin-fingered, pale hand on the floor near the door. Nathan pulls the door open to find Lucas huddled on the floor, weeping softly into the knees held close to his chest. Lucas looks up at Nathan, his face tear-streaked and miserable. LUCAS (pleading) Why can't you leave me alone? BRIDGER Because I care, Lucas. LUCAS (smiling, but not happy) Why did you have to start now, just when I'm getting used to crying in solitude? Bridger crouches beside Lucas. BRIDGER You wanna leave? Lucas nods gently. Nathan helps him up off the floor. In the bright sun, Lucas is feeling better. He's getting it through his skull that not everyone wants to hurt him, Captain Bridger actually cares about him. BRIDGER (looking around at a large, grassy field, spying Lucas' Marlins shirt) Wanna play baseball? LUCAS (flatly) No. BRIDGER (grinning) Aw, c'mon. LUCAS _No_. BRIDGER Why not? LUCAS (making excuses, but not lying) Cause I suck. BRIDGER So do I, but I don't care. LUCAS I don't want to. BRIDGER Why? LUCAS (getting emphatic, he doesn't want to have to say more than this) Because I _suck_, I'm no good at baseball. BRIDGER It's not about who "wins" or "loses" as long as you have fun. LUCAS I'm not _gonna_ have fun. BRIDGER Why? LUCAS (damnit, once and for all!!) Because I _suck_!!! (softly) I wanna go home. BRIDGER (patronizing him, making fun of him, essentially) Why, because I suggested we do something you're not good at? LUCAS No. BRIDGER Why, then? LUCAS (drained) Because I'm _tired_. BRIDGER I don't believe you. LUCAS (hurt. But it's true) Why? BRIDGER (furious) Because you spent the entire morning _asleep_!! LUCAS (getting whiny, his store of energy's wearing thin, he hasn't eaten much, his head hurts) I wanna go _home_.... BRIDGER We're not going home until you tell me what's going on. LUCAS (trying to convince Nathan) I hate playing baseball. BRIDGER That's not what this is about. LUCAS Yes, it is, and you won't believe me. I'm tired, I wanna go home. There's a pause in the argument. Nathan sees Lucas, watches as before his very eyes, Lucas becomes pale, more withdrawn. He hides his emotions deep down where Nathan can't ever get him. He hides how he's feeling in the deepest recesses of his heart, where he feels all his pain, but shows no one. Nathan lightens up when he sees this reaction in the boy. Lucas lowers his head, he's getting more and more exhausted as time passes, his argument is getting lamer and lamer as he just doesn't have the _capacity_ to think of a way to explain why he simply _can't_. BRIDGER (quietly) Give me one good reason why you don't want to play baseball with me, and then we'll go home. LUCAS I'm no good at baseball. BRIDGER (gently) All that matters is that you have fun. LUCAS But I won't. BRIDGER (keeping his voice low) I don't believe that's true. Lucas looks up at Nathan. He's crumbling. His one friend is turning on him, the _one_ person he trusted has completely betrayed every inkling of trust Lucas bestowed on him. He has a good reason, but is too shy to tell, and he's being forced into a corner where his only option is to dash for escape or tell. He _can't_ tell. He's shaking in fear that his secret will be lost. From behind his dark sunglasses, his single terrified tear rolls down his cheek. BRIDGER (realizing) I'm sorry.... Lucas runs away. He turns and runs as far away from Nathan as he can get. Nathan runs after him, calling out his name. Nathan chases after the frightened young boy, always about twenty feet behind. Lucas ducks between two buildings, into a light, grassy, alleyway (I've seen them, they _do_ exist). Nathan follows after him. Lucas is absolutely terrified of what will happen _now_, now that he's gone and tried to run away. He goes to hop a fence, but doesn't have the momentum. He whacks into it and jumps back at the sight of a rather large dog barking at him. He jumps right into Nathan, who wraps his arms tightly around Lucas, whose sunglasses fell off about four blocks ago. Lucas collapses into tears. Nathan gently guides Lucas onto the ground, stroking his hair and letting him cry it out. Lucas speaks through his tears. LUCAS My dad loved baseball. He always tried to get me to play with him. I never wanted to. One day last spring he got really mad at me for holing up inside my room and smashed my computer with a bat. Then he hit _me_ with it. He broke my jaw. Bridger hold Lucas close, realizing the _huge_ mistake he made. Lucas' life revolves around his experiences as a child, everyone's does. Nathan just needs to remember it wasn't that long ago and not only that, Lucas is too frightened to tell anyone why he's so upset. Nathan needs to learn to trust Lucas' judgment. Lucas knows his limits intimately, Nathan just needs to learn them, too. _seaQuest_'s Bridge. One week later. It's night, nearly eleven o'clock. Nathan is working side-by-side with Ortiz on something at the sensor station. Lucas comes in, quiet, reserved. He makes his way up to meet the captain. He announces his presence by getting slightly in Bridger's way, then backing off. He looks at Lucas, but Lucas simply leans slightly against Nathan as he watches Ortiz work. Nathan smiles and wraps his arm around Lucas, continuing to gently coach Ortiz. Fade out. The End. ========================================================================== Copyright Kathleen Brown, May 1997